can’t tell if it is snowing small crystals wafting slowly to the icy concrete or if the world is slightly granulated in the cold with this aching need for you can’t tell a lot of things in this eerie fogbank that fills the frost lined hallways in my mind i told you i love you […]
i am an empty suit of armor, a sword scabbard, a stump, a target, a thin sheen of ice along her pulmonary painstutter watching the frozen world spin backwards, every good intention reversed, every utterance of love gone unseen, unread, unwanted vitriol and virtuosity evenly decrease the viscosity that keeps my steam powered heart vibrating […]
a feeling of insignificant frustration percolates through my insular broken i miss the sun or mattering but neither are on the horizon so i clutch my aching silence tight to my chest for simple lack of anything else
the sparrow flits from branch to branch on the slow moving canal behind the industrial park that looks much the same as every other industrial park in this rundown section of the ass end of the city the mallard dives i am unsure for what unsure if he is aware of why but he dives […]
the edge of the knife carefully peels the detritus clinging firmly to this acrimony leaving a spiral indentation tracing every lost ventricle of hope. in this hollow hedgemaze of emotional hostaging all that is left are discarded rinds bated breaths and the still warm misconceptions leading away from home.
my cold tin heart beaten into form by the callously disregarded sighs regurgitated in soulless embers of these dreamscarred wispy unoblivions frozen in amethyst these alabaster lies on the subtle edge of brittle recompense left drifting alone the incidental wreckage swirling sapphire sorrows in my scarecrow brain my love is a bucket of filthy water, […]
no sun today just the miserable promise of rain and cold shivering on the couch a lack of sleep a lack of concern drifted off soundly as the alarm sounded left feeling just as unimportant as always on a below freezing morning spent staring out the window wishing softly for something more but frankly sick […]
hey dad. just me. i got my first hardcover today has my name on the spine. you’d be so fucking proud. but you don’t have a clue. i was pretty much a collosal fuck up took you dying to straighten me up by breaking me down. but i started writing. to maybe ease the ache […]
driving through a winter storm to little town texas lost in you as the windshield ices over lone sand trucks monitor the bridges the only way to combat winter in texas is to just stay home yet here i am ninety miles away at ninety miles per hour ignoring the conditions outside just feeling those […]
as the blade runs down my chest i bleed technicolor in a world of gray nothingness each droplet of spectral malfeasance poisoning the colorless painschism that exists in this contradictory hellscape of monochromatic self serving delusionary malpractices i am nothing in a world made of ashes daydreaming of her
dopesick. lovesick. shiveringallaloneinthe darknessofanotherdayin myownpersonalhellspent missing you.
the pressurebehind my eyeshas the worldin a falsesense of half speedas i struggleto containthe rapid eruptionsraging throughmy inner ear so i dothe only thingi know i throw everypiece of mybroken intoloving her letting go ofthe acheinflaming myevery otherinsipid thoughtpouring accelerantover the infernoshe igniteson my everyraging desire
the clouds are thick angrily tossed over everything and it seems the sun ain’t gonna rise today the chimes sound apathetically in monotonous tones as the coffee sits steaming and forgotten a new day begins as the pressure shifted from cheek to ear sending shivers of ache along the petulant day fell asleep with your […]
mycelium spores impregnate my collosal flaws sprouting down the empty entry of rampant remnants tearing through the essential building blocks of who i once could have been if it hadn’t been for my own inability to evolve into someone worthy of love an empty vessel interlaced by mycelium spores living in the dark untouched by […]
i am the vase, she is the flower\ i am the crack, she is the matisse/ there is a loss in transience debuffering a compression conflict lost lost lost. i am the vase, she is the transcendental wonder inherent in life i see the masterpiece hidden in peonypetals somedays love is a bed today it […]
under gray skies where even the birds don’t sing as much as scream at the utter pointlessness of it all the damned feathered rats, undiagnosed dinosaurs with hollow bones, screaming screaming squawking yelling only to have the sound bounced back by disinterested heavens vacant mothers on thunderously gray dismal squalls i sit alone building little […]
sold my soul so many times the devil won’t answer my calls sends me straight to voicemail where i ramble on incessantly about that weekend in vegas until he feels guilted into texting me back at three in the morning hoping to catch me asleep i don’t sleep it’s cold lately but in that emotional […]
her poetry wrapped itself around my throat with her silky elegance until i hung from her every beautiful word
i struggle the ache throbbing through my tender wrapped in this silent cacophony a warm cocoon struggling against this metamorphosis seeking only to become entangled in you
i am a droplet of condensation hanging solemnly from her web sunlight tickles through my supple translucency erupting ashadowplayofsoftlywhisperedodes tohersingularwonderfromwhichiam sothouroghlyensnaredenchantedby themajestyofher over her delicate beauty as she shimmers in my souldew refraction
atlas holds the entirety of the heavens upon his shoulders while i struggle through the day with this ache in my chest traveling to my skull as everything feels just too goddamned heavy for a fool alone with his thoughts if i could wrap my arms around you and forget every other aspect of existence, […]
a crack forms small at first but gradually spreading dancing down the supple subtle of sultry sanguine sorrows as i sit hearing the cry of the cuckoo still trapped in between my aching gasps illiterate alliteration the only means to pacify the persistent painful pangs of prickling pins i left myself in the pool of […]
the sun becomes binary splitting the angriest atom not content to consume itself but willing to reflect a secondary superheated ball of malice upon the already furious white caps storming the beach a watery recreation of normandy less blood and screaming more little gulps of sand as the indomitable will inherent in choppy surf meets […]
cleaned the inside of the windshield yesterday an act six months ago i could not force my broken shoulders to perform didnt realize just how clouded ny vision had been until it was no longer refracted through the residue of resinous sorrow that seemed to linger over everything now i squint into the morning’s no […]
today i lay on the ground ignoring the cold bite to make angels in ashes as the world smolders around me staring at the sky with funnel clouds pulling at the plumes of greasy smoke a big smile stapled to my face little ashen angels in a row across the yard my heart screaming out […]
wrap my heart in banana leaves fry my liver in olive oil slow roast my thighs consume every ounce of me until all that remains of my remains circulates the paradise inside of you
in a moment of foolishness i believed in myself thinking perhaps my words had value but then i saw the other lines that made you gush and i realized it was all just a goddamned lie playacting by fools pretending to enjoy every insipid word until the truth is as vacuous as everything else
she looked at me very seriously if you could be pretty or talented, which would you choose? i just laughed made it this far without being either guess i would pick the talent. she nodded yeah, pretty would be wasted on someone like you. i didn’t know what that meant just that she meant it […]
i am ugly today uglier than normal as the world is reflected in my dull gaze the sky the color of bile the clouds toxic puffs poisoning every absent thought even the birds sing as if congested with wheezing whistles the day is ugly like me uglier than normal i will avoid mirrors and windows […]
she smelled like nightshade a dab of hemlock behind her delicate ears the almondy taste of cyanide on the back of her knees sirin on her lips notes of wormwood in her salty sweat every taste worth the risk as my need outweighs the steady shaking in my weakened limbs just a side effect of […]
uranium two thirty eight courses through her smile irradiating my carbon core rearranging this insipid heart pulsating in atomic dissonance there is a mushroom cloud in her eyes that leaves nothing but ash in her wake, all i want is to burn in the purifying flames of her embrace as the world fades to white […]
no color today the world is a mass of gray tumors while i am black and white and dead inside a piece of lumber left to rot ascotmycota fester along my surreal my sublime coated in spiral angst my shell is cracked in this world without hue in this bed without you
of fables and foibles on oceans of sin, in moondust distractions and the stardust within; in flickering flames hidden in shadows cast, prismatic speculations lashed to the past; i hear the melodies as the sparrow sings, long to take flight hollow bone meanderings.
i long to feel your breath upon my lips the moment before we kiss as our mouths blossom into a soft sweet moment where everything simply stops i long to feel your breath upon my lips for in that moment i shall be complete
continuity static discharge across the binary passionwhispers of the elongated sighs reticulated in spectral benevolence on the obsidian shell of past agonies a mask of denials wrapped in layers suffocating truth with pandering lies best left to dreamashes her breath travels down my every detraction, reflecting the image of me she has planted firmly in […]
i see the harpies in the branches preening each other whispering words of encouragement for the world to see all while unaware everyone knows the game they play every unmeant compliment given builds themselves with no thought to the recipient masking the ugliness in their hearts with a manufactured facade of sweetness pulling in fools […]
the rain falls in silver daggers cutting through the detritus of a fractured sphere neon dreamshivers cascade through mercury chemtrails illuminating the tumored expanse between rhythmic heartthunders in her chromium tinted soulshatter i scream your name in the midst of dream, seeking the salvation in your arms, falling falling falling, ever into you, the world […]
i am brittle at the edges fragile this morning feeling like any sudden move will make me fall apart in this quiet apartment understanding what exactly apart means in dire need of you, my love
hey dear readers, been a bit since i checked in. i have been writing a novel, Cuckoo, since November. last night i finished it, finally. typing the end and closing that tale is a pretty big step for me. i am used to expressing emotion in around 100 words. quick tears, move on to the […]
what is a man but a collection of jagged bits rusted screws angry hornets with cured leather draped over distempered bones what is a woman but an unwritten ode of soft spoken truths in a hurricane icy daggers half dreamt scenes overlaid upon ambiguous sunsets
empty eyes stare creepily from the shadows static images pulled into distortion minor hellscapes wrapped in still frame disillusion random bells chime as the world totters on axial disinterest magnetic polecats prance along frozen sine waves shivering down faux marbled reticent refrains no matter how loudly i scream the emptiness swallows my voice until i […]
this morning is the first i can remember in weeks where the wind isn’t an icy dagger down the back of my neck so the universe mixes it up with a sullen drizzle reminding me life is not to be enjoyed without consequence early morning post office trip as an old man talked for the […]
he has been folded so many times umwanted hands taking my words then twisting them into the shape they long to see trying to turn the fool into something he never was ignoring the creases already deeply set seeking the form most adjacent to their dream when that doesnt work when he doesnt follow the […]
he wasa peculiar mana known liarperpetually betweenjobsrelationshipsdreamsa part timekleptomaniac full timelosertrying to findthat last scorethe big haulto put alifetime of bad luckto bedat long last she wasa lovely soulscarred by lifea pyromaniacflames wrappedaround her ribsprotecting herfaberge hearta hidden treasure forgottenby the betrayalsthe gamesthe agendasshe had nointerestin participating inuntilthe fateful dayshe stumbled on him he pickedher […]
some streets have too many ghosts in these small towns that are nothing more than graveyards home is a place of loss my first tooth ny virginity my innocence all those firsts to never be regained scars kisses broken hearts just another anthropomorphic ouija board running from the dead dying in small cuts mostly self […]
we snuck out the middle of the night unable to take another moment apart we didnt have a destination just a need so we went to a park and let our mouths our hands say the things words failed how long did we sit steamed up windows our fever spreading by the contact until we […]
the back hoe engine revs in the silent morning the treads seeking purchse to climb the curb to desecrate the brown grass beeping incessantly as the men stand sipping cups of steaming coffee in the too cold texas morning as i stare out the window over an empty highway daydreamilng about bed about her about […]
i dont say anything not really but i do it in a way that gives false depth use of shadow illusionary meanings left to the reader upon closer expectation a mirage always just over the next hill but truly a blank expanse asphalt illusions of brittle hope i know my limitations one track mind on […]
he brandishes a broken sword sure it is allegorical but unwilling to fall into that rabbit hole of every misspoken sentiment since the first basic moment of sentience stumbling over sensory delusion in a life sentence of broken sentences he cannot help but pick at the scabs delighted at the crimson droplets along the refrain […]
we were spending a lazy sunday lounging in bed when the call came that he was dead it’s funny knowing someone is dying yet how shocked the news of their passing still manages to be i wish i had started spilling my guts to this uncaring world that morning when i found out he died […]
art is a cesspool filled with empty words a quagmire of screaming voices begging for attention quality secondary didactically driven in false sanctimony a constant need for stranger’s validation at the expense of accidentally saying anything of value art is an open sewer filled to the brim with predatory gators always smiling as they lazily […]
one of the many lieslearned the hard waywas that lightningdoesn’t strike twiceif you were to run your handsacross the lichtenberg scarsthat trail down my chestan array of fern leavesin puckered flesheach leaf engravedwith the ghost of a smileas each blood vessel burstwith every last kisslingering dischargeacross deadened skinfaint whiffs of perfumesthe taste of salty tearsmaybe […]
insipid imitatations inspired immolations these vapid insistent instigators puffed up on self importance crows acting as ravens watching from the stands as they fumble using collanders to catch the rain not understanding what they manufacture in generic throes she simply breaths through supple prose trying to catch lightning huddled in bunkers unable to grasp beauty […]
there is anoil slickon the coffeefractalsthat prevent my lipsfrom crackingthe amorphous shellbetween wakinginto another hellor strugglingto find solacein five minuteintervallicsleepwitherswhere dreamis an elastic bandaround rusty valvesin cardiac distress i wokelooked for yourealized exactlywhat new fuckerywas being imposedby realitythen stubbornlydrank coffeewhile glaring atthe ever brightening skyintermittentpalpatationsheartshivers tremblingover the invisiblesilken webthat connectsher wonderto my sense of awe
the devil’s in the details and baby, you are in my every dream how about we make the heavenly choir blush tinge those pretty halos a sultry shade of pink ’cause if the devil’s in the details and my tongue is deep inside of you then hell sounds like a slice of heaven blanketed in […]
the only outstanding thing about him was the warrants he ran from across the country one step ahead of bondsman debt collectors a trail of broken hearts because empty promises were all he had to give as the bounty hunters search seedy motel parking lots on the bad side of whatever one horse town he […]
iris glidesdownthe prismatic infusionto fill her clay potfrom the seasher wingsno more thanscarred stubsstill try to flutteras sherefills the cloudsto bring aboutthe rainsher sorrow tingedlaughterin the dissipatingflourish ofthe arching rainbow
once a day the asian lady that lives above me goes out onto her balcony she sings words i do not understand in a soft partially broken tone like a siren that smokes heavily nicotine stained fingers her scales losing their luster singing out over the(waves) parking lot to lure a lost love home i […]
she excites a feeling of unknowing nakedness across the heartspatters that frame my willing desires of petulant flame casting off the multi-hued dispersions of aches before dancing shadows on the quiet cave walls of painted dream a momentarily [motionless sea on which we float in stasis] swept upon lingering tides of calcified lustshivers carved from […]
the last dregs of dream cling tendrils of foggy unwaking adding a hint of her held tightly to my chest in every absent thought as the coffee brews and the sky lightens outside half rapturous half agonizing wildflower petals softly spoken declarations in a haze of dreamslurry the sparrows line up to watch me watch […]
damn you damn you damn you damn you and your (egregious dreamstallionry) vociferous viper lying wait in the cool grass for a wary traveler such as i oh, yes such as i indeed for i am on to you(temptress) vapid unconcern ladled by voluptuous nymphs with moonkissed breasts swollen with promise the mistress screams from […]
shefancied herselfa queencarvingan imaginarykingdom a toxic spillblurringthe checkered board so blindedby her owninsecuritesshe sawpeopleas pieceswith nounderstandingof the mechanicsassuming anybeneath herwere all pawnseven as shepretended totreat themlike knights shefancied herselfa queenunaware historycan always tellbenevolent from bully a paper machétiaraover sad lonely eyes
the river stands still from my vantage on the bridge the waves flash frozen in place lackadaisical reminders that the things we do daily mean nothing in the grand scheme as the thick ice groans in the early morning diffusion of light through thick blanketed gray i can happily recall silent mornings listening to the […]
they judge honest reactions because they don’t feel anything but a need to be praised for their own cleverness at the expense of saying anything at all i feel the urge to speak torn away screaming to nothing while they blather endlessly felating themselves for lack of toothpicks so desperate to be seen little more […]
this morning the taste of poetry on my tongue is muted in the coffee and empty lines constructed by so called poets who barely manage to mimic the movement spasmodically arranging letters without ever touching the words dripping false sincerity in vapid lines this morning the taste of poetry on my tongue is of drowning […]
her gaze crucifies my ego against the white hot iron drawn forth from the sin in her heavenly form all that remains is the schism between rational physicality buffered between every sensual lash on throbbing need
when all is said and done my life’s works spread across the table like the legs of a dead whore i hope to be seen as ansel adams through the lens of zdzisław beksiński pure emotion strung tight in a sadists corset of sorrow’s twine not a poor man’s bukowksi with sylvia’s heart on his […]
seeking to pour myself into her padlocked heart to coalesce around the rusted tumblers seeking the right combination to unlock the love within her that screams to me in the silence between thunderous heartshivers an amateur locksmith locked out of his own perpetual longing out all night helping others escape the darkness inherent in a […]
i am tired, sitting outside the laundromat, of the indifference so causually given just exhausted from vagueries, as the line forms for the tapatia, my stomach grumbles the air is too thick with unspoken words, as i cannot navigate the ones actually spoken an empty bottle of cognac sits, a mist forming, i am not […]
it is exhausting this inexhaustible fire sucking the oxygen from the room still i burn from within the dying ember of the very first star to simply stop when i say i don’t understand, sometimes that means everything, the metaphors make it impossible to see anything but the mud caked across my tongue, i am […]
some evenings i feel too earnestlike i could spill my every secretacross the milky way in gentleprose tucked in breathy whispersto the hidden moon high abovethe clouds there is nothing to stop the floodbuilding behind the hastilyerected levees and baby, i am waybelow sea level in the absence ofyour lips upon mine and i need […]
the sky is neon gray the sun infusing the clouds with that radioactive glow that promises just less than you want need or deserve the love of a mother filtered through stinging rebukes or material possessions that leave the scars aching in the early morning chill these days sitting at the edge of a full […]
i could not tell if it was her [eyelashes] my [heart] or the very [ground beneath me] that fluttered when she made eye contact across the crowded street but for a second briefly then gone there was a mystery /a wonder/ that seemed to suffuse the still world in the(golden nimbus)of dream as if nothing […]
on dreary days like this the thought travels with every stinging lash of ache maybe i died expired just a spectre of promises dashed malingering in this too big bed staring up at an uncaring ceiling for eternity the ache an anchor keeping me tethered to a plane where i never truly existed outside sirens […]
i added gingerfreshly shavedto the coffee groundsthis morningan agonized skullthrobbing alongto the piteous whineof valves half rustedin my chestmy gutsfeel like an empty nettrailing behinda trawleron an ocean ofinsipid deathpullingpartially dreamt dreamsto the harborwhere all poetseventually end upon a benchas their ink flakesinto the seaof salty indignationfor words never read
there is anache it seemsto beginin my leftshoulder bladewhere it knotsalong my neckbefore stabbingdirectlyinto my brain a red hot bladethrough the butterygelatinspiked withchemicalsdelusionsand other sundry things but it begins withan ache somewherein that gapwhereif i werea real boymy heart wouldhangin an ivory cageinstead of thissawdust sackfeebly spinningin condemnation
crystal leavessway beneaththe lavenderbinary sunsrefracting the raysinto a monochromaticarray of inverseprismatic dismayas shadows spawnin triplicateover sulfuric streams
listen as the sheep bleat in the caref ully mani cured pen hark your newest(silver haired)messiah more familiar with /burningbush/ than bible”quotes” chase chase chase that american gleam in the eyes of the worm chewing slowly through the fetid core the nightmare in the rotted corpse of flatulentdream so begins the[latest]chapter of unraveling constitutional comeuppance […]
it cannot be considered drowning if it is his own hands holding him under the surface is it suicide he insists if you can’t recall having lived the sky is always fucking gray and he cannot tell if it is following him or if he is causing it in the simple sin of existing in […]
i listenin the silencefor thattelltale hearthis glass eyestaring at mein dreamwhile he beggedme to not placethe last brickbefore the housesplit asunderand all that remainedwas the windcalling her namethe ravens peckingat the dooras the nobles burncovered in pitchbeneath the chandelierof gold bugsand apescommiting crimesmasques and amontilladoall swirlin the madnessthat itchesthe back of my brainin poem and […]
she held a string that impossibly wound itself around the knot at the bottom of the moon i looked admiringly at the gossamer thread seemingly woven of platinum dreamwhisper that held the satellite far above dream or heaven or any other man made lie
today was not a very good day for being human exhaustedballofmiserableanxiety hitting the fuck off switch on a terrible day
he walked in with an aquarium in his hands set it on the bar ordered a draft reached in his pocket pulled out a small can which he tapped carefully over the fishbowl likely there is a story there but i find my interest diminish as the idiotic thing chases the multicolored flakes i’d talk […]
sorrow is a cornerless cube sharp for its smoothness joy is a jagged sphere clutched tight in bleeding hands
it seems to me general custer was an average looking man with an exceptionally extravagant mustache but incompetence is a poor look for even the finest coiffed of would be perpetuators of genocide now a half remembered punchline dead as gravedirt but a damn fine mustache indeed
each dandelionhas an evil eyesurroundedby soft petalscrying pollenatedbrimstone tearsunblinkingas the windblows throughthe nightmare fieldof fetid daydream
the world demandsits pound of fleshbut i am badat conversionsso i setmy heart on the scalein time for sobekto snap me updeemed unworthyas the sands swirlbeneath thisphotonegative delusion
don’t wish upon me i am nothing more than an obsolete satellite burning up upon re-entry just a sad excuse for real crying while listening to sad songs sitting miserably at the corner of anxious weariness and charging windmills
being different is something to be respected to be channeled embracing thinking angularly rather than shunning what is not understood it can take shape as a myriad of mental maladies excused by chemical imbalances brought on by trauma regulated medicated encouraged to try and just be normal but maybe through a different medium the miswired […]
every night the neighbor drops something the same something i assume it is his phone but sometimes in the middle of sleepless nights i wait to hear it fall to know i am not sleeping seconds tick by in strange dilation when the world outside is silent the tocks do not seem to equal the […]
i have lain still unmoving unbreathing through an evening where fhe world went completely silent no traffic no planes no wind through the chimes just my pulse in my ears i thought at first have i gone deaf am i asleep merely dreaming i lie awake blanketed in quiet i go outside it is cold […]
wesley was fromanother plane of existencea schizophrenicthat madesimplestrange songsyou couldn’t helpbut smile duringand he wouldheadbutt his fansso there wasnothingnot to loveabout the earnest poettelling storiesabout urge overkill showsor rock and roll mcdonaldsscream, dracula, screambeguiling simplicityhiding the geniustrapped behindhis madness rock over londonrock on chicagowesley willis, chicago’s secret poet
we occupythe momentsbetween notesas ryo playsin the silencebetween heartbeatsthe instant beforethe synapse sparks slow dancingwith youas the worldstares at the high-hatshiverunaware of anythingbut you andthe wildflowers in your smile
went to the palm reader in the barrio searching for a bit of direction in a rudderless world she looked startled as i entered the room as if i was the one thing she hadn’t expected to see the candle flames fluttered in the chill breeze as she gestured me to the open seat across […]
i strip back so much i wonder at my own insubstantiality the breeze rustles through my ribcage making my dessicated lungs flutter like wooden chimes against my stillheart silt and dreamshards scattered in a rough approximation of where a fool once sat my skin spins on the breeze like trash on the side of the […]
goose feathers fill my stomach (pickled lies) sit fully formed behind {my maggot lips truffled denials in my [snout] nothing behind my \charcoal\ stare but simmering incompetence elephant ears frame acro-magnonbrow the incredible melting manroasted on the flames of living up to his actual potential as a stain on the carpet on the waiting room […]
i watched as he stumbled unsure what was happening it seemed he grappled with spirits beyond the scope of my reckoning then he fell his head striking the concrete his scalp cracking like an eggshell i watched the lines race over his face frozen in fear before the first piece of porcelain fell unleashing a […]
agitatedtoday easilyfrustrated start stopstutter thoughtsflightyas a caged bird i see the wordsbut the lossin translationcomes in the disconnectbetweenbrainheartandquill
another feat of self medication in an effort to drown out the voices reminders of every failure every fallen tear down cheeks i only ever intended to kiss the light fragments off each slowly sliding droplet encapsulating the unintentional hurt torn through the pumice of passions extinguished another feat of pained dedication to the smiles […]
it was the horn soundingthat finally took mefrom holding you closeback into the cold roomalone and dejected the battery half deadthe sound distortinginto a mocking squawksounding out through the quietstretched into anguish the pillow clutched closeno longer my lovejust a rapidly cooling reminderof the oblong natureas dream fades to reality no matter how i positioneven […]
