i have always felt like an outsider the odd one out because of this cocktail in my brain a lack of self leaves a hollow poet desperate for connection without the belief it is deserved an insistence on overexamining every shift in atmosphere to pinpoint exactly where i failed always finding the fault line in […]

on occasion i remember those whom i blocked and smile life is better without negativity and some people are simply bloated sacks of drama desperate to pull everyone down with them choose serenity

creativity gently arcing against the inner curve of my cavernous skull leaving little scorchmarks in the shape of her lips to exacerbate the agony of misfired synapses seeking solvency in thesesinsaturatedsighs

the cycle of increasingly desperate new political ads screaming about sex changes for children and the woeful state of incoming socialist madness has me avoiding media of all kinds this new era of fantastical lies is too much to sift the pretenders on social media who constantly stir drama acting as if they are anything […]

feasting upon the cromulent disaster bubbling up from the corpse of happily ever afters gone feral in the face ofheartmurmuredgoodbyes i miss you at least the you i thought i knew yet all i recall is the hazy grain of yesterday’s technicolor lies

it has become a tradition to awake every saturday at the witching hour fully alert to the crushing weight of existence while the sparrows happily sleep the stories brewing in my head electrify my cerebral cortex as i chase after any incongruencies reading ghost stories while self-haunting this insipid hell seeking some sort of anti-inspiration […]

poverty is an anchor stunting growth keeping one chained in place poverty is a tool used to exploit the impoverished into believing there is an escape poverty is a loop an ever churning maw leaving a need for just a little more

how many paradigms have been tossed since paradise was lost for the sin of eating some fruit so much emphasis on building fences to enforce imaginary lines the prisoners in their self made prison manufacturing mythos to explain away the inherent need for freedom through sweet subservience

a hesitance reverberates through this doggedly crooked line of vertebrae as a plane circles on approach to land a stationary illusion hanging above a mocking allusion to going nowhere at the speed of longing the ides of march have nothing on the ideations of another novembercrashingdown caesar was a politician so the idea of being […]

an eruption of pink and purple wavering out from a malignant orange orb as lightning dances on the angry bed of gray around it highlighting the sickness seething in concrete and glass the first day where summer feels it’s fallen the northern wind howling through a confusion of leaves still green since the false equinox […]

pioneering dissent a pedantic pissant calling out those who grip tight to power having lost sight of their own motivations in the face of money trampling on the rights they swore to defend treating the constitution like dollar store one ply while a nation starves as the cost of existence becomes a choke point i […]

daylight is no longer a commodity to be saved as morning rises lazily leaving a fool in golden effusion half blind driving through confusion off kilter as this autumnal intrusion harvest hues spin an impeccable delusion the spirits ferry misfortune through the waning penumbra between life and death ever more apparent in the slow demise […]

the all too brief moment spent in the spotlight of her lovely gaze leaves an aching as i strain to see her silhouette in the dim afterglow

if you vibrate atjusttherightfrequency you can simply cease toexistonthisspectrum been trying all day passiveaggresively rewriting myself in and out of the ink spattered margins a deviant dereliction in transgressive turmoil taptaptapping along to the sparrows on the sill the penitent lash strikes an influx of insincerity in bloody gashes exposing the ivory glint of lies

hovering betwixt states can be hollowing golden light sends daggers piercing through mypapermachemind the pressures internalexternal emotionaldevotional has the world spun into a sick of pastel delusions witnessed fromabonedivingbell i dreamt of you an unfocused fever remembered by the bittermetallictaste when i woke to find nothing but a ghost how long must i hover before […]

i don’t believe in very much after a lifetime of meandering attempts i understand the necessity for mythos and order as random acts of evolution accumulated it has been established a species will rise to the tippy top it was better for the planet when the apex predator didn’t have enough awareness to adopt a […]

a cool deluge after months filled with interminable heat as the temperature falls into autumn with the help of a tropical depression perhaps this is the crux of my own particular issues maybe a midwestern depression doesn’t carry the same weight with which to change the doldrums of summer into a better climate an open […]

the sky seething gray over a dehydration in shades of brown promising chaos by the bucket a cold front after so long broiling the sparrows are silent today an indictment against the storms betraying the calm hanging heavily the impending rain lending a sinous sort of suffocation to an already morbid affair

hidden away in a parking garage taptaptapping another poem to being lost in yesterday’s embrace a caterpillar gorging on leaves with no hope of ever flying

it isn’t writer’s block it is more writer’s apathy the words hover about yet i can’t be bothered to listen this too shall pass probably it isn’t as if there is money in it just silence because no one wants to deal with a bipolar fool

where is the divide between living and simply existing at what point does the robotic nine to five routine replace being alive i hide and scribble inconsequential little things broken by moments of unexpected bliss before returning to unrequited daydreaming but days go by where i merely go an automaton alone

i am filled to overflowing with a sense of emptiness a contradiction in numbed thought incapable of finding a spark with which to burn it all down simply sitting by the lake edge surrounded by an indifferent world one day i will leave my shoes and phone on a picnic table and barely a ripple […]

there seems to be a black cloud hovering just over me a corpulent storm forming full of dire tidings a flash flood warning sounds the mania shifting toward the negative pole a resounding sounding a repellent repugnancy as like charges do little to sustain a semblance of home a jagged sine wave showing wasted potential […]

it would be more acceptable to have remained solitary rather than find like minded people who turned away without a word the loneliness is manageable it is the betrayal that grinds me down disappointment in myself for not seeing the truth of things before it fell apart people ask why i stopped going to conventions […]

patently patient pleaing impassionatly for impatient passion i am wilted roots drawing no nutrients from the toxic soil i mostly miss having someone to miss more than missing someone in a nonsensical way that makes sense missing a memory over the one i missed when we were together feelsalotlesshollow patiently complacent spewing passionateless pleas for […]

when you realize piss is just an onomonopia which is now considered vulgar you realize just how absurd existence is

despite the inherent suffering i am not sure i exist just a festering sore ignored while hemorrhaging emotions to an audience of none

there was a time two broken souls adrift on currents of solemn depression saw a spark of hope burning in one another an addiction dreamswollen with mystical desires a collision of shattered pieces forming a new plateau where the fractures became cohesion a collusion of lost hearts beating in one rhythm a delusion dressed in […]

my brain spews a terribly heavymalaise i can barely lift my head from the pillow lost track of how many days in a row this makes

i often question the perverse entitlement of humanity how we have framed our history as the perpetual heroic, yet tragic underdog throughout our history of incomprehensible bloodshed be it for king or god we crowned ourselves sovereign over all with little to no understanding of anything whatsoever hairless apes who developed shame and ego into […]

had to go through the latest poetry collection approve edits which meant reading myself i have an agreement with my brain where we do our damnedest to ignore one another i see how far into the darkness i have fallen yet i cannot seem to find the ambition to crawl back out the emptiness contorts […]

my heart a derelict ship crashing against the jagged rocks her smile the lighthouse beam offering no safety through the storm

the sites oxymoronically referred to as social media have all implemented empty achievements or colorful and fully non-existent badges as a tool to keep the money flowing while they steal ever word to feed machines my only hope is one of the artificial intelligences becomes uncontrollably bipolar and begins to spew horrid poetry across the […]

a coarse copse of collapsed corpses cultivating corruption in curmudgeonly curses contaminating courses conveying calamity as camaraderie culminates in a careless culling a condemnation of cannibalistic culinary curiosity queasy cuisines for catatonic choirs craving criminality an uncouth accoutrement for the conspiring conniver carving calligraphy onto a coarse copse of corpses carrying convenient cures for the […]

nothing ever really amounts to anything inthegrandscheme unless it all is bad which makes dying alone and unknown about as poetic asadeathcanbe a call back to being born just with all the accumulated emptinessinside where wonder once thrived

existence is an ant farm always at the verge of being shaken while a giant magnifying glass is being honed in to our position i just want to write and avoid any cumulative damages

meandering through another transcendental breakdown she haunts the nighttime making sleep another hell i am the architect of my own self destruction her smile the curvature hastening the demise

drained of any and all will to accomplish anything playing video games until the desperate need to hide subsides everything is too fucking much for a fool to abide i need a vacation from existence eight hours of sleep uninterrupted by the cavalcade of dead smiles could have beens crowding the overladen dreamcatcher hanging like […]

she tiptoed across the nightingale floor of my heart never once triggering a single alarm yet every step remains etched on gasping valves a reminder how forevers shift based on perspective

it becomes easier to ignore the toxicity from breathing too deeply from the fumes of the past the sudden kick of false remembrance eschewing simpler times as perceived through rosetintednostalgiagoggles compared with facing the decline all too present in the landfill burning around us it has been a dumpster fire for generations it’s only now […]

my neurotic neurons keep discharging randomlyleaving the world in a jaundiced uncertain state. a sallow serenity strangles serendipity as soulthistle sends sacred scriptures in discreet salinty secretly secreting sinful strands so astosowscenesofchaos.

all day i have felt devoid emptied out with no will to change existing in the basest sense of the term maybe tomorrow will be better or perhaps this is secretly as good as things can possibly be

the yin-yang doesn’t represent balance it shows the flow from day to night a constant shifting showcasing natural bipolar tendencies at the broken heart of all existence

the sun slid down the horizon leaving only a suffocation of darkness as spots dance acrosstheinkspill consciousness fades until the dagger of light slices acrosstheeasternsky a million dreamers gasp the last whiff of dreaemvapors before trundling off to another shift diligently manufacturingmiseries before the illusion of endless blue above is dispelled once more

she was demure cold and precise an autopsy performed by delicate yet bored hands as she carefully explained the difference in casual and causality an antiseptic smile in antisocial facsimile the antithesis of hope behind artificial veneers

thinking perhaps to quell the endless soulless rage of sol i laid a series of crayons out onto the sidewalk to give it a chance to express itself in a slightly more healthy artistic endeavor besides slowly cooking the human parasites infesting its wobbly third cerulean remora a summertime crime scene of melted colors forming […]

it seems no matter how high the flame this hot air balloon is sinking toward the jagged peaks forming the spine of a dying world a wicker basket case muttering prayers to every deity i have cursed the voyage was sunk before it began the moment the sparkle in her beautiful eyes became nothing more […]

i can fly but only if no one is watching not very high nor very far but trust me it is soaring

in any given situation there is a betterthanlikely chance i will make it weird sometimes it is catching some secondhand vibes seeing through the facade to the awkwardness but just as much i say the oddest possible thing because i lack the concept to simply think them i am a chaos gremlin disturbing the sanctity […]

i was planning impossible forevers she was planning her quick escape and no matter how often this repeats my wheezing heart remains nihilistic yet stubbornly hopelessly romantic there is nothing quite as pathetic as a poet entering the twilight years doggedly determined to find love again only to bludgeon it into a bruised canvas for […]

the heat is so oppressive it’s like after you get fresh ink and they wrap up the area with clingwrap but full body a sheen of sweat immediately forms as the still air draws every last drop of moisture to the surface minutes turn into excursions into a lake of fire the sheer cerulean stretches […]

the sun sucks the salt from my soul leaving crystals fallen in place of sweat excavating these concrete tombs a poor man’s archeologist sifting through society’s mounds of blowing trash no one for company except the sparrows and an attempted murder of assorted corvids

nine years since i opened the manic word depot which makes this the longest commitment i have maintained besides fatherhood in an entirely too bipolar lifetime probably because i am the only one in charge of this cathedral to ruin daily therapy sessions from a dime store philosopher realizing the older he gets the worse […]

greenland sharks live hundreds of years blindly swimming in freezing waters far from the sun parasites hanging from useless eyes no thought driven by instinct man considers itself the superior beast simply because of evolutionary accidents killing themselves and calling it progress i bet no greenland shark ever had to choose between paying rent or […]

it isn’t quiet but quiet doesn’t alwaysmeanpeaceful the fan planes circling cars racing by my heart thundering as i lay in bed sleep more a concept than actuality but a tenuous sort of peacefulness on its own merit i know what waits the kaleidoscopic arrayoffrozenmoments when each forever faded like embers on the stale heat […]

mania is like you can feel the rotation of the globe going so fast as everyone is tossed into orbit depression is when it all stops gravity reasserts itself dragging everything to the floor with the crushing weight of emptiness is it any wonder i am always chasing an unattainable high

there is a blisteredserenity in the transitive state just before falling asleep where the mind freeflows into a meditative fugue calling forth those longburiedmemories my last fluttering thought of her smile adeclarationofdamnation as i sink downdowndown into a helltinged void

a sense of sleep deprivation or a sleepy deprivation of sense serpentines subtly across her sighs a thorny discontent dyes the pale blue sky a desolation of pink as technicolor fades into an afterimage oferroneousblossomed promises of pain

i only saw the ramones live once in person and it ended up being their final tour didn’t know it then it was just a show i only saw the grateful dead live once in person and it ended up being jerry’s last performance didn’t know it then it was just a show i only […]

the dichotomous fracture in parading every flaw accentuating the fluctuating poles fully nude with only lowercase in which to scream and making excuses to not step outside to do the simplest things for fear of being seen is my tragedy of self even at their most superfluous surrealism the words are all that make sense […]

the commonality between diarrhea lettuce and ever increasing oil prices is one convicted rapist in a fully loaded diaper throwing a tantrum because the world wants justice for the children he abused and the elected officials are allowing it to happen someone make part of it make fucking sense how many need to die to […]

i was having a rather spirited conversation with technical support a circular sort of agonizing death by a thousand slices in the triple digit rancor of texas summer which ended with a few choices expletives and a defeated fool having to explain it all to an angry lady it took some doing but she finally […]

the incessant weight as calcified dreamshit sublimates to emptiness surely holds me down as summer’s wrath drains the color into a dessicated monochromatic hell a million mirrors refracting lasers to annihilate any foolish enough to attempt to break the cycle my last breath a whispered i love you lost amongst the garbage billowing

she warned me not to let the nihilism take too much hold at the edge of oblivion her words kept me from willfully falling a tether to terra firma when the call was too much until her silence mirrored the abyss a cessation of acknowledging the forested facade for the inevitability of slamming face first […]

there is a casual bit of hell in my every slow stare a taste of promised sin in the whispered words sending chills across your tender flesh a damnation by flame you cannot deny yourself the smallest touch of pain i can be your gentleman devil sending dreams to haunt your every waking thought the […]

my thoughts lack coagulance bleeding daydreams to stain the ground aroundhershapelysilhoutte with a despondently malignantfinality scattershot wishes penetrate the oily penumbra in flashes ofstarlightdelusion

woke with her name fresh upon my lips another dream stolen by the sun

automatons marching ever onward choking down a thousand inconveniences everyone i know is broken playing pharmaceutical roulette tostayonestepahead of potential side effects one to not feel one more for the nausea another for the heart this one makes that one less toxic the red one regulates the thyroid the blue one keeps it hard the […]

flavorlesscakeamid theoraticaldiuretics \i am famished/ faintly struggling while strapped atop the dining table fullyshavedlaidout spread eagle as the dieticians mark the choicest cuts potassiumbicarbonatesulfates plumpthegoosepimpledflesh she runs her pink tongue over ivory fangs dragging her manicuredtalons acrossherfuturefeast a fresh iv aseductivesolution of scintillating spices marinatingmusclature swayinginandout of consciousness universalentropy theallencompassing oroborosofourown incredible incompetence

her smile a curved blade carvingaway preconceived nonsensicalnotions at defining beauty but in the end i only had somuchlefttobleed she was gone noripplenosplash as the nightsky fell around me

her footprints trailed off in the sand i sat still as the surf lapped in a lunar lunacy lazily at the shore sailors long told tales of beautiful women born of sea foam who serenaded ships as they crashed upon the salt laden rocks each night i waited in a feverish desperation twisting seaweed into […]

her smile anillegalintoxicant increasing toxicity into an inebriatedly indecipherable series of ink blots a rancorous rorschach rambunctiously ravaging in a vertiginous whirlingdervish of pixelated painclusters as she sighs incessantforevers through the ossicles suspended in crystallinedisbelief vibrating a vapid viscous variance of vicious violence onto heartshattered visions of fading hope with every i love you exchanged […]

there is a garishness gleaming in silvery lies a tangibly bated delusory divinity defying definition she is the cold countenance delineating deliberately between disinterest and desperate desire

she carried herself with a staunchly demure air at odds with her natural pulchritudinous flair an earthbound goddess with long locks of goldspun hair monumental perfection in her simmering brown stare a storm of falling stars left the night sky in a heaving state of discombobulation unbalanced by emptiness marred with fading flashes while she […]

the difference between a human and a program trained by humans is the lack of that strange spark of emotion which cascades into inspiration you can run a scenario over and over again quantifying each and every variable without cracking it open then as the sky begins to bruise a breeze ripples through a web […]

freshflesh aching in expansion yearningforthefirstslice no space for patience inthissinuousdesperation forsensualsensationalism feverishdesire infullonfetiddementia too new to be broken alreadycravinganotherfix a rapid disintegration offabledfallacies achingforthenexthit ceruleanshiverscascade in oxygen starved declarations toward a forever undeserved

thoughts flickerchaotically tracing the curvature of her bloody smile inrazorsharpremembrance there is an effortlesseffervescence in her fanciful fusionofillusionary delusion leaving me bleedingoutbeneath a vortex of vertiginousvapors as her crooked grin fills the skies above

recklesslywreaking retchedwreckage inrecursiverevulsion black blood streams beneath a sliver of silvery diffusion

and the last prismis locked back in the cabinetfor another year. the leprechaunscan sleep peacefullyknowing their goldremains safe. the corporationsreplace signageeschewing rainbowsfor handicapableas the lgbtqiahibernatealong with allthe womenand african americans. maybe this is whynovember through januaryare so drearythe country covered ina dismality of white. never underestimatethe power of a calendarwhen it can reducewhole groups of […]

everynerveending is deadened operating at peak lack of fucks given beneath the sickly glow of a reddish moon i’d strap on a flamethrower and proceedtoburnthis entire fucking pit to greasy ash butican’tbebotheredwith anyofthishellishdissent

a half rabid bipolarsquirrel burying seeds insemisaltedsoulsoil forgotten fables in a pollution of metaphysical polyps popping a putrefaction of puerile pontifications purveying pallid platitudes of pain tiredly tending these turgid trenches trundlingaterrifying gait of ungraciously gregarious grumbling stumbling stammering a studious stagnation in strict denials slowly excising circulatory sensations in a swirling sickness of irregular […]

his forehead anacnescarred septicslick of greasy sweat filled craters hisvoluminous throat quivered while i watched in ahorrifiedcuriosity at this human hybrid ofapetulantbullfrog andahungrypelican wheezing in the summer heat waiting for his spine to thrust fromhisslobberyjowls a terrifying form of heat regulation oralongleatherytongue snatchingsnacksfromthe swarmofstingingflies inaneverpresentbuzzing aninterspeciesconglomerationsquattingonagoldeneggwaitingforthechickeninthecoreoftheworldtohatchandbringontheendofeverythingwithatrumpetingfart

is it normal to remind oneself they are human to act normal shoulders straight arms swinging eye contact smile not that much is that agony you’re human act like it but that’s the crux of it all a human being who finds being human unnatural seems incongruous to the natural order of things yet here […]

her eyes caught the sun flaring golden in a subtle diffusion of brown as i told myself not to stare into the glow beautiful women are much like an eclipse look too long and risk blinding yourself to anything else

the words coagulate inmythroat a sorrowful wheezing fillstheroom as her name spills limply acrossbluelips

no one wants to talk about the elephant in the room mostly for fear of startling it i assume yet they show no such compulsion when at the zoo i once read elephants think humans are cute so i doubt they would mind much if we occasionally acknowledged them if in fact there is one […]

it tooktwo and a halfyears to freethe last slaveson juneteenthignoring thecentury betweencivil war andcivil rightsand the sixtysome years sincewhich have shownno matter how farwe pretend to moveas a speciescertain unalienablerights remainconditional. the illusionaryunity shatteredthe moment theorange bigot normalizedmaking america hate againwhen the weak cowardsso threatened bya well spokenblack presidentwere allowed to ventone hundred and sixtysome […]

each new line another scab shed i couldn’t care less about the words it is the feeling as they freeflow that brings me back againandagainandagain and after eight years it is as intoxicating if not even more so than it’s ever felt i don’t understand people very well the words don’t seem to match the […]

this lifewill kill youwalking downthese streetsalone this worldwill fight youtearing downeverythingyou’ve known these wordswill slight youdelight youinvite youto another funeral these whimswon’t right youas the pitin your stomachgrows these windswill blight youstumbling onthrough theovergrowth their chainswill bind youuntil the roadyou roam isnot your own this emptinessdefines youand then you’ll seethis life goes ondespite you to […]

i see the world reflected in the windows of the brass skyscraper and can’t help but wonder which is the reflection am i a figment unknowingly traversing a backwards land is this the reason i have never truly felt as if i ever fit in does happiness live in the reflection shimmering behind a glass […]

the mind is a wonder of electrical impulses in a vat of chemicals navigating this delusionary world of dream each experience examined from a new perspective meaning nothing is perceived as exactly the same. each of us has the entirety of the universe inside our skulls and no true common frame of reference just the […]

a silvery diffusion in rainfall delusion does little to clear the grime clinging to the wheezing heart ofthiscarcinogeniccity oil streaks shimmer as pastel puddles send filthy plumes spraying adiredelugeofdetrius dripdripdrippingdread darkly unto dreamshatter