there was another me once upon a time far from where i am what i have become the thing i am would you believe i once loved freely gave of myself smiled openly shared deeply it wasn’t one single catastrophic event it was a series of micro fractures cascading through my mind i fell apart […]
i am lost all of it crumbles melancholy meanderings losing whatever was left out of hope staring in the mirror tsol ma i
tired of being cold alone trapped in this cycle of desire and painfully throbbing desire incapable of finding the secret combination of letters to unlock the puzzle conundrum riddle here is what i have found so far eppvhoialssne the hint says two words without meaning to the poet illiterate
i read it isn’t about weathering the storm it is learning to dance in the rain so i strapped on my best rusty suit of armor let the lightning strike as it is wont to do stripped down to my boxers frolicked in the blizzard chased tornados with nothing but the best intentions i stared […]
have you ever stared into your reflection and only seen madness the face that faces out at you a concoction misshapen snarling caricature and you try put in the effort to smile but the simple act has lost all meaning the muscles twitch spasm writhe like a mass of electric eels or tentacles just beneath […]
last night i wrote the greatest poem i had ever written my phone was dead so i grabbed a notebook and pen and frantically wrote the words the words seemed whispered from the mouth of an angel directly into my ear i wept as i wrote them i saw splashes of tears on the page […]
sipping wine from the bottom of the barrel red lips and unfocused eyes antifreeze and failing kidneys wobbly like a cowboy fresh from the dusty trail got an itchy trigger finger a pocket full of dollars and a need to wash the dirt from every crevice cracking my facade haven’t been on a horse for […]
how long has it been since i’ve seen the sun is it weeks now the sky opened and let loose the rains and i cannot tell any longer if it is a reflection of me or if i am a reflection of it when was the last time any of this felt worth it that […]
the room was on fire the flames consumed all racing up the curtains embers blew in the smokey haze on now visible currents yet in the center of the room immune to the heat and falling rafters we danced cheek to cheek to the crackling timbers as the blaze took the piano in the corner, […]
i cannot see, this fallacy, this faded sea, this infancy sadness, madness, sorrowful morose, singular, modular, scented malaise shake the plastic eight ball and show me my future, all of my answers hidden in the murky blue depths all signs point to the emptiness the uncertain certainty of cerulean cynicism sinking softly into saline daydreams […]
lethologica and fregoli delusion settle in every face is the same no names endless crowds of strangers in a room full of friends i’ve said certain words so many times semantic satiation has set in the neural pathways have been burned from my mind so if i look you in the eyes and have no […]
my life has become an abandoned camp ground, when i explore it seems i’m always traveling past tents, in the past tense, by fires that raged but left blackened circles of stone and half whittled confessions if you close your eyes you can hear camp songs echo over the trees, which is funny because i’ve […]
am a light bulb swinging in a dark basement, the filament is tenuous and the next flip of the switch, surge of voltage could be the last, glowing a burnt sienna when once it was white hot illumination a festering wound filled with maggots that no matter how ravenous can not eat the spoil away […]
sitting on the floor of the airport, curled up in a ball, trying not to let the tears fall down my cheeks knew when i woke up today would be a shitstorm didn’t expect it to fall the way it did, as quickly as it did, as fully as it did and i am destroyed […]
i fear i’ve opened a vein a vain, a vane, a vein vanity, venial, verity, verify sitting in a rickety car at the top of a steep incline wooden slats, metal seats, a rusty safety harness the operator smiles up at me his one tooth gleaming in the moonlight as he prepares to pull the […]
i dreamt and in that dream i dreamt we were on the beach in front of crystal blue water and on that beach in front of crystal blue water we fed each other dates and pointed at the fins moving about in the distance stomachs full of dates and pointing at the fins moving about […]
i sat on the bench outside the hotel my internment camp away from home and watched them he opened the door of the car for her and carried in all of their bags still finding a way to have his love painted across his face she beamed at him watched his every movement the glint […]
who am i i don’t know any more me i know the mess stress distress the urge to regress repress digress deflect the question to the uncaring void of forever the only mark a person existed is a couple pairs of scuffed up vans a vaguely human char shape on the couch spontaneously combust all […]
is it disillusion or confusion, how did it come to this, facing hard truths and the lies seem just as bad life is a cancer, we’re all just polyps, lesions, a legion of pus filled protrusions pinching a nerve and the cure is no better than the symptom i said the cure is no better […]
farewell to the darkness resting in my mind to the writhing agony that pervades every movement to the things i dreamt of in the quiet moments the echos of more subsonic insubstantial simperings subtly vanishing into the shadows a flash of light a cloud of smoke drift into the reflection of future incomprehension the lone […]
the head cold connected to the sinus the sinus connected to the inner ear the inner ear controls equillibrium and the idiot want to be poet falls and hits his head insult to augury congregation, we are gathered to witness the last dying dregs of his immortal pride as he wakes, wrapped in his blanket […]
they say when you see 11:11 you are exactly where you are supposed to be it is a sign you are going the right way everyday i catch it at least once and where i am is not where i need to be listen to me, i am not supposed to be here, this is […]
when they said the phone was for me i felt the cold hand of dread tickle down my spine no one ever called for me at work and if they did they certainly never asked by real name the last time it happened it was the police they wanted to ask questions about a destroyed […]
the onyx velvet dappled with diamonds above me, the orange of the dashboard lights, the calming sound of hardcore punk followed by japanese synth jazz, cyber punk and serene, methodically mythological missives floating in the air around my head the smell of grease and salt, golden arches a blur as i speed by, the overloud […]
it’s too early to be this damn tired my mind is fixated on the time change i’ll endure soon losing an hour of life i’ll get it back eventually but will i really once gone it seems too fleeting to ever lasso again like the smile and wave at the end of the bar and […]
woke up into a dream, a seamless transition, running through the park, dark footsteps shadowing my own, heart racing, sat up in bed glad the dream was over, got up to get a glass of water, only my bed was floating over forever clutching my lion blanket, my constant companion since my childhood home burnt […]
i’m in the mood to burn it all down set it on fire and run away a villa in mexico maybe sipping sangria with senoritas farm agave and make my own tequila blanco diablo distillery guarantee dysentery to the first ten thousand customers not feeling the happy side of the street lately someone ground up […]
buried in an avalanche of erectile dysfunction pills and princes who seek asylum the great deals only i have been selected to receive and the tax debt relief i didn’t know i needed under the auto warranties and mail order brides the dating sites and hot horny women in my area between car insurance rates […]
laying in a pile of pine needles, more a bed of nails, like a thousand wriggling cockroach legs against an uneager spine, working through fibers and finding pale flesh pockmarked by old love and sickness the ground is damp from fallen rains and cold with the promise of winter, all deciduous nudity and frank truth […]
he wandered the aisles of the store no longer sure what he came to buy and without any money to purchase anything anyway he thought about stuffing it into clothes that whatever it was he came to get he was sure he’d remember positive in fact he came with a craving grabbed a rotisserie chicken […]
the sun hasn’t set but i’m laying in bed trying to get you out of my head been reading your words and wishing they were for me and my head is pounding again been a rough couple weeks filled with sin seem to be a couple more ahead of me mocking and i cannot seem […]
i see her in everyone her eyes her smile strangers in a crowd they make eye contact and smile her smile a smile that was made just for me or at least i thought it was but i saw her sitting with him a him that wasn’t me or was it am i the me […]
she looked at me for a long moment, weighing the words before asking do you still hate me i don’t know what i expected her to say but it wasn’t that a swarm of knives flew around my mind unbidden, so many hurts and wounds and scars still forming no, not any more and never […]
she looked at me with tears running down her beautiful face she shook like a leaf in a hurricane as the agony poured from her torrential and seemingly endless i sat with my arm around her shoulders powerless in the face of this storm she had not spoken a word since i arrived after receiving […]
i’m leaving she said, bright eyes suckered by the greener grass of new sides pulled in by white lies and brighter dyes, the facade of what she hoped would be true i let her go, knowing that once she traipsed barefoot through the fresh manure coating everything she would come running back while what i […]
i’ve been trying to figure out how to best introduce myself to you i thought maybe i would slide in, dressed up in a vest and bowtie, shirt tucked in, pocket watch chain hanging casually, my docs all shined up a smooth first impression say my name and assume you would recognize it, maybe go […]
