2538

the needle just pops and hisses at the end of the record stuck in the dusty groove unhappy with the last song played but stuck with the memory of it into perpetuity the curtain hangs heavy in front of the stage with no one left to pull the rope no more crowds waiting in gleeful […]

father(s day)

the world shreds the weak grinds bone into dust leaving sinewy strands scattered across the pavement it takes and takes without ever giving back forcing us to forge through move forward push on when giving up giving in is the only acceptable alternative then something happens changes the entire game shifts the paradigm that first […]

aproprose III

Two slices of toast. Lightly buttered. A steaming cup of coffee. A small glass of juice. He keeps eyeing his phone. Fingers twitch with need. His face emotionless. He sits rigidly in the chair. The birds still trill a song of life and light. Another car starts. Another. He sits with trembling fingers. He swipes […]

aproprose II

The birds sang a sunrise affirmation from the trees and bushes. An engine roared to life with a sputter. He lay, staring at the ceiling as the world awakened around him. He closed his eyes and waited for the alarm to go off. This was his new normal. The birds, the cars, the alarm and […]

aproprose

The sky was gray in ambivalence to the procession beneath. Fat drops of rain fell with abandon as the coffin was slowly lowered in the six foot hole. The world was dreary, unwelcoming to light or to color. Even the single rose, crimson petals on the dark wood, was faded in the down pour. Long […]

breathe

before i saw you you made my heart skip beats when i finally gazed upon you i developed arhythmia it is your heart beat that fills the spaces your inhale that allowed me to exhale at long last how long had i held my breath while searching it was worth every jagged ache of pain […]

light

sunlight filtered through coffee sorrow tinged by joy day turns into long night spent staring at the ceiling aches course like acid spikes driven deeply the dull throb of another tormented soul where does it go this endless misery when it evaporates from a host does it find another to take root within or spin […]

doubt

not sure if the words are broken or if i am but the steady trickle has been replaced by doubt doubt doesn’t do trickles it only knows how to flood

cyclical nature of ever expanding distance

dream turns to waking waking turns to dream sleep turns to confusion in a broken kind of state rain slicked neon streets an alley in my mind each step brings my goal one step farther away let the lightning strike me the thunder shake my very core one foot in front of the other ever […]

untarnished

out of sorts out of shorts short changed changed my mind minding the store storing away the insolence of another new day fumbling for the words science diction webster’s fictionary a tome of subtle lies lying here creating worlds of words as the knot in my throat the slipknot around my trachea traces subdermal hemotoma […]

phantasmal seas

the sun didn’t shine down through the leaves it went prismatic as it burst around the crystalline tools of photosynthesizing reality into palatable pieces of energy above soar winged mares of daylight personified on the breath of sleeping giants whose bones make up the mountains and heartbeat heats the cold soil the princess is in […]

fever(ish)

huddled in a ball with my little stuffed cow it’s bedtime but neither of us feels like sleeping the ceiling seems so far away the wall is uninviting my eyes feel dry as my head is stuffed with steel wool so tired i cannot sleep so hot i feel like i am freezing come closer […]

sunk

my paper thin soul tore in the breeze of fermented failings my sense of self worthlessness seems insurmountable today i am lost, listless, languishing in lilac daydreams in an ocean of sorrow, the tides seek to pull me under but natural buoyancy keeps my nose just above the surface of foam tipped waves of heady […]

Tuesday is like

moth chewed soul like swiss cheese in the caves in the south of france brain damaged from slamming against the built in roll cage of another car crash scar tissue raises like the mountain ranges on the face of a globe in a dusty library bitterly sad like lemon rind grated on the smiling face […]

of hounds and hares

the hounds bay at the rabbit affixed to the rail another false prophet profiteering in misery the hounds howl with drool flecked muzzles above windsor knotted ties clamoring for the scent of sense and cents and sex the rabbit runs electrodes charged stuffed with shredded dollar bills he isn’t quite sure if he is hound […]

he feels like

an old shoe box filled with little packs of desiccants covered with dust like the heart of an old sailor who has forgotten the feel of another’s lips

sinplicity

hell is a reward for a life half lived, heaven is reserved for those who could muster enough to crawl across the finish line an amateur demonologist with a minor in third degree burns studying the affect of cages and hearts on tempered urges death is for the living while dying is sport for some, […]

vaccuum

everything i love is so far removed from my grasp i cling to space like a drunken astronaut untethered from his ship spiralling in the vacuum that surrounds him

fasting

fasting all day driving too fast with no brakes no breaks the only thing breaking is news of my eventual demise dem eyes that stare as i fall down the stairs laissez faire unfair the blue ribbon ceremony at the county fair prize winning whining winging it flying over the steering wheel wheels up in […]

a list of hopes

i hope you hit your little toe on every corner that when you use the mustard bottle all that comes out is liquid same with the ketchup i hope everyone mispronounces your name and has to ask who you are every time they see you may every piece of wood you touch give you a […]

woke up

woke up with a head full of spiders, i feel them crawling about in my sinuses, spinning webs inside of my brain woke up with a soul full of maggots, blind grubs burrowing all the way down, feeding on the torments of a man gone insane woke up with a stomach full of moths, flying […]

whole

i was half a tattered photo fluttering with no home a chalk drawing in a thunderstorm on the sidewalk a candle on the mantle near an open window struggling to burn until you i was a half finished manuscript that had been forgotten on a shelf the fading remnants of dream as the alarm clock […]

sketching

i’ve been sketching more lately trying to perfect my summoning skills upon the page bought colored pencils new paper graphite erasers everything necessary but talent if i can get the geometry just right maybe it is possible to tear an opening from here to you every sweeping line across the blank page ticks another second […]

cuore della luna

she sleeps on a silken bed in the heart of the moon i stare into the sky to catch her errant dreams anything to be part of her mindscape even as a spectator faceless behind the scenes art by me

kiss me dreadly

blurred vision aching head pulse pounding sense of dread running full speed into the glass walls of this prison, on repeat until crack form in the sheer terror of this hell, falling as shards like razors rain through the sky around me, uncontrolled descent into a decent ending for a life of wasted moments i […]

Site News

My little blog has lost the horrid name it has been saddled with since it’s inception. Welcome to mennenbach.com, same manic words, new shiny label. My best friend in the world has been coaching me and helping me to try and extend my reach as a real poet/writer. I don’t have the words to show […]

serpentine kiss

she moved with a sinuous grace one that hypnotized the unwary prey her lips puckered into a kiss that was a fatal ruse as the venom courses nothing matters anymore serpentine tongue tasting as fang pierces lip art poorly drawn by me

knotted

my brain is a raisin in the sun today, the words have squeezed until nothing is left inside my skull but the rattling of insignificance my heart stammers, my tongue twists, i am letting it all build to a stuttering climax before unleashing them on an unsuspecting world the release i require is unrelenting in […]

night sky

the world has gone quiet and i lay across the bench under the stars in the warm texas evening the light of the city washes out the milky way except for the orion and leapus and canus but i still try and play connect the dots as if the grandeur were not missing from the […]

disenchantment

staring at the world through an aquarium lends a distorted quality of depth and ill perceived perception every mirror i stare into is a fun house view of dysmorphia brought on by an inability to see myself through another lens i slow dance through the motions of club footed polio inflicted musculature intricately sketched by […]

emergency contact

i made you my emergency contact after i dreamt i was killed in an accident last night i didn’t care about my death, that is something bound to happen at some point i imagine all i could think about was you not knowing, thinking i vanished, ghosted you in the wrong way so i made […]

choose your own fool

painting with arterial sprays, writing with ocular fluid as ink, brachial nerve, bronchial tubes, in pieces this body is art stitch me back together, in whatever form fits your mold, hack the bits you don’t want in the trash i am yours to do as you see fit, to be made to fit, in fits […]

delightful

can you drown on dry land plummet to the earth from underground soar with your feet remaining grounded run while paralyzed with inner turmoil anxiety tells me everything is wrong depression tells me it is all bad yet i cock my head towards the sun set one foot in front of the other it hasn’t […]

no poet

i am no poet i am a polecat, a pretender, a platypus jabbing himself in the side with poison barb, a placating penny store philosopher, a self plagarizing self aggrandizing self unaware, pompous prehensile tail of a writer but i am no poet i am no writer i am a wayward soul lost in the […]

crimson

she turned to me with a faint smile, trails of blood running down her chin, delight at war with discomfort in her eyes i leaned in to kiss her as she ran her tongue across bloody lips, she smelled of citrus and pennies as she gripped the sides of my face her tongue ran across […]

your name

whisper your name into my ear so i can learn to say it with the intent of summoning you to my side wherever you may be etch your name across my ear drum so every word i hear from now until forever is colored by your presence in my mind trace your name across my […]

five points on the cemetery gate

I. in the bloom of the black rose, left to wither on the vine, untended by hands weary from thorn pricks, crimson hints beguile the blossoming scent II. the cracked tombstone, weathered with faded carvings, the grass gone brown, plastic flowers bleached white as the bones buried six feet below III. a soft song fills […]

sinuous

you glide upon wings of redemption stained black by the weight of my sins the sin eater sat with a bowl of ale and a crust of bread, absorbing the misdeeds of the dead, black teeth stained with tar from the multitude of evil deeds taken in you glide my brown eyed beauty i follow […]

rusted

floating blindly into the flash fires of eternity grab the back of my head push it down beneath the docile water lethe no coins for the ferryman no value no deposit most certainly no return from this lazy river cerberus snarls three sets of eyes follow my every move the gates of hades are locked […]

seen

little spider on the camera done watching me watch her scurry across the smoked dome advertisement blowing in the breeze across the empty parking lot multi colored to entice overcast as the fog distorts the shape of the city into a hidden land of giants made of glass there is a grit to the air […]

week off

i have taken the week off of writing long form stories too many ideas rattle around insufferable suffocating sensual sin drenched words poetry will have to suffice the need to spill all over the sheets of blank desire how did i live before this outlet before you a half life nothing more nothing i will […]

whispering

sitting alone as the sun shines benediction onto the flowers, the light flickers through the trees, dances on my face whispering poetry to the world around me, words falling as they will from thick lips and heavy tongue to the breeze did the real poets do nonsense like this, sing song lyrics, meaningless and mumbled […]

(i)therefore

i spiral like a nautilus ever winding inwards i flare like a match book with slight light for a short burst i sob like the lost phantom hands grip my heart i dream like a child with hope in the hopeless i smile like the end of the world with no knowledge of endings i […]

the point

tomorrow ends the regularly scheduled classes, an end for her days as a carefree youth the next adventure is high school i worry i am less prepared than she for the momentous hurdle my awkward years are still going strong as she becomes a capable woman how did she pass my level of maturity at […]

incarnate

i am a force of natural destruction, a cyclone of lust incarnate a fluffy cloud of gentle loving, the azure sky of pure emotion overhead golf ball sized hail rattling off the rusted tin roof of self collapse endlessly misting rain like a lover’s embrace dancing across your bare skin thunder in the distance with […]

ganz entwirrt (unraveled whole)

ich werde in deiner gegenwart enträtselt, die teile von mir, die einst ganz waren, spulen jetzt über den boden wie weggeworfene fadenstücke (i become unraveled in your presence, the parts of me that once were whole, now spool across the floor like discarded bits of yarn) ich werde in deiner gegenwart wiedergeboren, die teile von […]

voice

the last thing i heard before my ear drum burst was your voice echoing inside my head so now it is no wonder that half deafened your song sings with no escape from the cavernous skull when i block my right ear all i head is the ocean gently rolling as the tide comes in […]

by

in the echoes of memory stand the ten time ten daggers of heartregret the ancient wounds of unreclaimed reticence in the junkyard of broken hearts lie the eight time eight monuments to monumental failure drawn in honeyed dream in the hospital of whispered odes sing the six by six bloodwound choirs that scream inchoate rage […]

feng shui

i burnt all of my belongings yet found no peace i tore up all my writings yet the feeling persisted meditation, self flagellation, administration, defenestration, a prayer called in desperation in a last act before ending this farcical facade i stumbled upon feng shui i reorganized the ashes the scraps of paper yet the feeling […]

to come

the air has that hint of summer misery a sweltering promise of heat a blistering hint of hell to come wavy lines of distortion mirages in the distance as i stare out the windshield in dread

lost in the forest

i left a trail of breadcrumbs so i could retrace my steps following the splatters of bird shit behind me discarded feathers from the murder of crows as they peck the eyes out of common sense in these desolate woods the only grim tale of horror that matters is the one where this world is […]

untitled 2483

my heart warbles in off key hymnals to your beauty my soul shines like a flickering neon sign in response to you my mind flops like a puppy at your feet unable to contain itself bruised battered bent all of me stands straighter to just get a glimpse of you

morning exaltation

i pour my misery into a fluted glass and raise a toast to the stars that fade from the sky i pour my sorrow into a pint glass and raise a toast to the to the moon that slowly disappears i pour my heart onto the crinkled vellum and raise an eyebrow to the indifference […]

we rewrite reality into the shape we choose

every second is a paper cut along the edge of my soul where the aether bleeds into space draws the distance between binary hearts together tightly as one a tenuous river of emotion that begins ends with us alone irregardless of quantum mechanics or physical laws science is just magic in our new realm of […]

undoing

let loose your arrows drawn back like the tongue of the serpent unleash the wordswarm of thine own undoing to blacken the skies with barbs of insipid noise

inward

the sense of self lost in the dense foliage of shiny plastic trees an aluminium age plastic pressed tightly onto every petroleum based wet dream this craven sense of self hiding among the fevered topical depressions of tropical regressions of passive aggressions of unsettled fears demanding recompense for recollection agencies that never forgot to tax […]

hidden

there is beauty in the concrete mess of the city if you keep your eyes open for it i found a field of flowers that looked like a sea of bees happily swaying in the breeze while i sat watching the birds as the ambulance sped past me

silent destiny

she smiled at me as i walked in with my tool bag she said she had been waiting on me being a technician makes you either a devil or an angel, hero or villain today starts with a halo resting jauntily on my horns she said follow me as we shook hands my name is […]

beach

the wind blows off of the calm ocean she rocks on a hammock between two palm trees a plate of cucumbers and celery on the small bamboo table as the dolphins play on the waves she smiles with a face of serenity a smile that makes the world brighter for witnessing it does she see […]

a rush of

blood flecked saliva drips down another shattered dream two black eyes a crooked nose scabs in place of feelings take your withered hopespring cast it into the well of lies like all the other pendulous tragedies that harbor grief in wooden horses outside the gates of joy

all it took was everything, in that moment when

it was that moment when all hell broke loose that order seemed like a brilliant ideal to pursue when sorrow broke the dam then threatened to flood the plains of indescribable joy with salty tears it took a riding crop to the soft bits to quench the fires of wrath that threatened the countryside it […]

sleeplessness

simplicity is an iron wrought anklet drug behind the dingy floating on the storm tossed oceans of melancholia sleep deprivation draws the ravens to circle, black eyes search for sun bleached bones in the desert sands of loneliness three uninterrupted hours of dream in exchange for the listless meanderings of a fool filled with anxious […]

(un)titled totes

It was this gooey glue that never let one seperate into two twinses twinkling in a display that makes toes curl silken petals on a bed of thorns that was foretold long ago of porcelain dolls created in a pod that spins dream into gold

feeling real

only when i run hands upon your image, when my mind rests in your shadow do i feel real myself have i ever told you how beautiful you are, how my heart stops beating, my brain forgets how to breathe, my hands tremble or my teeth find my lower lip as i gaze upon you […]

x

sitting on a curb watching the city race around me stern faces avoid eye contact i smile to make them uncomfortable silly bastards it’s overcast it’s always overcast lately better that than the never ending summer sun baking the life out of the land i stare at the x on the road where kennedy got […]

gardener

whisper your dreams let me catch them in this burlap satchel to spread the seeds as i drive across the city every fantasy wish and hope tenderly cared for in groves up and down the dirty streets i have never been a gardener but i will ply a new trade to see the vastness of […]

one

she felt like a satin draped coffin as i slid into her the thought made me pause a mixed metaphor that struck a chord in my mind in this act of love making i felt myself dying in pieces as i gave all of myself to her i was inexplicably changed the man that began […]

knife

with bloody fingers i hand you the knife as my life spills from the many paper cuts inflicted in this tornado of raw emotion it seems only fitting if this life is fading for you to be the one to end it the pain the suffering the need one last act of kindness look into […]

if you

if your ear were next to my lips i would kiss it and whisper my love softly as i fall asleep if your mouth were next to mine i would kiss you as passionately as the rain kisses the dry ground if your head was on my chest my heart beat would sing a lullaby […]

dreamspit

the slimy tentacles of time slither among the driftwood of consequences hail to thee oh bearded bastards of angst immemorial hail hail forsaken the dreamspit the splinter in the eye of fate the waste water rapids of youthful indiscretions rancorous is the need in the face of patience rancid is the respite between here and […]

blue and red

when you contacted me out of the blue so long after our last contact had left me feeling blue i felt the tingling of suspicion creep across my soul to trail freezing blue fingers down my spine our last talk had made me see red my face was flushed with anger all i could see […]

birds

the world outside is flooded, reclaimed by the lakes, remnants of the glaciers that once carved this land ages ago it is just the birds and i lars sings about yugoslavia being blown to bits, she’s looking to the west, she’s trying to look her best the birds don’t care, this is their land now, […]

park

the park is quiet for such a lovely day the sun is shining the wind is light and feels good across the freshly shaven skull her image is all i can see her smile is the sun her whisper is the wind all i could want yet here i sit watching life go by around […]

growth

looking back i see an incomplete version of the fool to come searching for what he was not ready to find through the pain of it i realize it took more pain more need more longing to get to the me that is ready for a new growth spurt i will never stop evolving but […]

pray

i pray with doll hands clenched tightly in my fists a rosary of spent shells a crucifix that has seen too many last fixes a burnt spoon a crusty needle empty baggies with residues of days spent lost i pray with indecent devotion the belief of a magician the truth of a trickster the hope […]

loco-motiveless

he flapped his lips like an epiglottis in perpetual loop none of the things he said carried any weight yet the gravitas in which he spoke them beguiled like the steam whistle on a train in the middle of nowhere riding the track towards the end of the line a controlled study on uncontrolled radio […]

finished tale

i feel like a half gnawed apple core tossed onto the side of road and left to fester with ants on my corpse a mouth eaten flag waving limply in the breeze a cipher indecipherable overly complex for such a simpleton whenever i finish what i set out to do i am left drained of […]

nesting

even in the quiet moment of reflection the memorydagger stabs through the curtain of fond remembrance to shred the veil into paper dolls of pain past insidious mental scars like matryoshka dolls nesting in each puckered line harken thee unrepentant spirit flee the hallowed halls of dusty relic take root within another dried nightmare

help

i’ve been trapped in this escape room for days now no clues as to how to find the exit i’ve torn everything apart in frantic need to leave in my mind i know it is my living room but that living hasn’t occured in it for so long it is a subsisting room a room […]

ants

mastodon playing in my functional ear as i sit in the drizzle watching people watch me watch them foot tapping to the beat phone in my hand, thumbs tapping along with the wailing guitars they wander lost in their own daydream as i daydream new lives for them moments like this i think of the […]

indistinct

a culmination of events a fractal shifting kaleidoscopic nuance bedazzled with extraneous narratives from the fourteenth dimensional fracture it pieces together slowly, but not beginning with edges and corners an ink blot rorschach vision from italian horror directors trapped in a blizzard in the desolate wastelands of pluto’s elliptical orbit the pressure so intense it […]

time travel

orion’s belt sits sagging across the waist of the sky above me as i wish to travel forward into the future to lay next to you fifteen hours ahead seems like an easy feat for this amateur bender of time just need to strap on my thinking cap and make it happen

picnic

her naked form covered in pollen that clings to every curve of her perfection the sun dances upon her skin as my tongue plays down her spine like a a silken hammer along the xylophone keys of her vertebrae her tailbone signals the eventual plunging into the simmering waters of her desire how her moans […]

gaze

into your eyes i cast the net of my gaze in hopes of capturing a hint of the light you so effortlessly shine onto my mind my head was filled with the headstones of hopes long dead before you razed the top soil of decay exposing fertile earth once again

meaning

i sometimes grow concerned worried you don’t quite know what i mean when i say i love you that you hear the words flash back to sweaty teenage need or hear all of the times it was spoken but turned out to be a lie when i say them it is all encompassing it is […]

my name

speak my name bind me to your tongue let my longing snake throughout your mind entangle your dream call my name let it ring in the sullen night let the feel of my fingers slide down your soft flesh say my name in hushed whisper so i may find you in this maze of hedgerows […]

one winged

the one winged raven like silver maple seeds spins in the vast azure above a feathered cyclone whipping dirt stinging the chafed skin of ruddy cheeks i squint into the sun to stare without knowledge as the raptor grows closer inquisitive yet filled with fear black feathers like daggers slice i let my arms fall […]

for that

i see her not with eyes blinded by the world around but with a newly awoken third eye that cuts through the detritus of this modern age of shame filled lies with a sense of connection magnetic otherworldy in scope it slices the rejoinders the epidermis to expose the hidden layers of truth buried in […]

ode to spring

on mulberry leaves we float upon the winding streams of fornever into the heart of spring where stars flicker like candles at dusk the caterpillar gorges itself to become a mouth less moth

pieces

you drift along the ever changing landscape of my mind an echo a fragment inserted in my every thought a piece of you remains prevalent as if you were always an important part even before i was aware of your existence

(un)titled surrender V

it’s the unwritten pages of this manuscript that hold my attention the blank pages that call my mind the poems unspoken the future as yet unfolded so many words spent pining for what was thought unreal turned to reality now i share my quill with her hand letting her help design how the words sing […]

absolution

she walks across the room absolution in her every step turning the pages of my unread novel with effortless grace i am transfixed upon her every mood lost in her eyes

garden

what if the words you had written in the depths of breakdown of desperation of hopeless dream what if those words found purchase in the soil sprouted into a plant bear fruit bear blossom could you would you take a bite of the apple of your misery smell the fragrance of your desire i have […]

guide

to your right lies the caverns of savage indignation to your left the stars shimmer cascade like a dream i stand betwixt one hand holding each at bay let my smile guide us into the ink spots of eternity

attention

what brought us together shakes the earth apart as if incapable of comprehension that which tore us apart is bespectacled amusement in the sad eyes of porcelain dolls standing raptly in uniform attention