feeling inconsequential in a sequential pattern of repeating selfdetrimental implosions along my cardiac redaction today is a day for screaming silently into the plastic world filled with distracted emotive disconnections echoing back milquetoast inflections my anterior cardiac infraction directly correlates to the relapsed dismality that is only found in store brand miseries i long to […]
drowning in it today just my middle finger extended to let them know that even as i sink this is my choice not due to her or her icy fingers rearranging my guts into a knotted self indictment on the pressures of isolation in the heart of depression always leave them wondering as the corpse […]
the flame flickers a small ball of yellow suspended above the wick a boa of black smoke coalesces around the breath of fire long tears of melted wax run in rivulets adding to the girth of the whole while ignoring the steadily shrinking waxen stature the room itself alive with mercurial shadows that change the […]
she had anatlasprinted onthe sheetsso every timewe made loveit wasa global eventmy handsand hungry mouthexploringa differenthemispherefrom the onewhere shemoaned aloudin tectonicdivisions ofshifting ecstasy
the fine print on the contract for one tattered soul in exchange for drowning in an ocean of diction never mentioned grinding your softest bits to dust to make the ink the heartthistle quill imbued with a breath swollen with broken sobs barely held back the magician doesn’t show the audience how the trick is […]
my eyes opened too early this morning as the overwhelming desire to run my tongue along your sorrow to let you infuse your beauty so that every taste bud carries a reflection of your magnificence carrying a hint of the storm brewing at the edge of your horizon where the darkness flickers to tinge the […]
every photo is a caricature where the exaggerated dejection burrowed into the furrowed brow is but a reflection of hyper distended incomprehension madness in vacant eyes scars squirm fat coarse cords sewn in haphazard{x’s} by heavy handed[exes] to keep the palemaggotskinnedlips firmly pressed together keeping the declarations (un)spoken the ugly bastard waiting for the seeds […]
living in images is great for writing poetry but bad for a life lived alone filled with insufferable longing. we get what we get. doesn’t really matter what we want.
thismolten worldof sinconspiresto drown mein themucked aboutmaligneddribbleof unintentionalmalaise
today is cloudy heavy with the promise of winter kissing the back of my neck as the winds whip dead leaves like so many what could have beens in a series of messages from the aether to reprogram my deficient selfless understanding as to the complex calculations that seem to leave me on the short […]
the mechanical man trundled slowly to the outskirts of town careful to remain in the woods away from accidental eyes away from despising stares black smoke rising from the furnace in his belly driving his steam powered heart the treads on his feet slowly sinking in the soft loam as he watches the happy people […]
she found me in a pawn shop standing in front with a note that read free to a good home i did my best puppy dog eyes dreading another night kennelled in the back room that smells like cheap cigars and stale flatulence with a heavy dose of melancholic misplaced affections she gave me a […]
the only beauty i can find in the world this morning is in sylvia’s words and the wildflowers in your gaze i got up on the wrong side of the bed fell into a mobius loop of constant waking then stumbling into the negative space between thought and action it is cold yet the bitds […]
damn the truth!damn the wretched truth! she was a vampyre!she was a nymph,cast in dusky brown!foul succubus! on my kneesi beseech thee,oh lord above!spare me fromthese ignoble slights! cast thisfoulest demonbackback to bottomof the fiery pits!to hell!to tartarus! just allowthis poor foola momentof succorfreefrom the dinof yourmost foul harpy,i implore thee
my mental acuityhas hamperedmy emotional growthas a defense mechanismagainstearly hatred shown the words thatdieon my tonguefly freeonly in verse i worrymy mute expressionismthis screamingin silentsolitudewill always denythe infernoof passionthat flaresbehind eyesno one everglances into
it occurs to me that no matter how deeply dreamt or fervently wished the things that i want aren’t required for me to survive just to live so i exist in the pedantic lines of unread poetry a half alive spectre standing in the snow peering through the large window as the lovers curl up […]
one day i will cover all my scars become unvisible just some ink stained walking rorschach test that reminds you of your parents fighting or your father’s penis or that time you walked in on them mid-coitus just a vague unsettling feeling at the edge of perception beaming smoke signals in sultry flashes of sinful […]
i can’t remember exactly what it means to be me anymore because me has always ended up being the worst thing about me
today it feelsas if i ama strangerin my own lifea guided missilelaunchedbut unableto do anythingsteeredby invisible hands unableto speakto act a controlledout of controlexperiencethat leadsonly to mytriumphantexplosioninto a showerof nothingin the landof words
she started tocall mea cuckoo clockbecausein our fewdaily interactionsit becamea seriesof repetitive talksas she pulledfather backi hadonly so many chancesto speak but it dawnedon methat i was nevera painted birdin a wooden box i have thisgreat needto sharethe lovethat boilswithin mymetallic framea tea kettleset upon the fireof yourperfectionunable to doanythingbut shoutadoration
i didn’t wake upthis morningas sleepnever managedto quite workits way aroundto my quiet hell lost in thoughtsthat spunon and onuntil the alarmblared a soundof sullen defeatinto the room i feel exhaustedbut it doesn’t quiteovertake the sorrowthat has bubbledto the surfacegurgling tarin quicksand sleepy
i just need medication to combat this desolation of enforced isolation my mental deviation lends itself to this abbreviation of insular emotional deviation even the birds give me fuck off stares as i pass them, beady eyes staring daggers into my own crooked maw of self destructive ambiguity and i am tired so very tired […]
prometheuswas the firstarsonistandmy head feelsstuffedwith angry spidersso as far asgood morningaffirmations gotoday isnot the dayif yourmagic eight ballsays differentlyshake ituntil the blue liquidgets sobubblythe message readswhateveryou want itto sayor wait untilthe eaglefinishes offfire boy’s liverchuckthe plastic seerinto the flaming eyeof the gods ownpenancemy brain feelsspideryit is far toocoldwhen i miss youthis much
once while riding across the cobblestone streets of the farmers market, astride a purple dodo with a regal beak despite a rather peculiar aversion to trolleys the ebony tears of the matrimonial dissidents cascade like tar from the pockmarks running along the veins of the last vestige of peace or love a woman in a […]
once i rode on an aeroplane a wheezing creaking wooden thing with brass gears wings like a bat that flapped in manic delight as the pilot pedalled furiously a small man, no more than a foot tall, tossed coal into the furnace that belched black smoke as the hot air inflated large sacks sewn from […]
this glasshouse bone prison comprising of the chemical deficiencies that form the pilot of the decaying meat golem spitting sounds that vibrate tiny bones in fine canals filled with stagnant truths gone to lie outside in a walking contradictory statement an oxymoron of confident anxieties murmuring into beautiful ugliness as the serpent in the shape […]
my soul is a tulip bulb buried upside down in the brackish muck of unsolicited tears she baked me a cake with a file in the center, i thought to whittle away the bars, but when i looked closer it said divorce along the rusted belly, my false sense of procured freedom was in her […]
her voice carries down from upstairs she sings in some strange language as i shave i find myself head cocked feeling the emotion even if the words mean little it isn’t a great voice, more that of an absent minded village girl at the river singing happily as the world slowly moves past reflected in […]
i have beenfeelingtoo fucking ugly to writepretty proseso if the poetic outputseems lackingit isa direct reflectionon the foolhimself youare the only beautyin the seaof bitter malaise you have no ideahow gratefuli am you exist because i have beenfeelingawfullyfucking lostas of late
drapedin madnessthe worldscreamsin italicswhilethe foolsand poetsclip leavesoff ofthe littleblossomsto dryfor uselater
the cold like pins and needles along my shivering legs even under the blanket in hoodie curled in a lonesome ball of ambiguous dismay somewhat requiring some vapid facsimile of mother’s milk or winsome female camaraderie in which to stoke the fires of heartwood stirring the embers huddled on the couch buried deep down it […]
mute without poetry this isn’t art this is screaming in lowercase
sylvia called death a bald headed buzzard yet she gratefully stepped into the ebon winged embrace of the carrion collector i think death must be beautiful an angel casting negative shadows with every displaced breeze caused by multi-hued peacock feathered wings a ring of lavender tinted perfection floating just above hermaphroditus beauty transcends simple earthly […]
i am notkilling timejust gentlychoking itin a semieroticresponseto this achethat swingsin pendulous rejectionof life passing byout the dirty windowthat facesthe parking lotin a landof broken dreams
let me layin the fieldsof wildflowersi am tiredmy soul hurtsi just needto catch my breaththis stitchin my sidefrom choking downthe worldhas turnedinto a spiderwebof cracksalong my contentiousi don’t likewho i have to beto survivethis goddamned jokewhere shehas to be hurtbecause he isn’tenough none of usfeel likewe are enoughbut where does thatstop beinga feelingwhen do we […]
i learned to give up the things that didn’t matter to simply walk away but i wonder how much of myself was left on the side of the road as i cleaned house there are things i will never get back that leave small holes in my heart surely i shall bleed to death before […]
is anyone else feeling (irritiable uncomfortable rancorous) a little off or is it the sparrows that flit around my head whistling doo dah with no great concern for the people around me as if this irrational rationale b-movie grandiosity this insipid banter the planes float in the air above the airport and as i watch […]
she stood peering out the window of her little one room apartment into the window of my little one room apartment likely, i was scratching my ass or scowling angrily at the ceiling the glorious life of a poet wasted on fools that swim in words instead of smiling at ladies that peer out the […]
la luna ticks the boxes that make up the madness bleeding through absentee tear ducts the fountain remains dry as the sad little cherubs blow horns that will never ring clear through yellow light in the gray skies above
a thin veneer of glistening frost coats the world outside the filthy windows that do little more than filter out the finer details of another morning in purgatorial musings her fingers gently stroke my aorta as she sleeps sweetly, a stuttering halt to my limbic dissolution gray skies mute the typical symphonic disharmonies of the […]
the winds are strong today the chimes clang a cacophonous unmelody with every gust that pulses through the gestating storm between my ears i want to, yet do not heed, the call to furiously stomp out and tear them down because in the gentle breeze the sound soothes is so easily forgotten in the raging […]
my uglinessis bubbling upto the surfaceagainbarely restrainedby the poorlyformed skullthe fleshdistortedas the imageshownbecomes somethingmore akinto the onereflected backin the quiet momentsof dire depression seven yearsbad luckfor each mirrorshatteredin thisundisguisedself loathingequals a lifetimeencompassedby the truthswhisperedbetween lashesyet i still wantto give my loveto you aloneeven as i fearwho i really am my soulis broken drywallshowing a glimpseinto […]
feel as ifi wokethree timesto a progressive scaleof incrementalnone matterance pouring myselfinto multiplecontainmentswondering whythere is never enoughto go around emptied slowlydrainedof any and everypossibilityyet still tryingto give more lost somewhereon the bell curvebetweenunwantedandunnecessary
my mind islostin the black eyesof sharksas i lookfor youin the stormthat seems tobrewjust offto the sidedissipatingwheneveri looktoo hard i should bewritingbut how can itell a storywhen the only thingi canthink about ishowwrapping my armsaround youseems likethe closest to nirvanaas thiscollection of sinswill ever get
leave the deeper thoughts for the stoned poets listening to the rain hit the window washing the grime from world to leave it still somewhat filthy if not worse for wear as the cold bones of winter settles ladylike upon the earth let those bleary eyed fools suss out the true meaning of love or […]
it isn’t that i am tired it is my skeleton has been carved from dwarf stars my heart is a black hole my mind gone supernova so my shoulders are slumped in the most atlas of shrugs without need for overblown theatrics nor antiquated philosophy i feel overwrought by the stillness in being taking no […]
woke up sad nothing helping workout shop cook nothing just an absent ache an icicle tapping against the cardial sac wishing for empty instead of frozen bobbing for chlorinated apples in the open sewer of my mind i have a headache but my heart feels bruised like a plum from lack of you nestled tight […]
there is an infinite etching of sorrow in a perfectly prepared sunny side up egg sitting on a plate with golden brown hashbrowns and too many slices of bacon; this golden sea congealed futures decided long before the machinery took all hopes of pecking gravel from unformed wings there was a man who did topiary […]
i have conversations with ghosts hints of memories rather than bother real people with my rambling thoughts anxieties it bothers me to think i think of this as normal it bothers me more when they agree.
a window washer on the side of a skyscraper working for spare change as the occupant glare out at him as the squeegee squeaks he is a trapeze artist so convincing scared to death trembles at the edge smiling with false bravado as his knees shake in need of a puzzle solver as i fall […]
sad like a sickle left to rust in the dusty barn with a view of fields of waving wheat sad like finishing a wonderful book that went to all the places a tale travels to sad like the lonely that only comes when you realize there is something missing a blue crayon rolled under the […]
a lone raven murderless landed on the hood of the gray car in the empty parking lot staring with a cocked head at the fool staring with a cocked head back as they stare a connection passes between a bond of sorts as the two lonely creatures turn to watch the cardinals and the blue […]
in this cracked eggshell skull floats the solecisms that define the egregious faults precariously stacked to form the repugancy hidden behind tear duct atrophy in my ignoble stare she took a red pen to circle my breaches of social mannerisms highlighting my grammatical mistakes until she realized it would require a tanker of ink to […]
unsure if this waivering feeling is insubstantiality or insignificance but well aware it is the varnish keeping me as unimportant as inhumanely possible the gray skies do little but increase the permanence in the way my words fall muted upon deaf ears screaming into a vortex of sound yet never saying a thing the errant […]
this marionette has the demeanor of a dragon dragging his hoarde of empty enticements across the arid desert he is forced to reflect in an effort to deflect the desperate attention seeker seeking to capsize his inflatable cardiac distress pay attention to the way he casually dances in his seat oblivious to the obvious ploys […]
the crimson flows down the ivory steps of the ossuary cracked yellowed pieces of skull mar the serenity the hollow stares that fill every crevice pomegranate flames dance along the torches that do little to light the ebony maw that opens deep into the earth itself buried far beneath the boney outgrowths lies the bitter […]
in the inner insipidness inherent in indiscriminate self loathing lies the last increment of insidious insubstantiality watching make up tutorials to try and forgive myself applying a foundation to hide the hurt deep in my empty eyes if you could see me like i see me you’d never look me in the eyes again as […]
every poem written is a piece of crumbling mortality spat into the wind to fall unread across the page the quill taps the soul as it scratches along the vellum depleting the whole in an effort to appeal to a world that stopped paying attention millennia ago
the witching hour tolls as the fools shuffles aimlessly down the street the stars seem to blink in and out with the music that fills his empty skull the typical broken sleep pulverized by the nothing inherent in transitional woe it’s cold, far colder than it should be, a pervasive chill that blossoms from the […]
we lay together the sheets tangled around our heaving chests her legs tangled through mine the moon playing peeping tom through the open blinds my hand gently running down her spine i could love you she said softly into my chest why i replied in confusion she pushed off of me the storm building in […]
from the darkest crevices(lost light lingers in phantom waves) emits limitless glowering dread alas the sunken dream of drowned hope screaming whereupon the feathery remnant of restless sighs(whereupon the dusty memory of passion died) a lone traveler limps along the uneven truths spilled forth a burned out bulb sways upon the fetid air(drumming laquered nails […]
just above freezing as i stand waiting for light to change there is no traffic but the conditional training keeps me rooted to a the cracked concrete shivering as the wind gusts mockingly the lady at the waffle house knows my name as do the two regulars as i saddle up to the counter for […]
his heart was a bouquet laid at the jagged edge of an unmarked grave her love clawed desperately at the silk lined box six feet beneath happiness hope is the moon reflected off the curving blade pitted by bitter sorrow joy the deepest wound carved with insolent skill raggedly spilling forth his soul the primordial […]
granular reasoning leads to an avalanche of misunderstanding as the tectonic facts shift the reverie of absent realizations the last bloom on a dying vine is a revelation in the bitter cold winds of encroaching winter derailment angular denials follow the bell curve towards lost oblivion as surely as the sneaking suspicions render emotive disinterest […]
the fool had thought after eight hours trying to get to where he didn’t want to be to do what he doesn’t want to do at a hotel that didn’t want him there once his head hit the pillow it would be curtains to a(besides her)terrible day so he gave up the ghost of hope […]
the stars are the same even if i am farther from your embrace there is something intrinsically wrong with that the sky should feel the same lovelorn sorrow every twinkling light should burn itself out in remorse
i don’t want to complain if i can help it all it does is lead to more complaining dwelling on things that cannot be changed so i fake a smile laying in bed staring at the ceiling going over the mental checklist underwear socks pants t-shirts work shirt comfy shoes mask toiletries chargers kindle glasses […]
at times i feel completely lost pushed and pulled with no say in the direction packing a bag for a flight i don’t want to take to learn more for a vocation that barely let’s me breathe taking time from the things i should be doing frustrated anxious and fearful aware that this constant streaking […]
and i watched as the horizon filled with smoke insignificant the sky rains razors the immensity of tangential comeuppance they put flouride in the water to pacify the barracudas in the tanks and i watched as the horizon filled with smoke transitive secular polarity as the ever shifting rancorous majesty abounds in magnetic bipolarity bandied […]
some days when the light refracts off the wayward eye of utter devotion splitting nto isotopically intrinsic morning showers comprised of shuddering sorrowdaggers with ebon blades hungering for the heartblood dripping from the open blossoms of pale purple thistleweed choking constricting the diaphragm until all that is left is a hazy reflection in the mud […]
the stars were dead long before we believed they twinkled for us alone making wishes on celestial death so focused inward that the gods we made to justify our own failings had to be shadows cast on the backwall of this dilapidated ouija board factory we call home sweet hell
incidental incremental falling into self destruction every three miles a dead skunk in the middle of the road a glitch in the system replaying images designed to strike the paranoia the anxiety screaming to stop from falling inside curling up involuntarily the storm on the horizon feels like a bad one the lighthouse isn’t visible […]
microscopically myopic with a tinge of body dysmorphia wrecking hell reckless feeling way too energized feeding on the manic anxiety like a superconductor a lightning rod getting struck on repeat the lichtenstein patterns dance on my bare torso as i self flaggelate on the stained carpet of a back alley motel on the bad side […]
i want to be somewhere that the city doesn’t drown out the stars where the world is not frenetic somewhere quiet but i love the city maybe it is the people i can do without except i love watching people i want to live somewhere close enough to a people zoo but far enough away […]
feeling over-emotional skinless in a salt water bath the mad line between cryinglaughingandscreaming my head hurts my heart hurts and the world is far too scratchy
once the potential turns kinetic once i engage it is never ending clack clack clack clack clack clack the silver balls smack sending mercurial shimmers at an atomic level to shift this electron dystopia of negative charges down the spinal recompense of a life lived huddled in the shadows afraid to be seen as the […]
the clocks have fallen backwards little drunkards on the mantle yet the internal dismay sounds regularly no matter the locality the fool refuses to acknowledge time as anything other than a construct invisible chains of anxiety until a scientist figures out how to traverse it backwards then it remains meaningless i count the heartbeats since […]
the sky showers down droplets of its peculiar vernacular a rhythmic dribble lost in the nuance of her absent-minded stare when the only urge is to wrap myself tightly around her take the worries away in the warm glow that pulses in her presence it’s cold again today i sit watching the rain shivering beneath […]
i woke today insubstantial a shadow of the person i had hoped to be a wispy almost human shape filled with insecurities anxieties a once hopeful bastion of dream no more than a fraction of a hint potential squandered in an emotional pile up along the rainy corridors between real and imagination i woke today […]
the moon weeps the air filled with sullen tears as the skies above reflect the seas below i dreamt of you last night in fits and starts i found you sitting in the shade of the kapok tree while the concial thorns sway beneath the falling rains you smiled as i chopped my way through […]
he lit another cigarette off the corpse of the last letting out a cloud of blue smoke that danced in the cool rainy air followed by a tremendous cough that rattled like thunder and looked me in the eye as he spat onto the wet concrete and said: each one of these is a fuck […]
the world rings hollow the rains continue to fall in the blank spaces between errant spatters unblinking eyes trace movement coiled ready to strike i lay here under the elements weathering the storm staring into the ceaseless night that rests just behind your unabandoned vacancies in you i become less substantial unvisible in your tumultuous […]
they take their rusty blades to hack hack hack away at me seeking the secret to my hollow rings whenever my mind is otherwise elsewhere surgical precision of a million palm fronds dancing in hurricane force winds carving intuition from virgin flesh leaving vast fleshy partitions to strut my nightshigers like a skinned cat in […]
i have become treadbare threadbare spinning in place yet never moving never finding traction in traction a reactioniary revisionist no time for thought no plan no future no time for foresight forgot to look ahead hooking a gift horse in the hellmouth beating a dead hoarse throated cry of the harebrained hairtrigger sniper the asinine […]
his head is heavy the headache has returned welcome home it screams in pulses of wavering intensities of electrified honeysuckle infused agonies he is in his bed yet he cannot turn off the feeling he is still gone too little sleep too many thoughts so he drowns it all in coffee ryo happy thoughts of […]
exhausted yet wired back in the familiar cave not home no she is home together we are home but close enough compared to hotel life fifteen hour day five of which spent roaming the airport dancing down the escalator singing i’m scum loudly with nothing better to do need to decompress or simply press my […]
there is a reckoning coming i reckon a time for the beast to shed the skin of the fool to ravage savage ruthlessly crush the remnants of what once was a man but is now no more than a shell of who i longed to be too many times i was tossed to the side […]
there are pinholes in my darkness little rays of light lost lumens seeking an escape from the irrevocable emptiness that permeates my entirety cascading beams that exist only to be absorbed into my inequities bounced against the onyx stillborn heart caged in a tomb of bonefuckery every unanswered prayer wish or i love you a […]
the first time you came over we talked for hours on the couch then our lips got entangled and somehow our clothes all fell off we went back to the bedroom where you screamed out my name with every shuddering spasm with every time that you came when we woke in the morning i wanted […]
she sat weeping as the cold air blowing as she tugged her (exist ten)shawl(dread) tightly over her bony shoulders as bitter tears turn to dirty smears upon her lined cheeks a chance encounter on another sleepless walk i needed coffee she needed food so now we sit under the less than hospitable stares at the […]
it’s so quiet too fucking quiet i can’t think without the music on breathing in the recycled air in this empty hotel the edge of babylon. i keep going out for walks aware there is nothing to see here nothing to be here an interruption a disruption mistyped code deletes the function an empty junction […]
the line for the fast food restaurant stretches around the building snaking it’s way through the hotel parking lot he stands in the window freshly showered in the midst of crippling depression as he stares down at the cars he can’t sleep the bed is too soft the covers too heavy the pillows too much […]
there are monkeys flinging shit from the balcony in my mind rabid little bastards with insane fever burning madness in their eyes there are ducks swimming in ever tightening spiralling doom through my endocrine system pecking at my pituitary gland like a fat beetle on the waves there is a squirrel frantically clawing at the […]
the time change has my head all sorts of fucked as i found myself roaming the streets at two in the morning unable to silence the words in my skull yet incapable of spilling them into the aether the area is familiar enough during the day but as i walked i found myself feeling more […]
there are moments when the world feels too heavy but the weight starts somewhere inside my chest everything feels fractured i find myself floating in an upside down umbrella in flash flooded streets as cartoonish nightmare parodies dance along the roofs of the submerged cars kicking off alarms that bleat silently with flashing lights on […]
i am starving hollow an echo answers when i choke down the sparse spittle from biting my lip the entire day i am miniscule an ant among giants that seek to step on my every furitive movement through the big city hatred every building is covered in mirrored glass yet when i look i see […]
damn near rubbed a hole through the magic lamp wasted every wish on idiosyncrasies disguised in ill advised soulrattling cries draped in lies there is a hole in my sole as the streets run red with blood the steady squelch step leaving crimson splatters on this one way manual escalator leading directly to the latency […]
laconic meanderings in the heat of early autumnal reverie(flint spark tinder)heavy is the head that wears the fez tassel streaming(oft forgotten glimpses)lost hours filled with unwept tears diuretic fancies flit(permeating the tenebrae)serendipitous; the bastard sleeps: the bastard slept. rainswept/windswept/unkept/unkempt everything tossed together in the umbra of lackadaisical(semi- plausible)denialbilities a translucent redundancy hums at the edge […]
Mike's Manic Word Depot 