dragon

the dragon swims barely contained on the blackened spoon clenched between shaking fingers as the lighter dances in the fetid air before it is sucked up through a vacuum lashing out at this new hypodermic cage plunger pressed air bubbles displaced no need to disinfect nothing could survive the pockmarks and filth covering every inch […]

billy shakes

the eyes being the windows to the soul is another example of shakespearean inadequacy or idiocy. unless hell is the soil of my shattered soulscape good old billy shakes is a bald faced fucking liar. the only semblance of beauty to be seen in my monstrous gaze is you reflected back.

self portrait as reflected in oblivion’s empty gaze

it is in this hollowboned depression that oblivion sings the sweetest whispering in the cold darkness pooled inside this wicker man filled to bursting with icy insignificance too many hours lost in a month where realizations still spark acrid bitterness on my talented tongue where it was made apparent there is nothing to be here […]

well aware

my soul is one dimensional when viewed from this three dimensional plane of plain pain and panic stricken desolation my heart is wheezing black tar through constricted vessels of vacant adoration seized in rigorous illusionary half palpations you do not have to remind me i am nothing with your callous slights i am well aware […]

seven am suicidals

the light in the room dimmed as i looked out the sunlight diffusion gradually pulling the deep purple into static blue shifted to a melange of pink hued darknesses there is a weight to this salmon haze a heaviness breaking over the rooftops trickling turgidly down the streets a dripping of cloying syrupy madness in […]

a flaw

i’ve long since cast away the foolish dreams and childish aspirations focusing instead on the lackadaisical melanoma of melancholia i am a paper boat soaked through disintegrating on the swollen sewers of guilt ridden self-loathing saturated streams of fetid filth longing to burn a sliver of sodium in your everflowing fountain of beauty to settle […]

painskitters

less compartmentalizing more mental desterilization thoughts that rattle behind the locked doors buried in the deepest darkest cobweb filled corridors in my mind the tarnished padlocks click open to fall heavily to the spongey gray floor letting loose the howls as the damned chorus of the past scrambles down my fragile sense of unbeing circling […]

it isn’t that

it isn’t that i cant get out of my own head it’s that the part i got stuck in was one i swore that i would avoid now it is all that pummels me in the silence that punctures my inner ear an unloving embrace squeezing too tight to my throat

two more hours

fell asleep on a mobius strip of wrong sides so no matter how i were to finally awaken the day was truly well and fucked the coffee still dripped slowly the only percolation in my dingy place as i force myself to leave the cave to enter a world of dreamy disillusion the only words […]

pointless

i spent two hours compiling a new collection reading my own words and i feel so goddamned broken because the words haven’t changed that pain is still this pain and i don’t understand why it never abates why i can never lose the weight of an ocean of black tar tears. and the man on […]

ink swells beneath my ugly

i never begged you to love me because i was too busy begging you to treat me as simply a human being beaten down by a lack of considerations the fact i had to beg at all shows how one sided the entirety encapsulating our accident truly was sad puppy eyes and maternal scarring left […]

the sun came out for no goddamned reason

we lay together in a tangle of legs as the rains hit the glass our hearts regulated metronomically as one my eyes open i reach out to feel your warmth pull you in closer but the bed is empty an expanse stretching from my burgeoning wave of impending sorrows each time i close my fitful […]

meh.

this constant feeling of trenchlike pressure clamped in barb wire and rusted iron bands around my head is slowly driving me insane(r) i cannot stop contemplating my escape the need for relief yelling in the dead center of this vortex of agonized dizziness i need a pickaxe or a cordless drill with diamond tipped bits […]

crab

i am a hermit crab uncomfortable in this too large skull seeking some sort of sanctuary from the storms that rage without reflecting the tsunami raging within i need a different shell to keep my ragged apologies and need to please in check a hobo hopping trains that lead to anywhere but here headed to […]

steel wool and fireants

when i moved to texas it was in the middle of thirty straight over one hundred degree days i was pulling a u-haul sixteen hours across country with the devil’s breath blowing constantly across the featureless land road hypnosis and salt flecked lips feverish in thirst watching the miles tick as i looked for the […]

negative bolt

the emptiness swirls in my cranial cavern pulsating aches spill in synchronicitized marrowdeep bemoaning i am lesser today than i was yesterday the painrattles chose angular sobs to remind me in lucid loss of lividity i have nothing in my pockets but a swell of dreamkisses snatched from morning awakening and soft smiles of peace […]

gravel

he sitson edgethe screamingof the birdswhite noisestaticcoursing throughhis collapsefalling inupon himselfgaining masslosingdefinitionworn downsmoothed outby the riverforever windingover hisgravel soulan aquariumfilledwith upsidedownfish belliesbobbing at thesurface tensionbarely keepinghim constrainedin shape

sisyphus

camus asked the worldto imaginesisyphus happybut happinessisn’t a partof the comfortinherent inrepetitive actioni prefer toimagine sisyphuscontented in hisdaily strugglethe knowledgethat everything we dois eventuallyanother incomprehensiblehabitual actretracing stepswell worn scarsacross our heartsrunning fingersover cardiac nervesexciting palpatationsrepeatingself-destructiveidiocies becauseman never learnsan oroboros ofself defeatseeking its own tailto pacifythe urges.

apathetic

my fight or flight has grown apathetic every minor inconvenience greeted with a shakespearean sigh to give a fuck or to not give a fuck, that is the dilemma i was not born skinless bare nerves in a sandstorm but life has a way of stripping the flesh from bone leaving a huddled mass burning […]

we all knew the truth

his story had so many holes in it you could back the moon through the inconsistencies his vagueries implications while never truly saying anything at all trying to convince everyone anything they did he did better a master of oneupmanship willing to do whatever it took to get a moment in the spotlight no matter […]

a fool to the flame

i run my fingers through every flame knowing how it feel but incapable of learning that fundamental hurl me headfirst downdowndown into the volcano let the lava lick my tears feed me to pele an unworthy offering to grant your every single dream come true i am nothing but flotsam floating on your every wave […]

trash

i am nothing but a trash compactor taking words from novel to story to poetry. crushing out meanings until all that sticks to the page is concentrated emptiness. no more expectations or diluted dreampiss hopes just silence and shitty lines of filth. unable to to face myself a corruption of beauty under gray skies a […]

unable to write

every poem is nothing but electricity flashing and a written interpretation of chemicals into aimless chickenscratch spit over maggot lips drooling venomous angst down pitted skin in the false hope it sparks an electrical discharge in the soup of deficiencies in the gelatinous mess driving that entropic meat machine of broken dream reading it my […]

kerouac (un)cool

i take a picture of the last moment of happiness so i can cry as i forget how to smile again there is a resentment in being a caricature of the sad pathetic little poet the ceiling hides the void the words give form to the tangible lack of substance sucking the air from the […]

rind

there is a bitterness in the rind of the lemon but with just a coating of coarse salt that same bitterness is drawn out leaving a perfect vision of summer. my rind is quite bitter this evening senseless renal failure leaves these poisonous thoughts to gain mass to become a new entity hellbent on self-destruction […]

falsehoods over coffee steam

there is a autumnal ache in this false spring of decaying promise and unexpected shivers, dust motes hang heavy on the swollen symphony strummed lightly across tattered old heartstrings. ill intent permeates these overflowing salted rivers of unshed tears from lost lovers last laconic demise, the sparrows sing mutely no soft whistles in this heady […]

less a scribe, more a fool

the air thrums with potential heartbursts of compressed recalcitrance, the moon hangs moribund in sickly shades of amber tinted umbrageousness. and here i lay sadly listening to the sickly thump hiss of corroded arteries, my mind tangled in webbing from lies spun in silvery tongued sanctimonies. less a scribe than an idiot awash in an […]

chocked full of vitamins and miseries

tied up in nots a net of blank refusals raining nuclear dismissals from the hell that is the human condition conditioned to instinctually huntfightandfuck in a soft land of store bought nonessentials prepackaged pineal processes recycling plastics as breakfast food chemically castrating the alpha diabetically with surplus sugars to insulate pancreatic insulin insolence over indulgent […]

god, an astronaut and a spider spinning into forever

spent an hour watching a tiny spider weave a massive web invisible except for errant rays of light streaming from behind the ever present gray blanket a flurry of careful instinctual choreography hypnotizing in the steady chaotic order. lost in the details umable to see the entire work of art incapable of understanding the finer […]

meth frog (for Shawn, the real Meth Frog)

he grew up with just two burning passions; the first being the extravaganza of professional wrestling, and the second a deepseated love for methamphetamines. they called him the leprechaun as a kid because of his perpetual attire in verdant hues until he got old enough to take that first taste of crystal death, then he […]

obstinate

i get smallfalling inon myself whenthe wordsbecome obstinatelike aself-containedmarsupial. i haveforgottenwhich pouchi am ina writhing tumorin my own fleshseeking solacein puckered scars.

april showers

april showers are supposedly the root cause of may flowers but march came in like a lamb and went out like a bipolar yeti the world sleeps and i find myself trapped in this box listening to the lackadaisical tune my entire body tensed to spring as soon as the lid pops open it’s cold […]

holidaze in cambodia

there is a magic in dark depression and dead kennedys too loud alone i don’t know if it is the surf rock grooves or the darkly satire dripping on every off key exclamation third wave ska makes my soul quiver with happiness unable to sit still but jello makes me want to burn the entire […]

deflated

the day went by like a helium balloon slowly succumbing to gravity it held the enjoyment of a rock in your shoe there was no sun shining and i would really like a do over or to absently rub your feet as the rest of the world kindly fucks off

a shitty analogy

the blue cooler sits abandoned a wasted existence left empty no purpose there should be untold memories of sloshing ice and shady grass or white sands the ugly fool sits sorrowfully a wasted existence born empty with no purpose staring out at a blue cooler the same shade as the ice encompassing a stillborn heart […]

p(un)chline

i feel like a goddamned punchline to an unfunny rambling narrative of hells and pointless idiocies unnecessary stresses insufficient funds a mental collapse with the addition of a stolen debit card and falling farther behind. i would scream to the heavens but they are fictional as happily ever after and hope.

even the birds seem static

red hot needles distributed through my guts painglitter grafted inside my skull another day without the sun every whisper feels ominous filled with rusted hooks slowly dissolving packets of poison in turgid flows unpoetic apathies sludge and muck fill rubber tubes aspirations evaporated on the steel grate over this confounded steam powered heart. i don’t […]

rotterdammit all

the city of rotterdam was laid to rubble in less than twenty minutes at the beginning of the second world war it is something i spent way too long researching to be barely used in a novel but i can be obsessed possessed and that’s where i found piet blom rotterdam had always been a […]

swirly

my head is too swirly to be of any good today i feel like a werewolf in springtime mid-transformation stricken down by a never setting full moon

fearfutility

fear is not an emotion i usually face depression is an old lover anxiety a constant companion sorrow paints my day but fear can usually be broken down into the unessentials even as this icy panic feels less whatever the fuck normal means and more batten down the hatches. certain doors opened that i am […]

weak coffee

the wind whistles through the cracked pane diesel fumes and distorted sirens growing ever closer the engines rumble vibrating through the agonies in calicified thought as the flames dance along sunbeams there is a hesitancy in the skies a sense of senselessness streaming from the vacant adoration in the unblinking orb.

deification fixation

he is a purist an anarcho-eucharist blatant plagarist stealing all the best ideas from various religious texts left on read lost in the annals of revisionist historically unfounded incidental inaccuracies it doesn’t matter who said it originally deification through disneyfication hand drawn sketches by former nazis of das ubermensch aimed at childlike misdirectionary retractions a […]

deductive seasoning

there is a tremor shivering along my timid the sound of champagne glasses clinging or the dulcet tones of silver bells sending shimmers through my quicksilver anxieties a horse a cow a herd of slant pupilled goats the smell of fresh hay the snap crack of plastic she beckons me enter wade in the headwaters […]

a hint of crimson

the tinkle of broken glass falling lazily to the floor the sharp gasp as crimson wells a fat droplet slowly sinking into the threads dying the silk a sultry shade of rusted apathy the crunch of glass beneath bare feet leaving a trail from the scene of one crime down the hallway where new sins […]

inherited scars

running down the nascent flesh of infantile dysfunction lies a tangle of inherited scars passed down over generations that never found fulfillment in the trials of a lifetime built out of emotional entanglements. before the first uncertain steps the chemical imbalances given naturally through unnurturing connections that do not transcend the ignobility in puckered skin […]

fresh flesh

disinterring corpses left untouched for far too long revisiting old memories by following the road map etched deep into childhood disavowments i don’t like where i am visiting but i need to find a way to pry these barnacles loose from the fragments of who i very nearly once could have been. not allowing the […]

muted monday

there is an internal struggle against external stimuli wrapped around this compulsion screaming in my skull the world itself is wavering the pressure pushing the center of my skull outwards in the too bright want to be summer sun gleaming down angrily magnified by the fog bank hovering over every thought. i can’t hear the […]

a light

light me on fire use the tattered dream clinging to my broken spirit it ignite a nimbus of blue flames like a malformed phoenix rising to leave a greasy smear in the clear skies of your well deserved tomorrows

spun out/duality

stuckin a mentalspin cyclethe worldoutsidelocked intoa dizzyingarray ofblurry linesindistinctionsin incandescencea tumorousexplosionof malignantintentionsself manufacturedintangibilityindecentlyindivisibleon a cellularlevel of staticinductionsstomachlocked firmlyin the uprightback of the throatpositionchoking on eachwordleft unspokensecond guessingthe third tripon the roundaboutlost in thiscircularillogicreplaying everyirreconcilableinsecurityin an effortto obliterateobligationalirrationalities. the coffeedoesn’t have the samekickthis morningsome daysrequireyour tongueand quiveringthighsas the miseryof a universedraped in monofilamentsof agonyfalls awayas our […]

knotted.

feeling frayed along my quivering edges pulses of cold voltage attacking bare nerves nervous but in that nagging everything is falling apart nebulous insidiousness a constant whisper fraught with sullen peril. feeling frayed afraid tattered scattered left afloat on choppy waves searching for the shore or a single beam to guide back the map shows […]

quietly counting sins

there was a certain subterranean secrecy permeating the cold a glistening hope encased in blue ice hints with no substance just the glimmering radiance of the unknown the bells toll sickly echoing in the tower of rotted wood and brick drifting morosely over the small town sleeping the hiss of neon tubes and flutter of […]

foolosophy 102

someone said it is always darkest before dawn which tells me they have never sat in sunlight and felt even more alone in the waking world than sobbing in bed hoping for a small break in this constant torrent of agonized hells microdamnations pummelling them like a thousand spider bites on every inch of their […]

noth(i)ng but cracks

carve these eyes from my grinning skull cut off my nose to spite my face take a pound or ten of flesh to satiate the sickness burning you up from within. i cannot be your dream but i can give you everything i am until it arrives. i am nothing if not willing because i […]

closing time

it’s overcast and if i am being honest, which is a fatal flaw i have found, i couldn’t give a good goddamn if it ever stops fucking raining. the ground is dry and maybe just maybe we will get lucky and it will wash me away with the rest of the trash blowing around refusing […]

blahblahblah

i have read countless tales of people that faked their deaths to collect life insurance or as simple as just disappearing always anxious looking over their shoulders for johnny law or someone from back home it sounds nearly as exhausting as how i fake being alive. fucking amateurs. try seeking one single solitary reason to […]

poorly ventilated

ravenous butterflies stuck in a hurricane carniverous heartblossoms draped in antiquity the pilot light lies unlit as fumes make the air in the basement hazy the lone light yellowed incandescence with a shoelace hanging limply he murmurs palindromes into the endless night, i long to be draped in fine white linens laid gently in the […]

hell is a gift given by insomnial radiation

i wrap razor wire around my own hazel insecurities carve out notches for each demon residing in this vessel of saturated pain amethyst flashes in the midst of another insipid breakdown blinded by dream a regurgitated hellscape of lonely nightmares. nothing more than shards of broken stained glass refrains never beautiful never whole a slick […]

perpetual notion

he is a perpetual notion machine of rusted gears. unkempt. undreamt. slowly vanishing into his own insignificant need. dizzy from the constant spinning. looping endlessly never going anywhere. just a smudge on the windshield obscuring the scenic emptiness. the sky is blank above me, a canvas on which to sketch with sunshine the many failings […]

needy little bitch

i need drugs something like a /dimmer switch on over firing synaptical distress/. i need hugs something like her arms wrapped tight around (this torn sack of rusted hooks). i need a {break a moment where} purple doesn’t flare in the dark skies in my skull. i have been a \bad friend\ for a little […]

two cats and too much hitler; a daydream

maybe it’s the sun staying out from behind the clouds or possibly it’s the three and a half hours slept having an effect on my usually faulty wiring possibly it is just you bringing beauty into my frame of insular ugliness i don’t know but the words are screaming today as i drive from building […]

loving you from a parking garage in dallas

it is probably ten degrees cooler in the shadows of this concrete behemoth off of main street in downtown dallas cold chills from the trapped winds cut through my hoodie run fingers down my spine as the slabs shimmy with every slow moving car that rolls by staring suspiciously at me surrounded by parts trying […]

seeking loss

sipping lethe in an effort to eradicate these images that dance behind fluttering eyelids seeking short term memory loss in the flood of all the hopeless incidental thoughts that carry the scent of cold winds disturbing the fresh green on the branches shivering in morning sun spring has sprung even as lady winter clings in […]

purgatory is the space between

heaven lies within her gently parted lips on the curve of her spine sprinkled liberally down her thighs behind her knees along thr arch of her foot pooled between her petals and resting between her breasts. hell spills forth from my needy tongue seeking salvation between lines of prose carefully inscribed on all of her […]

7:21, nothing of significance to report

the thunder rumbled at 7:21 there was nothing significant about that but i looked up saw lightning flash and as the thunder rumbled looked at the time sometimes moments are poetry others are just forgotten lost between stimuli like thunder at 7:21 on a rainy march evening unable to think as this frantic need for […]

hyperbolically indifferent

is it hyperbolic if my mind only deals in absolutes? depending on which side of the polar which side of the ache, which role i was assigned by the reader’s unbidden fantasy a caricature half drawn. i deal in absolutes because anything between can and will be used against me. i am a mirage no […]

i am the void.

poetry is a gateway to fucking up your life, it seems my story gets more pathetic with every lie put to meter every word carved out of this infinite sadness that is more real than any succor in the bosom of creation zero validation cathartic only in the way the focus shifts to dissect unravel […]

cryogenic dysmorphia

there is a pall that hovers over sundays a sense of my own existence ending put back into cryogenic sleep again relegated to popsicle status for weeks the silence screams in a way the chatter doesn’t empty apartment empty head of hopelessness

(un)seen

the unseen forces intangibles tangling quasars photonic frenzies cosmic dust formedreformedformless existential horrors in infrared ecstasies ultraviolet highlights at the edge of mental stability crested majesties in crystalized redundancies relegated to rust dried crimson stains marring occam’s razor skipping over the incorporeal stubble on the clockface ever tick tocking an avalanche of grains making sand […]

repetitive chaos

my crazy likes structure repetitive actions for the last five years it has been the same thousand or so songs on my ipod coffee in the morning clockwork poetry writing sessions in empty parking lots routine. the coffee remained canned on this cold friday morn my ipod won’t hold a charge trusted friends became outright […]

a prayer for unbrewed beans

the coffee maker died without a sound no gurgling gasp just a flashing light and no percolation. the morning feels too goddamned impossible to comprehend with no sleep a burgeoning clusterbomb resting in a band around my skull and no coffee to greet the sun. as the things i cannot control scream at me of […]

moon eyed whimsy

haunted by the ghost of yesterday’s moon pregnant over this valley of discontent unwilling unable to let go as azure winds the sliver strives to maintain vigilance over a waking world where dreamslurry ill tidings threaten to drown the weak diffusion between solar flares white hot passion and promises made under lunar waves of sublime […]

mute dawn

the mute dawn spitefully shines down over dissipating apparitions of lost loves hazy recollections sorrowful spirits still seeking to haunt the broken down temple of cardiac disenchantment. nothing more than a desultory approximation hollowed.hallowed a composite primary lesson in decreation of art in the midst of subtle self desecration. deafened under the mute dawn buried […]

alternating

alternating between social distortion and kyuss so i cannot tell if i am broken hearted in need of a fix or driving through the desert with a demon in the passenger seat as hell rains down. either way seems alright as the traffic never slows on the concrete arteries feeding the wasteland around me. maybe […]

3 card migraine

buried beneath an avalanche of ocular obsolescence he didn’t know when it first became an apparent abhorrence but every deck of cards he ever bought came with fifty one jokers yet never a solitary queen of hearts ill suited to gambling as a negative balance prevents the hope of fiscal dexterity just tired of paper […]

happiness vultures

gathering up the remains shattered souldander to fill the forge an iron maiden with white hot spikes to cast a less broken image of ache a stained glass persona splitting the light into a paradoxical prism of colors undreamt in shades of heartthistle as the emotional refuse simmers in molten dissonance my mind lingers on […]

discarded yet not forgotten

she found his heart thumping in the open dumpster took it inside cleaned it up tried to determine if there was any worth in the wheezing organ. it was found to be lacking (re)discarded thrown out in frustration when it didn’t conform to her expectations. in the silence the music it made between straining deflated […]

wet dog and stale smoke

he leans against the building unmindful of the rain scowling at the brown grass as he puffs the cigarette and watches his dog scout for the perfect place to shit we are cordial neighborly i don’t know his name or that of his ankle biting yipping little shit machine but i nod to which he […]

schismspasmsundering

i get overstimulated after a podcast my insides are electrified my brain won’t stop screaming anxiety’s (bi)polar opposite unintended consequences in these semi-suicidal tendencies, running full force into self-destruction it is exhausting saying the things out loud i only have to think typically. besides her i don’t like talking to, well, everyone. i go inside […]

another about birds and highways

the mockingbird has heard me utter her name in sift benediction that i hear it in the causeway cawing it into the howling winds until all i hear is my heart in my head and her glow rattling around my chest cavity of dessicated organic failures crammed tightly into the silver barred birdcage with the […]

(un)

glittering diamonds ebon blanket of velvety darkness i cannot tell if it is infinity screaming profanities at me as i smile like a goddamned idiot unfazed unphased unphrased unpoetic just a steaming pile of word vomit on the side of the road leading absolutely fucking nowhere. so much of my day is spent just lost. […]

too loud too early

the car started with a flatulent whine that did little to make anyone listening feel calm even the birds stopped and glared with cocked heads at the terrible commotion as the sun hid behind clouds. i just watch it through the open blinds sipping my last cup of coffee as i put on my doc’s […]

choking

choking onfreedomsin place ofhaving foodas they taxthe air andthe waterfilling upcoffers ofill gottenricheshastily extractedfrom groundup dreamsthe ashes ofthe middle classtwist in thebreeze as thewhips crackon the bare fleshof the poor.

tragedy in gray

everything is diffused in gray lending a sort of apocalyptical in the best of purgatorial air to a solemn mourning. the crows have all lined along the roofs of the neighboring buildings to stare baleful disinterest from too intelligent beady black orbs. i whisper my love and zip the hoodie as a chill runs its […]

i close my eyes and count to infinity

i close my eyes only to find i am the only thing that vanishes as if i was never truly here unnoticed by the world at large. tearing pieces off my tissue paper soul to flutter in the breeze of apathetic insufficiency a shadow where once a man stood shivering in inconsequentialities. i close my […]

herd immunity

i am fascinated by kashmiri saffron the delicate purple flowers the strands of red the dry lands at the feet of the himalayas the struggles with global warming. whole cultures have been radically altered as the world changes around them for all of our technological leaps we seem to fall farther behind at being human […]

fried

fried.sizzling brainsvacantchoppy wavesslappingmy empty skull.fried. i wrotea novelthat took meto a verydark place. she shinedher lighton me to keep me safe. but itlingersunder myskinetched onmy bones. i cannotfullyshake it. i have been coldfor weeksdeep downmarrow frozenshiveringin theafternoon sun. i amfriedand theentireworldexcept for heris soveryveryugly. just like me.

suspension

the power of my glare keeps the ceiling suspended just like my disbelief floating in the air all the hidden scenes interspaces within the textured cage a zygote ensconced in eggshell whimsies am i a realization sorrow in actualization just a mass of tumors twisted around fractured spinally etched columns filled with poisons a cadaverous […]

leonine glare

i take my painamplify ituntil it burnswhite hotuntil it burnsits way intothe aether luckilythere has neverbeena shortageto mine i let itnearlykill mekept itcagedbehind deadbrown eyes humpty dumptythe foolfilled withangry hornetsfinally fellone time too manyand all of hisinsignificancespilled overthe dirty alleyadjacent tosuicidal daydreams now all iknow to dois let the agonyleakstaining the worldin lavender lightninga pebblein […]

cashewed poetry

scientifically straddling subservient and transient (feeble emotive words scr amble to propagate) cracked cobblestones line the bleak murky corridors (calculating eternity usi ng broken hearts as a med ian) beaten down by every soulsputter review glancing deep into infinity eyes laid bare to the triumphant tragedies of interstellar recognizance the cashew is a necessary by-product […]

there is nothing at all

staring down the barrel of self defeat hating every word that falls from these maggot lips to form frost across the dead embers that settled on the more meaningless parts that make up this petrified tree gnarled branches giving only rotted offerings to the neon wasteland of accrued uglinesses in double helixed atrophy. i turn […]

still the sun rises to cast spite upon the day

deep black thrombosis nestled next to fleeting palpations a restriction in the affable trickle constricting the gold from the morning light a parable, a prayer empty words thrown carelessly into the aether in hopes of striking a spark along the indifference of eternal nothingness. the coffee drips as i watch the sun banish the darkness […]

heavy

sometimes when i read or see something hopeful i begin to sob not because of the beauty but because it is all so goddamned hopeless when it takes fiction to express it and that feels awfully heavy. it is fucking heavy right now. everything. just so fucking heavy. this too shall pass. i just really […]

memory lame

what we had the thing that died with barely a twitch just casually slung barbs a poisoned monstrosity mistaken for genuine emotion misplaced mistimed and missing key elements. it was a shambling corpse with a red ribbon tied around its broken neck lingering far longer in agony than in any real sort of emotional stability. […]

cut

i cut myselfdailythe nibof the quillinto my exposedaortato spillmyself outonto the dirtyfloorpooling upin the fibersof the carpetinto anotherimpossibleword jumblemeant to tellher thati love her. more scar tissuethan manmore poetrythan poeticjust a lonelyfool withtoo much timetoo many wordsand not enoughher pressed closewhen the sorrowforces me tocut myself daily.

impersonal dot com

i woke to a flashing blue light a work email telling me happy anniversary two years with the company in a message from a generic address – human resources at incentive dot com. it is the personal touch that makes me feel valued. i replied with thanks for the email will there be a raise […]

supernova

my body a glass jar rattling with pure electric ecstasy every cell screaming in atomic reduction as my every synapse shoots molten death on any hope for quiet. somedays i am just soundwaves vibrating in a frequency undetectable by human ears. unvisible in vibrant shades of falling apart. i am no longer stardust. i am […]

seeking meaning

kitten with claws unsheathed stalking shadows in the afternoon sun squirrel on the grass staring at each and every noise with silent trepidation the planes fly high above us with loud rumbling sonic waves as the busy people circle impatiently waiting for one open runway to settle among the kittens and the squirrels under the […]