(un)titled halloween

the mist gathers at the feet of the tombstones a swirling fog obscuring the brown grass the weatherfaded plastic flowers left in half-hearted memoriam the moon casts a baleful glare down upon the cemetery cold uncaring as the scene of loss becomes a cloud of distant malaise a single howl shakes the too silent land […]

(un)titled home

the taste of her on my lips the feel of her against my side as she mumbles sleepily how long has the bed been empty devoid of dream lost with no anchor to keep me in place against the turbulent tides her gentle breathing in a room so silent for far too long waiting for […]

(i)ntense

this sudden flash of intense intentionality sends quivers down an already jelly like spine introvert introvert hiding in the dark introvert introvert tinder waits for spark the need to ravish lavish speak a language of erotic nonsense hiding biding waiting for time to end another surge intentional intensity sending spasms down an already vapid dream

gra(e)y

it is all gray grey dimmed demure distressed the entire world blanketed by clouds in a state of never ending storms unpossible to tell if it is the artificial lighting or the sun desperate to show it’s face it is all gray grey shuttered solemn stupefied it isn’t the end of the world just the […]

thunder

i speak in spiral staircases in the quiet spots of my mind rounding each level to end up exactly where i began i can no longer tell if the thunder is in my head or shaking the windows as it rolls constantly in and without when i shut my eyes every sound sends flashes of […]

teardreams

the emptiness seems particularly alluring as the gravity of low wave emissions from the satellite heart careen off of yet another comet bearing down on the tragedy of lethargy solar radiation tickles the marrow of bonethrust beneficiaries impossible to get bearings when the lodestone prefix is randomized in the flames of fallow indignation can you […]

fly

she shivers like a fly in a web sending teases of desire rippling across the threads of silk attracting the spider in search of an easy meal

of regret

the bassinet rocks softly dangling from the edge of a cliff at the edge of nowhere where nothing is what it seems nowhere is as close as the emptiness in the center of a heart the wind howls loudly causing small cries to join the choral wonder of banality sundered from the wet lips of […]

ode to night in the city

she was a stick of dynamite i was just an errant spark in the long cold night of another wasted weekend left weakened strung out against the dirty brick of any alley in any city around the world. we made love as the sirens wailed i ran my hungry fingers across every track mark with […]

depth deception vol II

while we struggle for a piece of the pie they churn out new ones at a faster rate than we could ever hope to consume the bible belt is straining to maintain decorum in a land of corn syrup daydreams called diabetic comas we don’t rage against the machine we happily slot ourselves into position […]

depth deception

the graffiti bleeds through no matter how many coats of paint they apply no matter how they spin the story it all boils down to none of what you perceive being real just another fantasy spewed on the fetid breath of freedom with hands bound by inconsequential order it is just another mirage a variance […]

findings vol. I

i find it is easier to love a corpse than another person for the simple fact that you never have to watch the love fade in their lifeless orbs i find it makes more sense to love a memory because in the end it is colored by the idealistic brush of time immemorial with no […]

seeds

falling is love is planting a grove of trees as seeds knowing you will never sit in the shade it casts but instead in the hope of someone else getting to enjoy a brief reprieve from the rays of the sun that mercilessly pound down from the sky

sublimation

i only drink orange juice after brushing my teeth i prefer to shower fully clothed i rarely cringe when a stranger makes eye contact i rarely leave my home i am the sum of all my faults i am the lack of depth perception on a trail lined with rusted barb wire i feel there […]

seven percent battery

the world has been boiled down into handheld screens where the events happening just over the silicon go ignored there is no longer a need to experience when you can let others describe it for you instead the sunset looks beautiful in stunning high definition even if it loses definition in the darkened room alone […]

raven eyes

those moments before the sun rises when the world is stirring but has yet to open it’s eyes the chill breeze blows with a hint of rain the random car sputters sleepily towards the beyond it is a moment of peaceful reflection tinged with rejection a time for deflection before the sunrays pierce the void […]

seasonal

he whispers to himself it is just seasonal but the goddamned season has lasted his entire life he mutters to himself it is the story cracking down on his already weary framed of mein this isn’t all it’s built up into yet somehow it is still more than can be accepted by a fractured soul […]

down

i remember when the breakdown was part of a song not a snot covered mess huddled in the corner begging for an end to something intangible it was drums and bass with a tease of guitar not sobbing as the world crashes down

outside the door

feeling that feeling that sleepy sliding feeling that need to hide to disappear to become a myth of a rumor anxious energetically tiredly manic lost in the ever spinning arm of spiralling hopelessness as the world pisses cold rain on the dirty concrete right outside the door

texas rain

it’s raining in texas this time of year is always tough but when it is raining in texas on a cool autumn night it seems worse somehow so now it’s raining in texas as he sits with face pressed against the cold pane of glass somehow it is worse somehow it’s worse homesick for a […]

glued

he superglued his fingers together while trying to superglue his heart the poor fool listens to the rain as sleep sits just out of reach

pointless

there is an ache a dull throbbing dancing along the left side radiating with every second no amount of tears alleviate this deep down sense of despair trying to capture smiles with a butterfly net to watch them sigh mockingly as they dissipate into heartache

morning com(mute)

the zen of moving in silent half step across the asphalt indignation of sullen traffic tumors the organism is in the death throes of poor organization sputtering in the final throes of orgasmic release tally ho to valhalla tally ho on purgatory musings of unassuming muses transcends the cornucopia of madness lurking just behind the […]

trapped

decompartmentalize vaccuseal the emotional discourse reintroduce the bastardized intent with lack of substance boiled down to the bare bleached bone in a cauldron of misconstrued potions love spells for turning frogs to toads turtles to tortoises languid lie to earnest truth trapped in an endless loop of listlessness

on writing II

sometimes it feels like speeding downhill with the brakes engaged sometimes like pulling your own teeth with no anesthesia at others it is a waterfall naturally going along a predetermined path by currents just below the surface but it cannot be forced poked or prodded without falling apart in the hands feebly grasping for it

is(n’t)

the thing about depression that normal people don’t get is it isn’t sadness it is but it is not as well it comes to give kisses when you are happy draping you in too hot hugs bringing the world into it’s control it is a lack of motivation an inability to act on basic human […]

a case of the b’s

the blue black of a winsome bruise bringing back memories of beatings bygone lashing from the righteous fists of blind indignation thrown by the hulking brutes of benevolence in benign bitterness a benediction beguiling the besmirched beggars banished to the bell towers of briney loss bastardly betrayed by brandished blades

errant

we were two errant stones tossed into the turmoil of every day but when you crashed into me suddenly i had to ponder the randomness of it all

cyclical

time has no siblings death has no friends life is but a daydream sorrow never ends she kicked a can down the street as the lights flickered on an hour early due to the change in season a dog snarled through a gap in the weatherworn wooden fence with a tenacious need to be heard […]

a bit of tease, (un)poetic

coming soon from Potter’s Grove Press, my first poetry collection. I’ve said it before and I’ll repeat it, I love writing fiction but I need to write poetry. This labor of love is a culmination of two months of spiralling emotion spilled across the page. The cover, by the brilliant Don Noble, that you get […]

ringless

the rings of saturn are melting ring rain falling on the lonely giant uv bombardment from solar flares causing the ice to melt liquid pulled into the magnetic force of number six in the planetary chain some things seem to be forever yet the trappings of eternity are as foreign a concept as emotional discourse […]

zoos

service call at the zoo broken machine and a rambling eye as i stroll around watching the lions watching me with vague disinterest i can’t help but wonder as i sit in my rolling terrarium down the road who is watching me

tired

rip van winkle had the right idea feels as if i could sleep a couple decades yet somehow still wake up needing another hour or two go to bed early wake ten times in the night a series of cat naps over months leaves exhaustion as the the only end

stained innocence

the sublime suicide in slow emotion every crack in the fabric of less than earnest smiles defies the atonal arrangement of subtle surprise a tear in the hivemind of superfluous intersection an intervention in intention the invention of release a reprieve in the remorse laden survivor guilt of stained innocence

natural order in chaotic bloom

the trees grow in perfect lines the birds fly in impossible formation the fibonacci sequence seems vivid in the least likely spaces between thoughts as the world consumes my vision the stump struck by lightning bears warning for the forest the green of the leaves become fiery flashes red gold to brown on the shadowed […]

i won’t

the last thing the world needs is another sappy piece of pedantic prose proclaiming the platitudes of love how many lines can be written about the way my heart skips a beat when you smile that secret smile of ours another stanza dedicated to the inherent joy of simply knowing you exist as a boon […]

ritual

sheered like a lamb for slaughter bathed in rose water like a virgin for sacrifice the sconce drips liquid flame onto the dusty stone of the pathway incandescent sapphires in sapphic delight into the bowels of the dungeon dragged deeper to be spit like meatgolems on the spear of destiny a lone dog howls from […]

intent

i never meant to ever make you cry but i would be lying if i didn’t say my intent was to elicit some sort of primal response to crack the stone facade peer behind the illusion see what you could be by being you

famished

the world eats the dead the young the old it doesn’t care just feasts famished belly pains insatiable while slowly spinning in predefined paths through a void that defines with out as well as with in is it any wonder the jackal stalks though the tall grass the snake slithers across the sands the dead […]

autumnal decay

time dilates as the worldblood coagulates a thickening of sap as tree limbs explode in sequence with the bitter scent of autmunal decay the grim grin of death sweeps across the hills of childhood leaving a corpse in a copse of rotted leaves on the trails to memory lost

head first

speeding down the road with no headlights cracked windshield no seat belts stereo on full blast bare tires wet asphalt hairpin curves your smile filling my mind head first into you nothing else for me to do but fall headlong into you yellow lines blur into one solid state of inebriated dysfunction lost in your […]

(un)titled longing

(did you know how closely behind i followed your scent in my nostrils my heartbeat in my skull the random nature of chaotic order pulsing like fireflies in the night) unfurl the bloody rags of yesterday in which to sully the mist of disinterest (it was dark in the city you turned with no blinker […]

thorn

beware the thorn pierces the sole of the barefoot wanderer injecting itself into the very fiber of laconic belief foolish oaf brandishing the banter of wayward souls drifting along the banks of the stream in search of shelter the milky dew of infection drips down from cancerous sores yet still blistered feet carry the nomads […]

cast aside

cast aside eyes of subtle devotion evocative orbs of slain lovers spread across the fields of glory like baubles from the vending machine of half lived declarations spent like brass shells strewn on the heartshit dagger of monstrous regret softly whispered virginal oaths rent from half formed vocal chords to bandy just under audible lucidity

art show

she sits patiently the tip of her pink tongue showing between red lips with a hint of pearly white a smudge adorns her cheek charcoal on her finger tips as she carefully sketches out an idea in the face on the sheet the whorls of her fingerprints sculpt the details inherent in the imagined she […]

allusionary

she pointed happily in a state of permanent delusion at a sign inked in lenticular design refined by the subtle shading of ignorance defined by the absence of color broadcast in high definition directly into the hippocampus of the benign i just shrugged and went back to sleep sometimes delusion is contagious deep down knowing […]

bemusement park

there is no more bereft feeling no more hopeless sorrow no more barren land than that moment before bed when you look over at the emptiness that consumes you blow it a kiss then stare at the ceiling for hours on end a hand drawn out of order sign on the tilt a whirl of […]

spilled milk

i have never cried over spilled milk that said i have spilled milk that was the last straw on an already fragile holding it together then broken down until tears spilled into the milk on the floor

greenwood cemetery

hidden in the middle of the outer edge of downtown near the heart of uptown lies a cemetery in the shadows of an ever growing city non-denominational with worn angels watching over illegible cracked stones it seems fitting as i sit peering through the spiked metal fence the sky decides to open up in a […]

mirror maze

she got out of the car at the red light with a dramatic sigh swearing she would never come back two hours later she knocked at the door shivering from the rain with remorse running like mascara down her cheeks he was already in bed long passed out from another needless fight tired of the […]

eight things

that look you give when you smile but it is just for me in a room full of people two moonbeams twirled together in the shape of your breasts as you sleep a piece of colored glass that caught the sun on the first morning we spent together a pebble worn smooth by the oceans […]

and behold her majesty, for she is death

her smile left a chalk outline on the ground suicide in her gaze left every wrist itching for a taste pupils contract in the grandeur of another willing demise she was born a homicide whether it was yours or her own a life would be taken before it was over given to sate her all […]

dentata d’amor

our love was a mouth full of baby teeth as we grew it loosened slowly fell out as adulthood forced it’s way to the surface it took growing to find the truth behind the enamel of what love should truly be trying to straighten it out with metal bands that only constrict the natural flow […]

cityscape

sitting in a parking lot outside another plain building in a slew of buildings lining the same street in any town in any city in the country i wonder if this is what people in the past imagined the world would become a homgenized mess of glass and concrete with no soul

pawned off

the problem with soaring is the inevitable landing effortlessly flying high over the world with only the clouds as company it is worse when the landing is face first into a tree hidden in mists right as day is supposed to break i have no say in anything at any point told where to go […]

icy hands

do you feel the hands clawing up and down your pretty little soul the cold fingers scraping against the weak frail broken heart of indiscretion past the lone cry of the gulls circling the landlocked department store parking lot lost their way far from tha seas they were born to fly over been gripped so […]

echo of before

once trust is broken or a secret being told it ceases to exist in the form it once held like capturing the breeze in a jar there is no chance of retaining intent when i was a child i tried to keep a snowball to see winter in summer but all that remained was a […]

biting winds of memory

rasps files graters across soft skin layer by layer exposing nervous condition bleak sorrow as saline solutions bring aching pain do you recall the sunrise when the breeze held the scent of hope the birds sang the flowers bloomed the world was in our hands do you recall the feel of fingers entwined stolen kisses […]

discarded

sliding down the drain like the last remains of summer’s sweet kiss to pool in the pipes of tomorrow’s decay leaves in the gutter rotting with the rest of the discarded daydreams of childhood taken in vain

stark

it was a beautiful abomination monstrous in depthless misery reminiscent of arterial spray cast along stark winter wonder a blizzard of gore a heart ripped from it’s bone prison lain upon a bed of lotus still beating the spectacle of ugliness made into gorgeous symmetry like the moon on a blade as it plunges still […]

New news from me to youse

Exciting news on the horizon regarding new stuff from the fool, also known as M. Ennenbach. The incredible Tara Caribou has curated two volumes of the best writers going. The first of which is coming out October 25th for physical release (and who doesn’t love holding a good book) and October 30th for the e-book […]

collander

some days writing is like catching rain in a collander some days the bucket is overflowing others they just trickle to the dirt i have been drowning as of late but know the arid days too well

tea time with kafka

kafka and i shared tea while hiding behind the thick dusty curtains as burroughs banged on the front door he had a haunted look in his sunken eyes as ginsberg ran naked from behind a bush with a shrill cry i saw a cockroach the size of a large dog scurry into the kitchen with […]

some rivers never meet the sea

not all rivers make it to the sea though some are born of lakes far inland from the ever shifting oceans step into the shadows slide out of your clothes let me run my fingertips softly along your tributaries in search of your hidden inlet sip lightly from your abundant waters while your thighs against […]

fugue

between the wind chimes and the neighbor’s songbird i feel like i am in a tornado of disharmonic nausea an orchestra pit this side of hell with demons clamboring a serenade to the chorus of the damned wailing all being played in a coffin on the back of a horse drawn carriage down a cobblestone […]

sighs

she sighed as she stared at the clouds forever is temporary the dream is just that we won’t live eternally she looked at me and smiled a sad thing but we have right now so there is always that i suppose

spacial

spending so much time in the cold reaches of space lately that the world around me feels foreign the sterility of the words has numbed the discharging life that circles ever so frantic sound travels oddly in the lack of gravity no atmosphere lungs shriveled like prunes i gasp loudly in a panic as if […]

tsunami

feeling like another abandoned dream on the side of the rural road between wholesome and winsome watching life turn to ash blowing through the trees on another bench in the center of nowhere it was me it was me it was me then it wasn’t in a flash it just wasn’t left to rot like […]

too tired to hope

damn the laws of nature that keep the waterfall from flowing back up the craggy spires of time damn the laws of physics that make it impossible to understand the bumblebee’s majestic flight damn the stars damn the sky damn the infinite cosmos with it’s immensity in the face of reality ever expanding with the […]

she loved

she loved like a haunted house incapable of letting go the past she loved like a tombstone faded by the wind and rain but she loved oh, how she loved she loved like a carnival thrilling with every new sight she loved like the spring sun nurturing with abundant light she loved sweet mother mercy, […]

10/7

today marks the day poe died the ravens circle the sky autumn falls as the world begins to slumber to dream a restless sleep filled with haunting cries the chill wind carries the smell of burning pitch brick by brick the amontillado beckons that cursed eye unblinking as usher falls leaving mortar to coat the […]

in summary

sum up two months in one paragraph to convince the world your words are worth reading sisyphus smiles at the fool with sweat on his brow depression regression obsession a subtle denial of the sorrowful mindslate wiped clean with unacceptance the rattling jaw of a skull picked clean by unempathy’s murder of crows

high to low

two months of a constant drip of cbd kept the ship even keeled on the seas now the razor edge of mania is speaking in dulcet tones never feel as alive as when the madness gets you high but the precipitous fall is always one step away it has been so long since the last […]

a legacy

kerouac was anti-semetic lovecraft was racist bukowski was just another liar poe was an addict and shakespeare was a thief all i hope is the world looks at me with the same disregard for fact one day a crumpled pack of cigarettes next to a coffee stain on the table by a worn copy of […]

mercurial nothing

she sighed like a smiling buddha one step removed from screaming fuck nirvana in the sad mist of sputtered inconsequence i hear horns car brass train all mixed into a cacophony of sullen morose the type you only get when the last good day is three days past expiration we break open thermometers to swim […]

too tired to sleep

exhaustion like a robe made of angry ants wrapped around the pink skin of too much scrubbing to remove the stain of soul deep sin so tired that sleep excuses itself to the other room to drink whiskey while soft jazz plays plucking notes of longing from the emptiness to build a nest in the […]

courageous/contagious

i am not courageous no i am contagious just with symptoms that don’t affect the normal effects of living in a monochrome daydream of the american scream the worn carpet beneath my bare feet with black painted nails feels like the threadbare soul of hope stretched down along commerce street around where kennedy got shot […]

why not

the typical question i get when someone finds out i write is why. what else is there? i respond with a quizzical look painted on my normally scowling face. some people see the face of god in the world around them some see inherent beauty some people see wonder. i don’t see any of that. […]

the rat king dances for scraps

his big toe sticks out the hole in the filthy sock hanging over the edge of the worn out matress on the floor of the last motel this side of newark empty cans litter the floor with moldy take out containers scrounged from the dumpster behind the korean restaurant next to the flashing neon cross […]

cricket chorus

they race down the street with coffee can mufflers drowning out the music the equalizer lights bounce in time with the rpms all the while the cricket chorus goes ignored in the bushes outside the window

as the night settles in

the demons rest in heaven as the angels bask in hell the sink drips all night long the sound of drooling idiots fighting for the remote fold a pillow over your head maybe then the voices will cease the infernal racket it is too late for apologies far too early for sleep there is a […]

commiserates

he stares blindly listening to the silence of the world on fire it is another thursday his phone tells him another day in agony the only difference between weekday or weekend is where he commiserates

saint vitus

they dance up and down the street in twitching shudders bare skulls in the pale light of just before dawn saint vitus smiling through gap toothed longing unkempt the witches cackle as they tug the strings of winsome marionettes

glass eye

sometimes i see life as reflected in a glass eye stuck in a wrinkled face that once held youth like a hostage a prisoner wasted in the hope it softly fell in love but that glass eye rolls across the floor under the couch to never see another sunrise

mariposa

ella era una mariposa montando en la capa negra de la muerte sangre goteando como una lluvia de verano de sus colmillos ella era el eclipse proyectando sombras invertidas con cada aleta de sus alas en el aire quieto she was a butterfly riding in the black cape of death dripping blood like a summer […]

siren’s tale

she sat on the trash like the mermaid of the dump watching the wind blow garbage across the dusty land oh siren oh siren of the municipal waste did you imagine this was how your life would eventually turn out once the prettiest girl in her class now the trackmarks run down her arms like […]

currents

it is october i find myself dreaming of the ocean but the lapping waves are her kisses all i want is to drown instead it is too hot in texas while she lounges at the beach letting the waves kiss her toes as the sun shines down i put rocks in my pockets and wade […]

jack

with shaky hands he grabs the knife cutting through scooping out the slimy innards to be tossed in the trash with yesterday’s hope with blurred vision he stabs leaving jagged triangles for eyes an open wound to breath through before slowly sawing a perpetual grin he is covered in sweat gore the rancid scent of […]