(un)titled if
if i ever make it big i am getting a pet llama i say pet but we will really be pals i am going to name him aloysious lleonard ennenbach the third
(un)titled ode XXV
i would be the ring upon your finger the gems around your neck for you are the words within my skull the beating of my heart alas fair lass nature made you dazzling without my feeble touch and made me quite lesser without yours
(un)titled thought XXXII
i am just about done. if i am quiet i apologise. but i cannot do this parody any more.
(un)titled bottom
as it falls apart i thought how much worse can it get that is when the hot water heater tank cracked open
(un)titled thought XXXI
she told me it would get better someday we both know she lies but i appreciate it all the same
abandon
my poem about men being monsters and women laying eggs got me a seven day ban on facebook i saw that and wondered why the day would begin this way then i got an email from my daughter an email i wondered ah they shut my phone off again depression loves little itching my negative […]
j(u)st one
one hello can be worth a dozen goodbyes but one goodbye may be something you never recover from
arduous
talking can be as arduous as watching a tortoise eat a head of lettuce the pace will drive me insane frivolity in exchange of sincerity i would much rather kiss your neck or nibble your collar bone
(un)titled sorrow IX
when i found her i gave up a part of me unfortunately she never gave me a part of her back so i just lost something valuable and gained a measure of sorrow
(un)titled ode XXIV
there is a beauty in the wretched. in the damned. and there is a beauty in you my love. that i will never fully grasp in these sloppy odes.
postmark IV
i sent a letter to my father today. wrote it on the back of a pack of marlboros and placed it in an empty can of beer. just a note of thanks. i have given time and space a lot of thought. i scribbled carefully, john ennenbach father streator illinois two thousand and three. i […]
cr(i)minal
the question he begged the court to answer was simple all of his crimes were self inflicted he was the victim by his own hand so clearly death was only fair the jury of his fears watched solemnly from the mirror no hint on their similar faces
(spring)
spring is the soul of a child the world around awakens to a sense of immortality
(un)titled sorrow VIII
it weighs heavily today a stone wheel slowly grinding me from man to meat from flesh to failing sitting in my skull tap tapping away the many flaws from cracks to crevices bending hope to hopeless obliterates as it alliterates casting dream to dreary i soak in the piss warm waters of wavering wistful wants […]
jumble
tired of being cold alone trapped in this cycle of desire and painfully throbbing desire incapable of finding the secret combination of letters to unlock the puzzle conundrum riddle here is what i have found so far eppvhoialssne the hint says two words without meaning to the poet illiterate
postmark III
i sent a letter to hunter, postmarked today. i folded it up and put it in a pack of dunhills. just a note of thanks. i have given up on bending time and space. but i hope he gets it. i carefully typed on the label hunter s thompson father of gonzo snowy owl creek […]
(un)titled ode XXIII
she is that small window from june 20th to june 21st when spring transitions to summer is there any wonder that the world adores her so
tr(u)ths
when i am dead and long forgotten certain truths will remain i loved (though she never knew it) i lived (though it wasn’t with her) i cried (for the longing i feel for her) and this singular moment right here we shared you and i maybe not at the exact same time but it was […]
(un)titled ode XXII
the world is a treadmill i run and run yet no matter how fast my legs pump how hard my shoes slap the earth beneath i cannot escape how much my every heart beat beats for you
old fri(end)s
she asked me if i fear death i smiled no i said i do it a little every day we are old friends
(un)titled ode XXI
the tissue of my heart has crystalized a rigid structure formed of former flesh her lips are the chisel her eyes the hammer i am dust in her presence my soul is sand between her delicate fingers spilling to the ground under her feet
the case of a confusing world i do not understand
when i have to leave my cave. i have a routine. keys wallet phone pat pockets twice. when i go to sleep. i have a routine. stare at ceiling love to kids love to her. everything else is a mystery. i cannot hope to understand
postmark II
i sent a letter to bukowski, postmarked today. i placed it in an empty wine bottle and set it next to a racing forum on the corner. just a note of thanks. i still haven’t worked out time travel and such. but i hope he gets it. i scribbled on the label charles bukowski struggling […]
format
it is haiku time not sure why, just had an urge now it is over. here is a bonus to explain the last haiku out of syllables. maybe a tanka will give me the chance to say why i chose haiku i like the rigid format i really just wanted to never mind. i love […]
(un)titled thought XXX
men are monsters but easy to figure out sex and attention occasionally woman are scarier they are lovely smell good sweet nurturing and seek to burrow into your heart and lay eggs
(un)titled image II
i saw a photo of two women happily gazing into an oven from the fifties. there was no context or words. whatever it was in there must have been glorious judging by their expressions. it could have been anything. or just an advertisement for ovens. i will never know. but in my head it was […]
(un)titled ode XX
her lips are as red as blood on porcelain her eyes stab me like daggers i cannot stop imagining how good she would taste on my tongue and lips her expression says fuck you mine says i am yours in return
sorr(y)
the anxiety is insufferable lately when i was writing the book i could lose myself and feel a sense of progress purpose now as i begin a new one my confidence is shattered again second guessing my second guesses spinning tires churning out poems for fear of anything else everything else i am sorry everyone […]
differing states
one day i made the decision to move to texas realizing one state of depression looks the same as any other from the bottom of the barrel one day i will leave texas and be depressed somewhere new
w(i)n
she never plays games with me but there are rules which are strictly enforced and i follow them to the letter in hopes her heart is the prize
(un)titled ache
does it ever stop hurting does the ache ever stop or does it stay jammed in the back of the throat forever and ever like the words i never said forever lodged behind the tears that never stop falling
(un)titled ode XIX
i repeat myself for the millionth time in an ode of love to her why does each repetition feel like a fresh declaration a new dedication when the words are still the same.
(un)titled sorrow VII
right at the edge of a break down feet dangling over this cliff barely keeping myself together there has to be an end to this falling in love is a form of suicide impossible without u and i as the sorrow strangles and engulfs me peering into the shadowed abyss
(un)titled sorrow VI
it is cold in here the emptiness seems to compound it wherever you are i hope it is peaceful warm happy that the sun shines down upon you the ravens of sorrow do not mar your view there is a murder of them circling overhead here untouched by the cold
eq(u)at(i)on
mathematically speaking i am less than the sum of my desires a fractured fraction failing common core aestetics divisive multiplied by the power of you i² x u²= i sobbing alone
(un)titled ode XVIII
she carved the outline of a door into my breastbone with her sharpened fingernail. i stared at it and her in a mixture of pain and confusion. she smiled and knocked upon the bloody door. it opened. my heart soared from my chest like an owl from a snowy perch. now it is free to […]
(un)titled sorrow V
i wonder if i am but a storm to you. destined to fall endlessly. and only be a minor inconvenience.
w(i)nter
winter is the soul of lost lovers the virginal snow like the shroud on a corpse
(un)titled truth
if his disabilities were physical maybe he could rise above them instead they drown him
after the kids leave i am left with the knowledge that
i shave my head so when the anxiety hits i cannot rip it out. my arms carry the scars of lighters and blades. my heart has your name carved into the dessicated muscle. some days feel like death on pause. as i desperately hit play. but the batteries have gone dead. lucky bastards.
(un)titled sorrow IV
fell asleep on the couch dreamt of you when i woke the room was empty been trying to fall back asleep since
duty
little spider on the toilet seat illicits quite the scream as she sees it in the middle of the night now she makes me check before she will go pee i am father i know no peace i protect
f(all)
autumn is the soul of a poet hanging from the branches of a gnarled bare tree
(un)titled sorrow III
feel trapped on this carousel. riding the narwhal with a rainbow horn. always right behind her. never gaining. the warped mirrors make it feel like falling behind while staying in the same place. just going up and down in circular logic. too much cotton candy and popcorn. not enough substance.
postmark
i sent a letter to poe, postmarked today in a small urn. i buried it in a shallow grave. just a note of thanks. i am mostly uncertain about the subtle nuances of bending time and space. hope he gets it. on the front i scribbled, e.a. poe throes of depression eighteen thirty six baltimore. […]
(un)titled image II
one day we will make love like a funeral procession under overcast skies with aching joints two skeletons in halloween costumes
writing prompt
https://wolffpoetry.com/writing-prompt-winner-november-24th-2018-centered-acrostic-poem-challenge/ so i saw this writing prompt challenge on Ms. Wolff’s wonderful site for a centered acrostic poem. i wasn’t really in it to win, just wanted to express my thanks to her for featuring me last month. but i did somehow. if you have been here before you know i am not one to […]
c(u)re
they wore long white coats carried clipboards syringes filled with murky green solutions to issues i didn’t know i had but no matter the treatments when i close my eyes i only see you. they cannot cure that i wouldn’t let them if they could.
black, like my heart
open invite to the universe come over for some coffee and cuddles coffee optional you’ll find the cuddles are piping hot i may be slightly bitter nothing your sweetness cannot remedy
(un)titled image
his face was like a weathered headstone there was once meaning etched there long ago now it was just a relic empty.devoid.blank. forgotten
(un)titled ode XVII
she whispers from across the sea across the cosmos across time and i listen.
1422
stop do you hear that for a second the world was still. it sounded like this
pb&j
the heavy shovel head cut me in twain my upper half sought solace my lower half sought hell all the while she sat eating a peanut butter and jelly sandwich uninterested in the world.
(in)vite
we met a vampire he was quite shy unpretentious we took him for ice cream he didn’t try any but he stared with big round eyes as it dripped down our hands onto the table we went home and he followed but i guess we forgot to invite him in sometimes i still see him […]
(un)titled ode XVI
the room is on fire smoke fills my lungs eyes burn she is an inferno i so desperately want to be consumed
scraping
scraping up change from the couch to get laundry done robbing peter then paul and any other good natured soul to get some groceries gave up my vices for destituion considering prostitution if things don’t turn around begged the financial institute for a stay of repossession things are bad and getting worse daily the life […]
sa(in)ne
i can’t tell if my poetry is evolving or if i am going insane
rea(within)son
the loneliness can kill you until you remember you are free. if i wanted to i could marry joan of arc. or marilyn monroe. i could do anything i want. i could discover a new continent. a new species of tortoise. be the first man on the moon. anything. within reason.
st(or)ms, or (i miss you), or (she), or (my fault)
she was safety a shelter from the storms that rage inside of me she was church or more likely an asylum with her the demons feared her light the voices stopped the sun still shined hope sprang eternal but she grew tired of the waves of the sea the constant battering the hurricane that is […]
(un)titled ode XV
there is a thin line between sacred scarred and scared. that line runs on intensity thoughts of you make me dance upon it all day long
(un)titled sorrow II
hope is a feather in a pile of used hypodermic needles love is an unanswered prayer littering the trash bin of purgatory the sky was the blue of sadness painted above him with uncertain hands, the sun a marble of remorse reflected off the dirty windows of the closed strip club across the street, the […]
br(i)ttle
i have lost plasticity my ceramic heart my thin glass soul unable to sustain deformation without shattering so i sit at the edge of this precipice in gale force winds i am just brittle teetering numb
plunge
the cyclical cycle of madness has taken the plunge from manic mayhem to insatiable sorrow fixated on the ugliness time to take a siesta unplug cannot tell if this is the post creative refractory period or if this is the entering of my blue period keep your hands and legs inside the car prepare for […]
f(r)iends
it sometimes feels like this self imposed hell is training for the afterlife except in hell i will be surrounded by all those i have loved i’ve broken down so many times the functional times are off putting i would give you all that i am but we both know you deserve so much better […]
consc(i)ous
scientists have discovered people are aware of the moment they die they are aware of conversations after the time of death has been called hearing nurses talk people sob immobile fading but listening the bright light of final oxygenated blood fading from the cerebral cortex traveling into the infinite vortex gasping grasping fleeting still heart […]
(un)sure
i wrote this the bus was on fire, the occupants were not children, they were demons with the faces of children, the driver just laughed as everything went up in flames sometime today i don’t know what i was thinking this wasn’t an ode to you if it was i sure can’t find the connection […]
ex(i)st
today i looked in my wallet and saw my driver’s license saw the same goofy looking face staring back at me on an official piece of identification irregardless of public opinion i exist
(un)titled ode XXIV
i wrote a new poem earlier it was garbage except it was about me loving you and this one is just about me writing about writing about loving you like the earlier one i trashed was a premonition it isn’t as if i stopped loving you i just stopped enjoying it being the only thing […]
common
the skin suit is weak failing every second he hopes maybe the words will live on all the greats died at least they will have that in common
(mess)age read
sometimes when the loneliness is too strong i text myself just something simple wondering where i am how things are going i never text back i am too busy being miserable
l(i)ving
there are rules to the game but no one ever wrote them down so instead we fumble about hoping we are playing it right keeping scores that are arbitrary at best i think i am losing but you seem to be doing great
(un)requited
feeling haunted by the ghosts of first kisses they hover at the edge of my lips whispering of times long dead shh can you hear them no they are mine alone my personal unrequited lullabye
deeply(shallow)
the river bed never sleeps yet settles for eroding the banks. that feels deeper than the shallows of my mind allows. as i sit and ponder the broken promises resting in the inky black.
(c)over
i saw the cover for my collection today it made it all real notches by m ennenbach my melancholy whimsies
(un)titled sorrow
i am so alone it could be worse at least that is what they say. fuck them though they aren’t sitting here crying with me i don’t think it could be worse. but who am i just a lonely fool with words for company
one dance
the music plays as i stand to the side and watch as the couples smile and twirl to the beat one day i shall hold you close stare into your beautiful eyes and the room will stare at us though i won’t know it blissfully unaware i only have eyes for you
(un)titled ode XXIII
i found myself fascinated with her clavicle with the gentle raised bumps of her spine in their graceful arc there is not an inch of her not a blemish nor scar that isn’t as if painted by matisse sculpted by michelangelo written by neruda composed by tchaikovsky my fingers dance upon her like baryshnikov my […]
gl(u)e
she asked what made me so broken makes me feel as if i could have it all and i held up my hands coated with decades of dried glue and shards of glass i can’t seem to put it back together again no matter how i try so now i just watch the light refract […]
(un)titled thought XXIX
are you real really real or did i dream you up am i real really real or an illusion in a funhouse mirror if i hold my breath and squeeze my eyes shut tightly i can hear the ocean thwump tiss thwump tiss if i hold my breath and think really hard really really hard […]
(un)titled ode XXII
i wish i knew your favorite animal the one you love the most the one you would keep as a pet if i knew which animal that was i would study in tibet behind enemy lines go against the chinese government learn the secrets of reincarnation of karmic return then i would commit crimes just […]
(un)titled ode XXI
the blank page stares at me on it all i can see is you another ode to this woman that haunts my mind and soul if i close my eyes you are in my arms i gently kiss the top of your head murmur my love when i open them again the page is filled […]
blackened friday
wrote this for black friday last year and a friend reminded me about it today so we can consider it a cyber monday deal at the manic word depot the walls are closing in on me this morning made the sacred pilgrimage to the Mart of Wal, the quest to find bread and milk a […]
a long way to go for little reward
i sat on the shore of the lake tossing pellets to the passing fowl an older gentleman sat near watching you look sad. he said i nodded need to chat. i asked if he ever wished he could do it all over again make better choices that would just make two more of them. i […]
(un)titled thought XXVIII
at some point in the middle of the night i woke up and wrote the word longing on a piece of paper by the bed and drew a series of hearts at least i think they are hearts without the aorta in place it is hard to tell maybe the pen was running low on […]
(un)titled ode XX
woke up after a long night of dreaming the sunlight through the blinds combined with the empty bed told me it was also another lonely night but the dreams were nice you were there again you looked as beautiful as i always imagine so it wasn’t a complete waste
(un)titled ode XIX
her lips across my throat like a razor her teeth come away crimson this is love by means of suicide
(un)titled ode XVIII
she glides across the room like a raven in flight my eyes are drawn to her every move she is beauty she is death i dream she is mine
pomegranate
early this morning i woke from a dream of pomegranate stained kisses last night before bed i spoke with my publisher about possibly using a pomegranate as the cover art for my collection when i woke from the dream i read a poem from one of my favorites she mentioned a pomegranate i fell back […]
(un)titled ode XVII
i know three things next to you the stars are the most beautiful thing i have ever seen and counting is not my strong suit but my appreciation for beauty is unmatched
sk(i)p
i need to fall in love with my own voice because i feel like a broken record. all the things i want would be better sought from within but i’m broken. so i listen to myself on repeat thinking the skip and the hiss have meaning they don’t.
(un)titled thought XXVII
if it wasn’t behind me long gone if i were to ever have more children i would name a daughter dolphin star call her my phinny star if he were a boy i would go with kraken cthulhu after cuddles i would scream release the kraken probably for the best for all parties that time […]
(un)titled thought XXVI
the neighbor’s dog barks and scratches at the door from when they leave until they return i feel the same wishing you would come knocking and relieve me of this hell i just need a collar with a bell
stylistic conceit
one day i hope to see myself as you see me on that day the lower case i will become nothing more than stylistic conceit one day perhaps
(i)
i shed my skin like a snake, leaving man sized balloons in my wake, faces left in mid scream from the pain of forced molting my muscles contort as bones shatter and joints pop from sockets, my mouth cracks wide as the muzzle if the beast comes forth i am no longer the man you […]
(un)titled thought XXV
it’s on the tip of my tongue i am fairly sure it is important but i’ll be damned if i know what it is feels like this isn’t the first time i have forgotten it so i am going to say it is it’s own damn fault for being so forgettable
rusted
some days i lay out in the sun to warm up my robot parts sometimes it rains then i just rust out on the lawn i don’t do it on purpose it is just hard to remember to care some days when all i want is to sit and stare into your eyes and remember […]
(un)titled thought XXIV
i sometimes wonder if this is all an elaborate ruse a mirage then i wonder why anyone would go through the effort to build such a vacant world just for me to suffer alone in
a pickle
i know a secret i fear i have said too much now you know a secret as well i won’t tell if you promise not to
fall(ing)(a)part
she wears an arboreal cloak leaving bits of red and yellow in her wake littering the ground with memories of laughter in the sun she turns the lights off early maybe to hide the fact she will soon be nude awaiting her fresh white blanket under fluffy gray remorse
ell
today shall be a day of writing he whispered to himself and he awoke to an abstract h so he lay in bed writhing as three bombs explode inside his head this is not the start he sought he thought as the abstract h held sway if it is truly mind over matter what matter […]
Mike's Manic Word Depot 