airport blues

terminal to terminal terminally ill sick of moving never sitting still racing from one end of the world to the final end of the world stark raving mad ravenous starving yet hate filled with longing to be loved training to be expected to take the train sitting on the floor of the vending area with […]

sheep

he was a sheep in wolf’s clothing a little man with a puffed up chest hidden behind muscles he couldn’t use but if attitude counted he was still nothing but a sack of shit staining whatever street he happened to slide down

dead

i don’t do funerals i don’t commiserate life is negative enough without rolling about in the pain instead i celebrate the soul not the husk being interred i have seen the light leave the eyes of friends of loved ones heard the death rattle the long exhalation sat in the room as the reaper attended […]

slip w/EC

at the sight of you i feel the incalculable weight of a thousand kisses fall like an avalanche across my chest breathing becomes labored as every cell screams not for oxygen but the rapture of your embrace i am lesser for your absence yet infinitely more for the simple joy of knowing you You slip […]

pinholes

there are pinholes in my darkness little rays of light lost lumens seeking an escape from the irrevocable emptiness that permeates my entirety cascading beams that exist only to be absorbed into my inequities bounced against the onyx stillborn heart caged in a tomb of bonefuckery every unanswered prayer wish or i love you a […]

first

the first time you came over we talked for hours on the couch then our lips got entangled and somehow our clothes all fell off we went back to the bedroom where you screamed out my name with every shuddering spasm with every time that you came when we woke in the morning i wanted […]

left alone

i just want to be left alone the world can go fuck itself the chatter can stop the people can turn to dust blow away into the sunrise i just want to be left alone with my thoughts my mania my pain my scars where judging eyes are blinded by the light refracted off the […]

day three, morning

she sat weeping as the cold air blowing as she tugged her (exist ten)shawl(dread) tightly over her bony shoulders as bitter tears turn to dirty smears upon her lined cheeks a chance encounter on another sleepless walk i needed coffee she needed food so now we sit under the less than hospitable stares at the […]

edge of babylon

it’s so quiet too fucking quiet i can’t think without the music on breathing in the recycled air in this empty hotel the edge of babylon. i keep going out for walks aware there is nothing to see here nothing to be here an interruption a disruption mistyped code deletes the function an empty junction […]

day two, morning

the line for the fast food restaurant stretches around the building snaking it’s way through the hotel parking lot he stands in the window freshly showered in the midst of crippling depression as he stares down at the cars he can’t sleep the bed is too soft the covers too heavy the pillows too much […]

in there

there are monkeys flinging shit from the balcony in my mind rabid little bastards with insane fever burning madness in their eyes there are ducks swimming in ever tightening spiralling doom through my endocrine system pecking at my pituitary gland like a fat beetle on the waves there is a squirrel frantically clawing at the […]

tangled

this bed is too big for you not to be next to me though, if i am honest, a twin bed would be too far away as well. all i want is to be tangled with you.

day one, morning

the time change has my head all sorts of fucked as i found myself roaming the streets at two in the morning unable to silence the words in my skull yet incapable of spilling them into the aether the area is familiar enough during the day but as i walked i found myself feeling more […]

airport elevator

we shared an elevator something in that allowed him to share his trip with me a messy break up a near restraining order restrained by covid she moved six months later she reached out he flew from new york to dallas they had a rekindling he offered to move she wasn’t ready he was slighted […]

gradual

we all stand by the water’s edge feeling as the cold slowly climbs a gradual drowning so many loved ones have disappeared beneath the waves the emptiness reflected in the placid lapping i close my eyes lock your smile into my mind as the the water tickles the tip of my nose uncaring of the […]

no one can see

some days i am a sparrow dancing from foot to foot on the branches trilling another unnecessary ode to her some days i am a storyteller rambling from metaphor to metaphor in the lines spewing another insipid tale of me i scream cut off bits to smear across the screen snarling spitting rage sorrow suffering […]

the fool ferments again: vinegar

In my new exploration in cooking, I’ve grown obsessed with uniting the five flavors in each dish. My latest facet has been focusing on acidity. The perfect counterpoint to sweet but so often neglected. Tomatoes are a great source in typical meals. But I want to move past basics. So vinegar. A two step fermentation […]

glare w/EC

the sun glared down, spiteful in the otherwise pleasant day, her malevolence seemed particularly pointed, magnified in sweltering petulance Old sleep like webs of light and tree roots tangled in my hair, yesterdays stolen petals being replaced with thorns the fish glared up, curious as to the world beyond, shapes seemed to dart in the […]

chris miller loves dark tower

his jowls quivered as he clutched the glass brought it up shakily to his rage whitened lips “as an adaptation…” i turn away unable unwilling to hear the lies rotely memorized yet false things like maggots writhing on an old log “but, as a movie…” the madness fades to a soft glow of enraptured joy […]

dreamspasms

as i slept straps seemed to stretch across my torso over my legs my arms over my throat my wrists my ankles each time my eyes opened projected images of fruit rotting medical procedures from the late eighteen-hundreds danced across the ceiling in maddeningly slowed down or oversped sequences a full spectrum nervous system attack […]

at ease

i studied philosophy until it became self evident i knew the answers to the questions posed seven left a happy accident no sadly, still no if you slide a finger inside and make the come here gesture you’ll feel it the only one that haunted me sent me down dark paths seeking the true definition […]

filth

sometimes the only thought on repeat is of simple love and joy but i lost faith in expressing either as no one cares unless they can derive their own pleasure from the words so instead i choke them down hoping for something horrible so the animals are sated the beauty is only attractive when they […]

repossess

the clergy came to repossess my demons today they stood stoically in all black little white inserts at the collar somber men of the cloth here to do serious business i told them i wasn’t home as i eyeballed them through the peephole persistent bastards tenacious even i drained nearly an entire bottle of red […]

missed

i have missed you in that missing came to realize how deeply you run in my veins so when i miss you i feel my pulse on my throat right where your mouth should be and i whisper my love into the darkness

delete later, cry for now

it is so easy to choke on the bitter rind life has in abundance to let the waves batter us until there is nothing yellowed bones broken sinking in the tar pits that seemed like solid ground. it is why when those firefly lights of happy come i will just sit smiling trying to absorb […]

picked clean

sometimes i scare myself i know i push go too far too fast get too caught up in the inner space of my cavernous skull i dart between cars going one fifteen writing poetry that will never see the page unable to slow down to lift my foot off the accelerator or my fingers from […]

a reply to an unnecessary question

half the night spent awake in that familiar shake and bake tossed and turned southern fried mental misery no matter how hard i try to shut it off i can still feel the two holes where your venom entered my system in the quiet time of the witching hour it burns its way through my […]

heavy

there are moments when the world feels too heavy but the weight starts somewhere inside my chest everything feels fractured i find myself floating in an upside down umbrella in flash flooded streets as cartoonish nightmare parodies dance along the roofs of the submerged cars kicking off alarms that bleat silently with flashing lights on […]

cupped

i just wrote you another poem as i drove it was possibly my best prose yet so i cupped my hand around a stray beam of sunshine whispered it with every nuance then let it reflect off my mirrored pupils to find it’s way to lay upon your skin

myop(i)c

i am starving hollow an echo answers when i choke down the sparse spittle from biting my lip the entire day i am miniscule an ant among giants that seek to step on my every furitive movement through the big city hatred every building is covered in mirrored glass yet when i look i see […]

i/she

she is the tender curvature of my elliptical nuance as i am the flickering tongue of her full blown inferno i am the shadow she casts as she glides across the floor as she is the moonbeams reflected over my wicked blade apart we leave nothing but wreckage where people used to be together we […]

silken sighs

it feels as if my bones were ground to dust to coat my crushed organs deep fried in a lake of fire as i am served up on a silver platter for the devil himself a stygian love letter a disaster unfurled a three course lesson in futility an abandonment of sin bound in a […]

hole

damn near rubbed a hole through the magic lamp wasted every wish on idiosyncrasies disguised in ill advised soulrattling cries draped in lies there is a hole in my sole as the streets run red with blood the steady squelch step leaving crimson splatters on this one way manual escalator leading directly to the latency […]

spun/spin

the world has spun me so many times, my sense of direction has lost all bearing/baring my lost sense of self, to a world of razor blades and lemon juice rainfall in the heart of ache there are static discharges that skim the edge as spiders lay eggs in all the things that are better […]

folded

i first knew that i had gone from simply loving you to being in love with you when you told me you save the folded chips for last i don’t have a reason just at that moment all i wanted was to hold you tightly and spill the sudden overflow across your skin

the light

the shapes in the darkness shoot forward to tear chunks of flesh from the corpse seemingly suspended by the ropes reaching up to entangle limbs to cinder block a vacant eyeless stare facing the light never to be felt again

dumbo octopi

they dart around my head shadowy octopi with fluttering ears propelling themselves through the humid air of early morning dissonance writing in duplicate seeing in triplicate lost in the waves of this ocean bearing down down down on the battered fool in desperate need of relief she comes over the horizon draped in gossamer golden […]

centrifugal

i get high write shitty poetry by myself under the moon a cloud of startear smears across the screen in the steady tapping to the emptiness that fills me in its own impossibility i get drunk compose simple sonnets to you as the room spins a vertiginous whirlpool through my brain as i weave the […]

stopping point

he wasn’t sad or angry or bitter or lonely or chagrined he wasn’t heartbroken or sick he was just done. the void has a way of insinuating itself into the most mundane days or sending a tendril to darken the brightest ones. it was then as he made a pot of coffee too late into […]

twenty one gun

the ache {rattles} through my hollow bones [scurrying] through the empty expanse within my skull faint…echoes…from another pain(another flame)another oligarchy /drenched/ in emotional sins there is no (heaven) greater than the one manifest in you there is no (hell) greater than the distance between this ache in acid etchings along my spinal collapse the sky […]

pretty mouth w/EC

o’er the fields of lavender down the cobblestone paths winding through fairy tale forests a ring of mushrooms a beam of golden light your name weighs heavy upon my tongue your smile in each and every heaving breath i wait for you to saw me in half my every instinct is to believe in your […]

shimmery

the tarnish runs too deeply on my soul to ever do anything but reflect your beauty but like a slick of oil on a serene pool sometimes the light catches me just right and i shimmer that’s how you make me feel inside shimmery and maybe a little pretty

dream woven

i lifted my head as the final line of a poem floated off my tongue a declaration so true that it willed itself into half dreamt existence i inhaled sharply to try and pull the words back so i could feel them in my mouth once more infuse them with the image of you burnt […]

slept

laconic meanderings in the heat of early autumnal reverie(flint spark tinder)heavy is the head that wears the fez tassel streaming(oft forgotten glimpses)lost hours filled with unwept tears diuretic fancies flit(permeating the tenebrae)serendipitous; the bastard sleeps: the bastard slept. rainswept/windswept/unkept/unkempt everything tossed together in the umbra of lackadaisical(semi- plausible)denialbilities a translucent redundancy hums at the edge […]

aspic

the spastic aspic flailing in the ill fitting mold molded to his ill fitting sense of self-preservation preserved in the meaty brine suspended in his disbelief failing organs organically organized in the savory slop a buffet of buttery buffering fluttering fluffily static images that once smoothly streamed now the reel to real reels as the […]

anenome

some days i am my own worst anenome waiting patiently for the sun to unfurl my petals knowing in the furitive furling of my inexplicable dismay the enemy of my anenome is really me

lemon scented hellfire

i woke up feeling like a balloon knotting itself because of leaky conditions torn between maintaining shape or flying loose across the skies stuck in the incidental half thought out measures between twisted like a balloon sculpture in the shaky hand writing of a non-believer scribbling scripture to keep the devil unaware i am coming […]

she hates me

she sent me a message in the middle of the night (she hates me she misses me she loves me) she went on about how her finger wasn’t the same she misses the different grain of my rougher tip she cannot read my words but now sees them in a hundred other poetic lines (she […]

dreamschism

the morning is still heavy but not in a crushing way more in that pregnant pause way that i almost wonder if i woke or if this is a precursor to some dreamschism the edges don’t mesh from dream to reality or my adventure in the land of nod in dream we walked down hallways […]

lavender sun

i drive down the streets at a hundred miles an hour with my arm hanging out the window painting the city with my amethyst innocuosity singing at the top of my lungs as a cloud of joy radiates like a comet tail behind me a heart full of you a mind full of words too […]

coffee with demons

most days the world at large for me can be summed up with two separate time zones pre-dawn promises in which all offers for my soul will be considered for the right deal and after she wakes up to be reminded that my soul isn’t mine to offer no matter how tempting the trade so […]

the conductor and the fool

she kept shoveling coal into his combustible engine sweat running in rivulets through the black dust on her ample chest she ran her pink tongue over every secret unfurling the knots of rope that made up his coarse recollections of anyone before so concerned were they both in their own failings they couldn’t recognize those […]

breeze

did you hear that just then drifting joyously on the breeze as it ruffled your hair? that was me whispering i love you as i drive down the street with music too loud and you filling my kind with your intoxicating smile i have a full tank of gas, a thousand songs and a headful […]

a tulip in decline

our love was a tulip bulb carefully planted in the fall nurtured through friendship during the long cold months until one day i witnessed it sprout within her gaze every chance i had to kiss her as the plant flourished to fill her iris with soft pink petals thriving under our affectionate care like all […]

frayed wisps

emotions are spiders haunting the webs within our minds silent still shadows in the dark corners of introspective mist feeling for the slightest remembrance before unleashing hellish watercolors to tint the day’s malaise grotesquely swollen some skitter moribundly overfed on the negative array that constantly contorts the spinal ambiguities until all the threads have become […]

dasein-ersatz

a sense of confusion sweeps across my paper maché wombnestle, a shuddering wave plays along the straight curve of my dasein-ersatz can you hear my heartbeat’s morose morse code tapping into the aether, the burlap sense of self calling in stutters and stops to your subtle nocturne or is this just a case of the […]

concatenation of perfection

to my mind she was a series of non sequiturs because perfection is a stand alone trait even if her perfections stretched beyond the typical scope inherent in mortals as i fell in love with each facet bound in beauty like dream captured in amber in the very randomness of her concatenation there is a […]

what else?

the best thing about being no one is you can write whatever the fuck you want without worrying about pretext so when i say i am torn between wanting to do nothing but kiss you for an entire evening with pure hunger and tearing off your panties and taking you from behind with no words […]

lush spasms

she captured secret lightning hiding the discharge in mason jars squirrelled away in every nook or cranny she never did say why she hoarded the crackling forks of purple hued dissonance or where she even got them but once she kissed me after a bottle of wine and i still have a faint scar on […]

poetic bliss (w/EC)

It’s not me I’m worried about, she screams, i pull out of her embrace, let loose a spray of ink across her unstained flesh, i scream as well, through tears, desperate to read the hidden images before it all fades away, her blue lips part in a smile that deepens the mystery it’s poetry and […]

soon forgotten

the poets sit at a table fellating each other while rolling their eyes smoking cigarettes passing silent judgement while spewing lies bunch of sycophantic swine with no regard for truth less for beauty pouring wine across the sheet pretending they are real poets when they have never known more than a moment’s misfortune never felt […]

lighthouse lamentation

how long did i sit sojourn in this cracked lighthouse manning the rocky shore leading ships safely with crew and cargo to the nearest port? penning letters that were never intended to be sent to a her that never intended to read them the gulls the only company as the waves ceaselessly slap the stones. […]

a thousand

there are crevices in your soul that call to me secret places where no one else has been hidden spots groves of splendor where you pull leaves off flowers far from prying eyes in my longing to learn your classified currents to navigate your silent deflections i lose myself in the simple affection infectious the […]

calcified

self manufactured silence as the miles tick ever downward to a destination an ending the horizon seems just as far out of reach as it always has when the city vanishes all that remains are the calcified concrete overpasses spread like the bones of leviathan under the dim light of an ever diminshed sun i […]

permanent snooze

some mornings the alarm is the harbinger of hellish defaults the indifferent screams of the bill collectors digitized to slap the still dreaming hippocampus into fraught wakefulness a steel toed boot nudging the limp limbics into a perpetual state of anxious motion this morning it was your voice whispering love through dream through the pillow […]

bath

i yearn to be the flame on the candle that sends shadows to play upon your naked flesh yearn to be the bubbles clinging to your every heavenly curve the hot water gently carressing every hidden fold of you with my embrace

binary

she lavished my flesh in slow kisses until i was draped in fineries undreamt once suitably attired she slowly lowered the piece de resistance upon my desperate desire as the flames crept casting shadows of light reflected in our locked binary singularity

phantom trails

i was driving through an area i hadn’t been to in a long time came from a different direction didn’t recognize the sights but as i was driving i felt your hand high on my thigh i could taste the vodka and smoke on your lips as we frantically kissed at every stoplight or stop […]

of wheat and weeping wounds

the sun rises impaling the sky with golden flames to strike direct the heart of night spread across in ebon tides an ominous warning threats as yet unfulfilled fade into the aether frightened wisps wrapped in silence ensconced in dream i find myself standing in brown fields of wheat swaying though i feel no wind […]

droplets (w/EC)

It didn’t even hurt right away and I wasn’t sure if that’s because of the numbing sensation of regular living or if I was stupidly unprepared Mesmerized, I watched the droplets collect and become heavy with disdain as I held my heart high and they fell with a shameless splash. a good cut, deep, those […]

sip

the ocean or the desert can kill you by dehydration but the desert doesn’t act nearly as fucking smug about it there is a lesson in that but i am too thirsty to see it drowning in whiskey yet always thirsty for another sip i gave up drinking things that just make me more thirsty […]

shadows dance

days and days go by where the only reason to move is the image of her burned bright into my mind the world is a toxic waste belching black smoke to choke down the rejoinders of joy all it takes is that bottomless brown refraction to keep it all in a seeming semblance of order […]

meal worms

meal worms in the flour wriggling fat yellow meal worms the color of old bones sticking up from the ground they curl into tight balls the moment they hit the sizzling olive oil with crispy garlic little hopping old mucus colored tires the world is filled with meal worms maggots writhing in the underbelly of […]

death rattle orgasm

becoming less poet writing ignored odes to the she that smiles yet the impact is left wanting as her mind tears through the lines mechanically seeking the implications unstated clearly in simple love more a bee seeking the proper pollen to coat the quiil possibly earning a chance for a night of suicidal indulgence with […]

my baby

we once made love like lava we made love under a bookcase her lips were sweet as guava her panties made of frilly lace her sweat raced down her spine my tongue ran in quick pursuit ain’t no lady nearly half as fine not princess nor one of ill repute my baby screams loud my […]

finalmente una fine

there are cracks in my facade where the real me pours out like the antithesis of light(the dark spatter of gray matter braised and battered by aloofly affluent chefs fool tartar with lemongrass clippings on a bed marinated in the finest longing)beams of razored emptiness in the porcelain mask painted smile flaking to the floor(the […]

bruised light

she painted self portraits though every one i saw looked nothing like her, sure the shape of her nose, the sharp arching eyebrow here, the down turned lip there she would paint hurriedly toss it to the floor to dry as the next began to form on the canvas, yet each one seemed farther removed […]

deciphered landscapes (w/EC)

I have bent like the wildflower fields under the windy darkest night. I have broken everything and had to put it back together. I’m aware we have never crossed paths. Yet I’m caught by the shore of your lips and the asylum of your caresses. We should count the poems we write and our day […]

painqueries

aerosol solutions to microscopic myopics the hiss of pressurized spray dissipating in the murky sunlight filtered through the fingerprint smudged windows offering a view to a world apart skin particulates dust motes on the stale air hanging serenity suspended in the invisible threads woven by eighth dimensional spiders irradiated blights with unblinking eyes above serrated […]

daredevil

he didn’t see himself as a daredevil though he rode a rocket propelled motorcycle through the air over canyons in his red white and blue jumpsuit the stars on his shoulder pads as well as in his eyes addicted to the cheers the fame the pain pills that allowed him to lace up his special […]

spilled

i spilled myself across the cobblestones in front of her hoping that somewhere in the messy metaphors she would find something pretty she dipped her finger in my everything swirling the colors before licking her finger with an expression of curious wonderment her eyebrow arched as she looked at me with a new understanding written […]

chalkdust lovewhimpers

broken glass diamonds on the damp concrete acidic dissonance in early morning emptiness hooves on cobblestone clopping rapture in unregistered fear there is a raptor roosted between the immobile third eyelids gazing blankly over the dim dismalities homespun degeneracies spasming in time with rippling feathers who broke the glass? left it scattered on the steamrolled […]

heartflaked lattices

his heart a paper lantern left untethered to the mortal coil drifting upon the thermals ever higher towards yon frigid misery what light beckons from the frozen heart of sorrow’s bastard impossible heartflaked lattices glistening with pure impurities –a pause; rippled sighs, from painted mouths; along the sharp edge of ignoble dismay– she was draped […]

second demons

second tries are invitations to repeat past mistakes those things that loiter just behind rational thought reminders dawdling in the shadow of actions so the only time i make another attempt is as the bartender pours three fingers of whiskey as the whiskey from the night before is clawing the inside of my brain to […]

shapes

she took my crease and smoothed it out but some creases are old so they eventually reshape i have been bent into the shape of a crane so many times i have to fight the urge to sweep low across the water as the sun rises to the east once i was a foil swan […]

snowball’s chance

people say — there isn’t a snowball’s chance in hell as if it is a bad thing but to me the idea of a snowball wanting so badly to attempt a trip to hell is a greek tragedy that opens up in my mind sentient flakes united in the hope of the perilous journey into […]

devilled fool

i admit i have my own issues around my neck rusted chains with an anchor pulling me into the hell always open beneath my vans but look at yourself in the mirror try to convince yourself when i took your breath away with every kiss with every lick every time my hands rolled over your […]

the fools reads about himself and cries

loving someone with anxiety This article destroyed me this morning. This is me. I am broken and worthless. I am not alone in my loneliness and I have sobbed all morning. It doesn’t help knowing I am like this. It doesn’t help anyone that falls into the fool’s world. I’m sorry. I love you. And […]

nest

today as you sleep, i stare at the ceiling pondering the sea salt crystals on your lovely hands as they dig through the crates of my every unspoken thought the hard tangle of roots writhing just under the flesh the forks of lightning dancing within your eyes as you seek the hidden words in every […]

dreamkisses

as exhaustion sweeps through my weary mind the darkness pulls me deeper into its embrace you ripple through my mind with sparks of electricity teasing my quickening pulse as i long to fall asleep clutching you instead of this pillow that soaks in the dreamkisses meant for your lips alone

insouciance

a malaise of insouciance lays over my being solemn as spinning prayer wheels in a brightly painted candlelit cave on the side of a snowy mountain unseen by man in centuries the loa, the spirits demons, angels, monsters all creep about the insolent indifference that shines in prismatic apathy across crystal bones and belabored sighs […]