there was a fire in my soul long gone from ember to settle into cold ash. you came stirred the remains with your curiosity reignited the flames inside. now it burns vibrant with an inferno that licks the sky feverishly. i was reborn awoken to be more than i ever dreamt before. a phoenix risen […]
so tired i can’t sleep so full of words that fall like a waterfall of toxic sludge from the open river of my subconscious to discolor the land into a disease infected night terror from vincent’s shack the septic scarring of self doubt that leads to carving pieces of myself in an effort to appear […]
i cannot stop imagining you here standing there with a smile blinking away years as i try to take all of your wonder in there is an ache a longing a need that only you can sate so i sit let the world fade away while imagining you standing here my eyes glued to yours […]
i dwell on the faults the fault lines the growing crevices between hope and fear the tectonic shift of radically altered vistas as the pangaean world becomes no more than separate continental divisions divisive detached like the retinal scan of futuristic metal hulls holes in the time space continuation that brings silence to the silent […]
i sketched a self portrait this morning with a pricked finger and vermillion lines across off white expenditures too varied to be recalled as the red faded to rust faded to black to flake from the chemically treated pulp of a once mighty oak and the thousands of tiny gashes across my hand scabbed over […]
the sunshine is bright today my love, piercing the gloom of another day in purgatory awaiting your supple lips it was chilled when i awoke but steadily the air grows warmer, it is strange the subtle shifts, soon it will be too hot so early cock your ear, the sounds of mockingbirds singing fills the […]
memento mori remember you have to die so live every moment like it is your last love as fiercely as you can never let up this is the honeymoon period the only one we get so memento mori my love until the very end i am yours
it was in her hands i placed my heart a seed for her to nurture no where else did it feel as safe as there it was a sudden relief a gift a shower of light when she first stepped into view like a dream never before did letting go feel quite as right as […]
my pantry is filled with the ghosts of meals consumed shadows of cravings empty of nutritional value as the serpentine worm burrows deeper and deeper into the hazy gray sky above, cloud becomes soil in which to bury oneself in the foggy chemtrails of last season’s harvest my soul is cobwebbed a half painted ode […]
they sit in the sunlight listening to the birds making a close approximation of work when ever the boss comes rolling in on his golf cart like a fat napoleon checking the battle lines before going back to drink wine and dine with prostitutes in his gaudy tent or palace or whatever it is bedazzled […]
i watch the rain fall on the funeral procession unable to make out the faces in the crowd of mourners huddled together in all black under gray skies sobbing only the tractor seems to celebrate life with yellow iron and gouts of smoke from the idling engine the priest waves his hands but his words […]
her lips beckon in the corner of dream, to sneak kisses by slipping down an uncrowded side street in a crowded city the way they curl into a smile that makes the sun dim slightly when the full radiance is shone on the world itself the rains had come for the third day straight, yet […]
my first brush with death was watching my grandmother waste away in her bed, she had lost both legs years prior but was still a stern and beautiful woman in the end she was a husk that barely recognized we were there as she lay panting in her too large bed, the light slowly fading […]
60 the transient subversion of mitochondrial incontinence leads to false manhandling of litigious legumes 59 the brass clock clicks as the nervous ticks begin to rapid fire, his face grows wan this trembling man as he begins to perspire 58 breathe, just breathe, let the salt laden air infuse you with cleanliness 57 the sky […]
i woke from a dream reached over for you but alas that was the dream i could feel the impression of where your body had laid soundly in the dream but your scent did not linger nor did your heat remain on the sheets so now i close my eyes seeking to find you again […]
a swirl of color like when a match first strikes magnesium in the open air in high school i would get stoned toss strips of magnesium into the river slivers intense lines of white flame on the moving river the same river where dusty fell through the ice when we were kids all of us […]
he had sought the woman with wildflowers in her hair for so long he nearly missed the fact that she is the wildflower herself they say something of missing the forest for the trees he saw the flowers but nearly missed her lounging among the blooms he dreamt of plucking her gently by the stem […]
the sun didn’t rise this morning, as it hasn’t for the last month, doubt it ever will again ash fills the skies, acrid and still burning, the silence is punctuated by the soft hiss of burning flesh the circle of strife, end times for the casual hedonist, apocalypse in three four measure pillars of smoke, […]
until now all the angels that came into my world were no more than demons with flourescent halos making promises they never meant to fulfill false hope false prophets false profits from an ever dwindling store now there is one on my left shoulder for a moment i thought one on my right as well […]
sometimes the writing on the wall is illegible from where you are standing. sometimes it is in plain sight but you refuse to read it or purposefully misread it. but when it suddenly springs into focus you are nearly blinded by it. suddenly it is all you can see. the letters that had been scattered […]
he carved a sculpture of his love out of ice in great detail he chiseled her features painstakingly trying to capture in the frozen medium her look that set him aflame days upon days he spent out in the freezing winds to create this monument to love without end when he finished he brought her […]
i wish to learn the curves of your body like the winding country roads back home the ones i could navigate with no thought on those long summer nights of abandon to trail my fingers down your spine until it is as familiar as the feel of soft cotton bed sheets absently learn every vertebrae […]
her tears fell like diamonds to scatter amongst the fallen leaves of autumnal misery her sorrow made the angels weep to commiserate in the sullen pain of strained perfection it was as if every monet began to drip paint onto the marble floors of the museum mona lisa covering her face while sobs fill the […]
where once lay a heart now just a fist sized mass of tumors and scars a copy of a copy the original torn out consumed by ravens another jewel set to rest upon the crown that sits so lightly upon her head crowns and crows of love tinged with loss the spring wind carries the […]
accelerants bead across the walls like morning dew, soaking into the tattered wallpaper, the faded flowers begin to drip to the floor a spark, a flash, suddenly the room is on fire as the world, his world, burns to the ground around him he sits and writes of days gone by timbers fall, crash through […]
she sits in the bath the water just over her breasts bubbles obscuring her divine form beneath i sit on the floor eyes filled with hunger fighting the urge to run my fingers across that wet skin instead i clutch my phone my notebook of poetry she rests her eyes closed aware of my fire […]
one in a million just like you one in a dream just like you one in a billion just like you i need you one in a million i want you one in a billion i love you one in a dream starlight coagulates on her skin, drips down her flesh like a fantasy, when […]
everyday i wake up in a pool of my own shed blood, swimming to the edge of the bed every night i fall into slumber like a free dive from the top of niagra falls with no floaties i turn the power on with one raised eyebrow, when i snap my fingers women faint perpetual […]
let’s steal your dad’s car, get some whiskey, race down the highway too loud, too fast, no cares, leave all of the rest back on the park bench we can give our wallets to the homeless, keep a couple twenties to get gas when we run out of cash, the rubber falls off the wheels, […]
painting with pain makes the art more visceral brutal varicose remembrances clinging to the page slowly numbing the psyche at least the supply never dwindles the pallet never dries it is bottomless now it rains possibly let’s say that explains the watermarks on the page
i woke up in the middle of the night in my own bed lost that feeling has not faded where have i gone what have i become battered and bruised no less trapped here than there. i ask is there any difference. am i real. or has the fool fooled himself with the foolish hope […]
i missed you little bird in the bush outside my window you let me know the sun is rising today will be a glorious day or possibly you are complaining about the weather the state of worms in a down turned economy the lack of affordable nesting of being alone i don’t care i missed […]
and i am back in texas a week of georgia peaches and in depth classes pertaining to the last thing i care to learn a week of hotel living and strangers that became a family of misfits a week of new friends, of jay the instructor barely able to contain his laughter as i disrupt […]
thundercat whispering into my ears as the plane rolls slowly down the tarmac far above the ground, a speck amongst the specks below, so as below surely it applies to those of us daring to replicate icarus with nary a feather strapped to the waxy pallors we all wear as the turbulent air pushes us […]
she asked for my earbud, curious as to what had me hopping in my seat she looked at me with wide eyes as the ramones filled her head we sat next to each other as i taught her the joys of punk rock and hip hop she is dressed like a witch and acts like […]
taxiing down the runway, flights filled with dream and hope friday travel, headed home, a week in quiet seclusion so many smiles, except the fool, headed home to his empty apartment he watches them holding hands down the corridor, my hand reaches to the quiet void by my side end of the road, end of […]
when it came to moving from illinois to texas, i didn’t let myself think, i packed, i moved, i said good bye to my previous life it was fast, it was done like ripping a bandage off but i remember the call it was as if i had begun vibrating on a new frequency lately […]
it’s raining in atlanta, finally warm but the steady drop of water lulls me into the false belief everything will be okay today poor sleep, checked out of the room, checked out mentally, physically inaccessible to the thoughts of the day ahead twelve hours until boarding the steel monstrosity, two and half to landing in […]
alone oatmeal sits in lumps in his bowl the room is so silent the migratory business men already flying home for the weekend their fill of terrible coffee and eggs from powder told all of their tales sold all of their wares lived the greatest lie they could for four days of econoclass kingdom now […]
she painted her toenails black because she knew that always got to me dragged her fingernails down my throat, just shy of drawing blood bit my earlobe, whispered her love gently into my ear knowing it would all make a growl come up from throat sitting on my lap, squirming in just the right way […]
we sat four strangers united by the pool, different tales, far from home the fool is loud, a jester with his belled hat forgotten in the room, his heart across the ocean, his home in her smile the one is loud but hurt, trying to figure out how to move on from heartbreak the other […]
he is a peach farmer from rural south carolina rugged voice, gnarled hands from working the ground for fifty years we sit and drink shitty coffee, talking of army worms destroying crops, tying bow ties, and just how fucked up the news is these days he began wearing bow ties because the lady at the […]
i never had a head for languages, english has always been hard enough for me i am barely fluent in my native tongue now my tongue can speak in wondrous ways, ones that require dexterity and speed but foreign languages escape me i find myself wanting to learn them all to spew my wasteful words […]
i’ve been winter for so long now, freezing with my lack of emotion i’ve forgotten the kiss of summer began to dread the healing of spring, resenting the sprouting blossoms of green greedy to keep all around me coated with ice reminiscing of autumnal decay no way to live in stasis, in perpetual mourning, fearing […]
she would sit idly run her fingers through my beard hum absently as she stared out the window watching the big drops splat on the thirsty ground am i your pet, to be scratched and nuzzled she gave a wry grin nodded still humming still watching still absently playing a puppy or a cat she […]
i sat still dormant over time reclaimed by the world i had sought to vanish from lush vegetation clung to my craggy slopes still i slumbered then unbidden i was awoken she came laid her hands on the sleepy soil i tried to ignore that infusion the gentle waves of wakefulness rippling across my mind […]
Listen to razor.m4a by MEnnenbach #np on #SoundCloud
did i tell you how i had fallen for you without ever seeing your face that your heart sang to mine across the distance like two old friends across a worn table in a cozy bar recounting their lives how one time you said something it was earnest and sweet my immediate response was to […]
salesmen and auditors, lonely and away from home free beer in the lobby from five to seven, nowhere to be, nothing to do the road is a quiet place wives and kids in other states so they migrate to the fool what exactly about his ugly face invites conversation, his demeanor which screams unapproachable invites […]
the sea is rocky today rivulets of salty spray against the starboard rail on, on, ever forward towards the eastern star the sharp crack of rifle fire plumes of black smoke splintered wood on, on, ever drifting, planks of wood on the waves dead zones without current aimlessly floating ambergris bobbing Her smile beckons to […]
she is my weakness yet she gives me strength i become a bundle of bare nerves intoxicated on Her every desire
silent chewing prepackaged, frozen and set into warming trays, juice from concentrate, coffee from the deepest darkest roasted pits of hell oatmeal dried cranberries, a dash of cinnamon, a hint of milk to return moisture maybe a sausage if the mind will stop comparing them to dessicated dog shit finally unburied from the last winter […]
derelict memories, rusted variables of venomous vestiges, skimming across the manic landscapes of the myriad liveries hoarse cries reverberating through unconscious lips her tongue slashed across the final semblance of sanity like knife with tetanus carving her every desire into muscle memories of disharmonic hymnals
transcendental self flagellation to the dulcet notes of agonized screams the slapping of bloody flesh, misanthropic fairy tales of pleasure brought through the severity of pain humming a happy tune along with the skeletal bluebird outside the window a wet, persistent cough echoes throughout the hall, rheumy with a view of madness, clammy skin and […]
our tale begins like any other two people, desperately unhappy, give up on anything more a tale as old as time really it started innocently enough a fool spilled his guts out to a seeming indifferent world after yet another failure a curious woman stumbles upon him, reads deeply into his words, discovers the hurting […]
this hotel bed is too big, without another in which to share it a cloud one that doesn’t feel right alone i will clutch my pillow, pretend it is Her, the fool lost in dream when i awake, with Her scent still in my mind, the phantom feel of Her lips, Her skin pressed close […]
fatalistic not nearly drunk enough for this sober living sitting in the waiting area reading statistics about plane crashes malfunctions deviancies in maintenance routines geese sucked into the engine researching mountains in the flight path weather variances i enjoy flying just feels roughly apropos the fool is happy bound to be turbulence beware of geese
close your eyes my love, can you feel my hands upon your skin, my breath upon your neck do you hear my voice, as i whisper into your hair, savoring the smell of you as we lie here my warmth soaking into you as you push back into me, as i envelop you in a […]
she opened her ring, slipped the powder into the steaming cup of coffee a smile on her lips she offers me the mug, unaware i watched her nefarious deed i smile and take it she watches in anticipation as i gently blow on the brown liquid, declining her offer of sugar or cream my eyes […]
time and time again, the desperation led me to believe in the worm you set to float in front of me you could sense my need muddying the waters as i thrashed so the line was cast, my lip was pierced, you held me up as i spasmed in the open air i couldn’t breathe […]
like a static image through an electronic microscope, delving deep into the secrets of the abyss between vibrating forms the view through a telescope, bringing the distant landscape into unsettling real and near focus, shrinking the distances it is possible to be right next to something eons away, yet to be right next to someone […]
the wind was fire on his skin like salt on open wounds. the sun was blinding lightning through his skull. blood welled up on the stones as he pounded fists fervently howled agony at the heavens. the gods ignored his screams today like they did every other. this was penance for untold sins. forgiveness was […]
i didn’t know what was missing where this unsatisfiable hunger came from this bottomless need until you it has been so empty so cold for so long darkness draped over everything lost in my own shadow now i fear the light
the sky is gray like a razor blade peeling layers away digging deeper leaving furrows in the freshly laid silt another riverbed of self destruction another vase of roses left to wilt close the blinds blinded to the truth blended into slush bland tasteless tactless the gray sky like a razor blade severed optic nerves […]
it’s silent a hush has fallen ambient noise turned to nothing as if someone hit mute on the universe then slowly a soft sound a gentle thump woosh thump woosh thump woosh the only thing that breaks the silence your heartbeat in my head a metronome keeping time rocking me to sleep i fall into […]
woke up on the wrong side of the bed, beneath it, to be precise the sound of goldfish singing echoing through the room, the glug glug symphony bringing a sense of calm sweeping over me i stepped outside to admire the day, pre-sunrise, the moon shining up into the oceans above me a school of […]
she walks across the room and my eyes were glued to her every step i love you the words fell out unbidden she smiles that smile that all smiles long to be a soft smile that belongs on her face that smile that belongs to me just as every bit of me belongs to her […]
have you seen me i’ve put my face on milk cartons across the country, stapled to telephone poles that serve no use in this modern wireless age lost in the poor reception of polluted airwaves, filled with digital signatures and trademarked registers have you seen me the sour faced fool with a chip on his […]
i would write a poem of love for you but poems have endings and this does not, so in truth, every day shall be a continuation, a brand new ode with every fresh beginning, another chapter in the ongoing tale of impossibility a second, third, thousandth chance at defining the undefinable in which you embody […]
his bellows rattled the stone walls around me i feel the ball of string getting smaller as i try and navigate the darkened halls the bodies of the lost litter the ground crushed skulls crunch underfoot i didn’t deserve this minos and his petty punishments i’ll find my way out vengeance will be mine i […]
she lives in the future, but her presence is in the here and now, her soul is old, spread across me like this blanket covered in lions across my bed, warm and familiar with a hint of promises to come true it is soothing to be draped in the mist of the fresh morning, the […]
she sings on the branches of a once withered heart her song brings forth the sun a gentle melody that wakes the slumbering world oh nightingale oh nightingale the world is yours my love oh nightingale with plumage so pale your beauty outshines the horizon
she held me in the highest disregard, a popcorn shell lodged in her ivory teeth, a pebble in her shoe have you ever tried to grasp the sunlight, only to cause a shadow on the ground, depriving a flower of the light it needs to live to callously pluck tadpoles without giving them a chance […]
i slip in to the metaphorical because i don’t have the basis in reality to explain these quasars shooting through my brain i fall into philosophical because i cannot find the answers to the questions pounding holes inside my cavernous empty skull but i slide back to you because the light is so inviting, it’s […]
in three words she made certain my heart belonged to her it wasn’t promises of forever nor declarations of love it was so much simpler than that you are enough in those three words as if attaching wings to my heart i was hers
freedom isn’t free, it is an illusionary way of taming the herd we are only as free as the laws allow as long as we are draped with the restraints of laws, forced to pay taxes, and made to watch what we say for fear of punishment are any of us truly free animals are […]
lone tree with scarlet leaves in a verdant field of mesquite shrub i know the feel of both so well i wonder which am i
it’s a day for quiet contemplation and skull crushing pain an average day one where the birds are muted, the sky is bright, the wind blows foreign scents across the land it is a day for dreamers, lost in the heady notes of what will be it’s a day for subtle sublimation, returning to a […]
it is the tinge of sudden inexplicable need that colors my world splits the pure white beam of hopelessness into a prismatic wonderland shades i only saw in dream reflect across the ceiling changing the normal into amazement what do you see when you close your eyes, what visions sweep through your mind do you […]
spiralling like a nautilus, falling into the mollusk’s mouth grinding down the throat of the turtle, floating on the solar winds disintegrating at the thought of your touch, falling slowly apart the invisible rays bombard us, stardust makes up our souls, we are slowly falling back into whence we came, you to return to being […]
it’s been two years and still the occasional long hair peeks it’s way off the collar of a shirt trapped in the depths of the closet the same hair that tickled my nose when she leaned in for a kiss the same hair in a ponytail she would ask to be pulled it’s odd how […]
if these hands could draw, sketch the visions dancing if these hands could paint, dappled colors of the horizon if this voice could sing, the harmonies of true love if these words could speak, the thoughts pure as sunlight but there is a disconnect, between brain and body a schism, that refutes refrains, redesigns, defies, […]
a pulsating traffic jam driven directly into the aorta no less consensual a hypodermic filled with angry bees shot directly into the trachea mainlining electricity from the junction box a lightning bolt epidural two meteors on a collision course with a cantaloupe hovering just on the edge of consciousness screaming underwater in bold type italics […]
the music plays softly your face against my chest as we sway in time to the band you are a dream to me one i never thought could come true let’s dance through the night feel my arms wrapped around you my lips on your forehead as you look up at me the rest of […]
no one looks happy at the laundromat, dour faces and spinning loads faces staring at phones, children running about bored, at least the ones without phones to stare at we all air our dirty laundry at some point, why not in a building dedicated to it let the cyclical cleansing begin the dirt and stains […]
nin closer comes on the stereo, windows go down, volume goes up i have always been partial to ministry but today this song resonates something primal inside of me lack of filter, filled with need, i sing it straight to you across the void it says everything i am thinking echos that growing out inside […]
in another world lying in bed with music wasting all the day let me sing softly to you my heart belongs in your hands in another time my hand stroking your long hair your hand on my chest the sweet warmth of your body pressed so tightly against mine drifting into you the place i […]
i am lost how many pills did i dry swallow on an empty stomach while searching the room for you what day is it too many without you my head is fuzzy my brain is stuck in a loop of destitution another soundless scream written from the bowels of loneliness trapped in this repetitive prison […]
as sleep takes me, dream calls to me, a vision dances in my head, ephemeral mists sway fade away, fade away the day is just a reflection of nights cold embrace fade away, fade away fall through the pinhole in the construction paper sky fear constricts as sleep calls, dream calls with rusty chains, the […]
take my eyes, just know you accept her smile burnt into your mind take my heart, the arrhythmia taps out her name in a constant need take my soul, a lodestone that pulls in whatever direction her heart lies just burn me into ash and spread them across the ocean, let them eventually wash up […]
as he walked across the broken glass strewn all over the floor he realized it was the sound as much as the cutting that got to him like a car on a gravel road crunching shifting with every pained step the song sang softly into his ears kept him going on ever onward from one […]
i fell for you faster than the time between unclasping your bra to it hitting the floor my teeth like those of the long zipper down your skirt my breath the silken scarf around your throat my words wrapped to bind your wrists together against the headboard my intentions running up your thigh my dreams […]
the distance between screams the man i am now from who i was to who i may still become so many times i lied that i ran out of words that didn’t sing true excuses fell apart like dream in the first moments of waking now i navigate the distance between seeking the path that […]
i want to lose myself in your eyes let all the broken fall away and find the solace of your perfection it would be so easy to do most of the day is spent dreaming it, the rest wishing it were here and now what would you do if i told you that i love […]
whisper lies into my greedy ears, i will swallow them whole this hunger for anything is tantamount tell me your secrets, let me spin the finest silk of your slippery truths i will be your vault as long you remember not to feed me when the moon is full your sovereign source of stability ignore […]
ramshackle house of horrors, haunted meat suit filled with pain, logistical nightmare given shape of insular sullen sorrow today’s a day to run away dancing around the mulberry bush, the rabid monkey chased the foolish poet, on his back it sprang, he screamed out in pain pop goes the blood vessel
