lesser than

i woke today
insubstantial
a shadow
of the person
i had hoped
to be
a wispy
almost human shape
filled with
insecurities
anxieties
a once hopeful
bastion of dream
no more
than a fraction
of a hint
potential squandered
in an emotional
pile up
along the rainy
corridors
between
real and imagination

i woke today
under the bed
behind the bookshelf
cupped around
your blissful heart
a web
of wonderful
decrepit loss
a lump
in your throat
a whispered
sigh of acceptance
in defeat
a shade
a ghost
a spectral shape
that shimmers
just outside
the corner
of your beautiful eye

i am less than
you imagine
yet more than
i appear
in this quandary
this paradox
this conceptual
masterpiece
of infernal
ingenuity
i am the bulk sum
of pre-cum
declarations
coated in acidic lies
the blood
on the tiles
of an otherwise
spotless facade
the words
that stick
like a popcorn shell
between
tooth and gum

i am yours and i am sorry

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