no calls today fully dressed and waiting to go somewhere when nowhere is the only destination i have mapped on my phone the silence does little for a mind at the brink of breaking down so i go for a drive to preoccupy my need to pick at the scabs itching as the flesh heals […]

when i was a kid we carefully sat upon the poverty line you don’t know necessarily that you are poor as a precocious child i had assumed everyone lived like we did it wasn’t as if we went without often we just lived within our means as best as we could manage one summer we […]

it is hard to concentrate with my heart pounding in my ears no music or reading two sick kids meant a lot of movie time and the idea of more makes my insides squirm in irritation hanging at the cusp of writing where it is building up into a full bodied breathless need yet i […]

the river flows sluggishly through the antechamber of incidental yearning a sick slick of poisoned apathies thick foamy dismay in a thousand ebon bubbles churning out effervescent odes to this pollution of pustulance pervading a quiet morning of hollow denials as the planes circle searching for wreckage in the smoking craters where the bonesplintered audaciously […]

the first morning where the chill coalesced across my flesh swaddled in birdsong goosepimpled shivers in a naked ball grasping at the wispy dreamdust scattered in the darkened room for one more minute of her in my arms before facing the day a manic ball of crystal coherence my adorations hang in clouds of mist […]

it’s just so goddamned dreary even the automatic lights on the cars seemed confused it is a solid slate a funeral pall on an otherwise miserable friday of traffic and an inabilty to express this rampant manic catastrophe percolating foamy hopes over this torrential slurry of expected sorrows cold sheets of rain listlessly swaying as […]

procrastinating sitting in the rain staring at the side of the murky gray building i do not want to enter the stereo gods aren’t helping much i keep telling myself you can’t stop ace of spades and then how do i not finish stepping stone hüsker dön’t skip sunshine superman the problem inside can wait […]

i tried my damnedestto play well whilechained to thegates of hadesbut three egosslowly swellingshed the illusionof i in teamand my claustrophobicsoul yearned to beheard at long lastso with stolen wingsof wax and feathersi am my own icarusand i will freezeto death tryingto touch the sunbefore i plummetas a stepping stonefor another’s success letting go is […]

substitute by the sex pistols erased a poem from my lips as i drove this morning the bits that hover spiderwebs in the wind poetic shards of unquenched beauty but the words evaporated dew in the morning light just the supple refractions murmuring in my empty skull as i snarled you think we look pretty […]

the last sleeping pill a lingering fog the coffee can’t quite seem to dispell as i listen to the sparrows the first flashes of dull light bleeds through and i am unsure if it is the sun rising slowly or another round of random terror from the faulty ground in my tesla coiled brain as […]

transformers send showers of sparks raining down on my head i am supercharged racing with arcing light the mania strikes as many fucking times as it wants as i thrash snapping molars on the wooden dowel jammed in my alligator bite splinters pierce my gums a pink flecked foam lost in my sandalwood scented facial […]

it wasn’t the end of the world though it was an ending which can be difficult to differentiate as the ground trembles and he tumbles downdowndown into a hell of his own creation an execution of soulspasming rejections in earnest anguish he wasn’t good at endings a stack of books with dogeared pages marking final […]

a constant frenetic motion never stopping no time for thought just movement one parking meter goes to zero as the next one gets fed racing from the thirteenth floor to the street eight blocks over rinse and repeat elevator to sidewalk to escalator to skybridge to staricase to parking meter cars circling hoping to steal […]

every once in a while i get to watch as a car goes the wrong way down the one way maze of downtown dallas they pull out of the parking garage and play on their phones and then perform what usually turns into a panicked state of consecutive wrong turns as the horns blare a […]

the wind through the trees sounds the same as the waves crashing to shore and for a moment as the coffee drips the lack of sleep along with the wind blowing has me uncertain as i sit in the dark what lays outside the crooked blinds i could stumble half awake into the black waters […]

some nights my sorrow summons the storms to drown this world of insipid miseries my chest aches as the lightning darts across the periwinkle clouds and i cannot tell if it is real or a manifestation of inclemental agony the rains pummel a dessicant of deceitful soulsquander as i trace the drops in erractic descent […]

a flat bed truck towing a car with another on the bed spraying water over the side of the overpass as it undulates a catterpillar of metal and glass lazily crawling from thirty around to commerce street and i am an aphid in the torrential rains scurrying to find some leaves to fill this void […]

i am a nautilus a spiraling demise in half dreamt reverie as the sleeping pills give a pseudo slumber of decreasing dreamwhispers causing me to pull tighter and tighter until the anxiety of waking tired and aching on top of this comprehensive lack of dream leaves me rather unresponsive to morning stimuli a three quarter […]

life is nonconsensual at its very core so we apply a false set of standards to define living refusing to acknowledge how the basic tenets transcribed are are ideals with no expectancy of actuality clinging to dreamshards to make the menial deficiencies less abrasive unless we find some measure of fulfillment where we currently exist […]

every atom vibrates at its own frequency the unfathomable gaps between frantic keening in irradiated dismay tumors shivering a cancerous sonata solitary requiems languishing lost in a lethargy of phantom limbs grasping desperate for a connection a purpose in the infinity straddling electron displacement self absorbed satellites spinning terminal trajectories dutifully bound to gravitational flux […]

the last yearlasted a decadei hit record lowswhich is honestlysaying somethingit was a slowdissolution offriendships whereexterior forcesrevealed hiddenidentities i hadnever suspectedand the poor foolwith his abandonmentissues forcefeda fallacy offalse facades wheretrusted confidantshad once occupiedled to bleedinga pool of insecuritiesdeep enough todrown in sorrows a year that lastedat least a decadeand as the world diespreparing for […]

my beard once more ginger than the tousled brown that once adorned my salacious skull has lost the embers that once colored my chin in coppery curls as the wintery growth has more snowy patches fitting camouflage for hiding in the oncoming cold the mirror shows an older face my mind cannot quite correlate with […]

a clatter of slamming doors keys jangle as babies cry a soft shushing as the coffee maker hisses engines firing squeaking bearing loose belt screams three beeps from the kitchen as the first cup fills the mug steam rising the blinds turn shades of indigo climb above the rooftops as sirens cry warning while the […]

they are sending texas school kids home with dna kits and placards for their fingerprints not as an experiment into researching genealogy but to help police identify bodies in case of another school shooting not for the purpose of teaching anything except that the government will do nothing to curtail the mass shootings except to […]

we would walk along the lime covered trail kicking rocks explaining in that cocksure teenage certainty we knew exactly everything necessary to bend the world around our whims the four of us a cohesive unit inseparable against a world that we knew wasn’t ready for us stealing cigarettes getting stoned beneath the rusted train tressle […]

the bushes verdant, shallow wall sparrows dart the sun breaks in lazer beams through bare spots blinding refractions in white graveldust collecting colloquial condemnation in a curious culling of canine devotion the branches tear as i push my way into the hidden panorama of precarious paradise torn scraps flags of surrender as the topiary gives […]

morning spent in mourning for sparse sleep, filled with the indentions left by visiting spectres, the coffee pot sits cold and drained, i writhe the coarse cocoon swaddled too tightly, the putrefied organ slurry of reconfigured mass, as the rigorous transformation sends ripples cascading the words scream yet i choose to ignore them poetic nonsense […]

the mainspring has lost tension the small crown a brass cap with worn knurled edges spinning freely the mechanism that once wound this heart a severed connection the seconds slip as sluggish gears tick a last tock in the stagnation of sleepless nights the cataract of milky white indifference swirls behind the jeweler’s loupe held […]

a rare cool morning the sins of the sun break lazily through the steel gray skies above sleepy cleburne the only lost souls line up for a hint of caffeinated warmth as a fool roams about a head full of poetry leaking out in threads to entangle errant rays in crystalline sepulchres with irradiated blossoms […]

lifeless dull a series of mannequins with flesh bone splinters jutting out anthropomorphic cacti with fibrous sinew chlorophyll fingers maniacally winding pocket watches against the sullen tide of church bells ticktockticktock whispering pardons in parabolical disenchantment prickly passive pale pink purveyors in frantic repose ticktockticktock scabrous lips pulled tight scarred slits over toothy indentions dull […]

each of us is a biodegradable mass of accumulated dreams wasting away in the cookie cutter monotony broadcast a pollution of manufactured distraction distorting desires into disambigious dementias i think of poor pessoa trapped in his small room an ink well as a substitute for satiation as he longs for new visions to be plastered […]

i lay calm an ebony pool with a warped reflection of the moon shimmering in my shallow depth a contortionist i am pulled mercurial in nature transitioning effortlessly between states of semiconsciousness an evaporation in sublimated refrain an internal alarm in klaxon reverberation my soul condensed into a fine mist forced into a cramped darkness […]

last night in lieu of sleep i carefully sketched a faraday cage design for cradling my errantly sparking gelatinous mind a series of metal grommets in hasty incisions braided copper dreadlocks strung connected to the frame of the bed draining this excessive voltage through coiled springs discharging in a lavender hell to power this ragged […]

moths circle fluttering around my tremulous skull ashen smears streak my left temple as the unchecked voltage has turned me into a walking bug zapper the current spikes arcing over the faint stubble in a paralysis of anxietal demands i spent the night trying to harness this rampant energy in spasming flares lighting the bedroom […]

i drove three hundred miles yesterday and a part of me knew i needed to gas up but the same hurry to go nowhere that afflicted me causing me to forget my wallet had me lost looking out the window instead of at the gas gauge i was idiotically quite surprised when the car began […]

today is the third day out of four this week that i have forgotten my wallet at home and i am unsure what is so important in my brain that overrides my common sense and has me hustle out without a basic double check i could blame the brain lightning leaving me half catatonic and […]

lightning coursing across the left side of my skull singing the air with ozone laden agonizing forks leaving me unwilling to shift for fear of reigniting this tempest of tumultuous terror i sit alone nude except for my hat pulled low the constant pressure overloading the sensitive region creating an abyss of stabbing pains before […]

it was approximately the dead center of nowhere when i realized if i didn’t piss soon there would be a mess as each little town blurred past with nary a gas station in sight i finally turned down an old gravel road and parked beneath an old oak where i let loose a shower the […]

death comes each evening to chat billowing robes ashen skull hidden in the shadowed cowl she got my letters and on the nights i don’t feel up to conversing she reads them to me always starting with the ones written in waxy crayon the innocent ones begging for an ending to the special lessons designed […]

the advertisement begins so joyously with bright happy faces before shifting tonally to darkness interlaced with sorrow a soft voice whispers of the weight of bipolar depresssion and i watch wondering is this the cure to a lifetime of struggle can my mind mend itself with this magical pill that’s me the kind voice is […]

simplicity is paradoxical because of the inherent complexities ingrained deeply complicating what should be so easy with the anxieties of certain uncertainty the world is a watercolor painted by billions of hands in a spellbinding menagerie of images just out of focus except by the ones that left the smear avoiding interpretations untinted by the […]

she sauntered into the room i say saunter unsure of the meaning but knowing deep down she encompassed it with every inch of her being she smiled at me a cold almost lifeless lifting of her cheeks never quite reaching her disinterested stare or disturbing her wintry beauty as she sat two stools down from […]

we had a thickweathered green tarpunder which wekept our bicyclesduring the inclementrainy springs andlong frozen wintersit was waterproofso the dips andvalleys of fabricfilled with poolsand i would race mylittle metal carsdown the trackssuspended by thehandlebars and framesof the forgotten bikesrecreating death defyingstunts as the plasticwheels spun with agentle whining on thespindly metal axlesno thought given […]

they used to send me emails telling me there is something in the vulnerability that drew them to my sloppy odes to her peeling off my flesh to expose the ugliness we all hide beneath the skin deep beauty then they would confess in the pain and confusion to lighting a flame inside and after […]

i haven’t given up i have simply given away the best parts of myself to the universe cut off mementos to hang from the trees and the faint rattle is all that remains of a fool in a scorched silhouette where fevers flared frightful frozen flames ashes drift to settle in an inken solution with […]

humanity has huddled around various light sources to whisper tales of the monsters lurking in the darkness since the first rudimentary paintings scrawled upon the caves they hid in the more they evolved the more clever the ways they distilled the horrors that encompass humanity itself into a mythology of gods to explain away how […]

i have become a student of the false banter brokered by internet jockeys spinning outrages taking truth and perverting it for an enabled audience to rage over momentarily despite any factual evidence to support it it is fascinating televsion shows are pandering and the cartoon characters cannot be homosexual vaccines are trackers and the media […]

i can’t tellif the lightsare flickeringor if realityis shatteringbetween thesethunderous yawnsmy hand quiversand hot coffeespills over therim of the mugi see the fleshturn red butfeel nothing throughthe pins and needlesas the sun shinesa diluted hazeof sallow indignationinto the cloud ofstale smoke andlingering malaisean illusion ofsleepless shadowsas the bags beneathmy hollow eyesblunt the daggersof flickering lightand […]

outside my door strung from the light to the bottom of the second landing is a massive spiderweb the first morning i met my new neighbor i stood quite still in mid motion of locking the door as henrietta a frightfully large spider sat staring at me attentively perhaps a bit too attentively as if […]

i lose a littlemore of myselfevery mile drivenin the half dreamtstate of longing forthe things thatappear closer thanthey truly arestaring into theside mirrors for aglimpse at the reflectionof the promised happinessi can’t quite tellif i am chasingor racing just out ofreach of with no cluehow to slow down andlet it catch up to meonly to […]

a fairy tale upbringing grounded in harsh reality no magical spells cast to save the plucky hero just a lifetime of issues used to make sure the ending is the only happiness to be found. no wishes granted as each one of the fears compacted is exploited by the careless whims of indifference casually given […]

i am dying this slow death of a thousand papercuts interminable this torture spending each day making thousands for the fat cats who pay pennies to the poor schlubs losing the best part of themselves chasing white picket fences the bank will own long after the flesh has fallen from ivory bone i am dying […]

a half empty bottle of whiskey music on too loud sending ripples through the amber sharp white cheddar on cheap saltines and the bottomless depths of anxiety flipping back and forth between manic depressions and angry acceptances in a synaptic storm flash frying the quivering gelatin containing this abomination of ancillary existence shot glasses shatter […]

it wasn’t the words that choked me it was my pride at being relegated to the shadows i had to learn to swallow and i realized it wasn’t pieces of me i was losing it was the pieces tossed in the trash no one had a use for swirling in an abyss as i gave […]

brass statues frozen smiles locked in the tedium of false motion never managing to accomplish a thing except collecting birdshit and acting as props for tourists tarnished handprints in sickly green obscuring the sorrow of being held at arms length from the joyous crowds i find that i can relate more to these brassworked automatons […]

i dont know if it is this digital age affecting things but i tire of this sterilty vases filled with plastic fucking flowers no scent nor hint of the terminal velocity in beauty wilting just half measures placeholders artificial artistry pantomiming the hits with no concept of the blisters bursting on the tired hand clenching […]

easily infuriated technology has turned into a trial of ever waning patience phone keeps rebooting cutting me off as cars cut me off not understanding the angry automaton piloting this hybrid death machine waiting for the satellite in geosynchronous orbit to lavish my hollow skull with directions to the next appointment with half conscious paramecium […]

a feeling ofhaving been beatenor each musclejolted by voltageseizing crampsfrom the adrenalinein panicked attackswhere fight or flightare mere dreamsbecause the enemyis yourself andno matter how hardi attempt toflee my brain itis the only realityin chemically saturatedinsanity i can trustto stab me in thechest while smilingtoday feels like isurvived a car crashfrom the rampant abuseanxiety puts […]

lost in the turgidity of turbid thought the seething emptiness of insular ideas unacted upon by this fear stained stasis of inchoate necessities less a soul objectified in defiance writhing down avenues of deeply entrenched dead end needs a creature in human disguise intermingling a prostitution of desperations with a solemnity in eager silence

even with satellites helping navigate i got turned around by an accident and was suddenly lost somewhere outside burleson choking down frustration and the edges of a panic attack the seatbelt too tight across my chest and i cannot catch my fucking breath going in circles on backroads i need to stop but i cannot […]

he dashes to and fro between the plates teetering on small wooden rods carefully spinning each one at just the right speed to keep them all perfectly balanced he is exhausted but the audience just watches at the edge of their seats waiting for the inevitable collapse signaling a chain reaction of shattered plates but […]

spewing out poetic fumes as tectonic plates shift in silent fury i feel myself about to erupt so i bite down on my tongue hoping the blood sacrifice appeases the sullen soul as i lay waste to a bedrock of porous pumice from the last catastrophic burst

the sheet of paper had had enough grown lethargic from the litany of listless dreams a crisis of self did the words hastily scratch onto its papyrus flesh define who it was meant to become another meaningless ode scrawled by a fool too deluded to accept fate had other hells in store for him only […]

a new business park the same drab grays another empty parking lot painstakingly peeling layers off this onion blaming the sulfuric stench for the tears a perfect plaything each new level exposed a confoundation of repetitions revealing the hidden cyclicality of abhorrency calling from the nothingness in a computer coded series of meaningless zeroes the […]

brittle little poet feeling so all alone in his rundown apartment pacing endlessly through the long nights spent picking apart the broken bits until his hands are covered in tiny little cuts from the technicolor dreamshards puncturing the tenderest of desire suffocating on the depressive tentacles wrapped around his papermache ribcage as the canary slumps […]

oh, how i feelthe black waterschruning beneaththe bow of myrickety vesselas the waves swellbattering the hulland i dream ofsinking underneaththe spume of eveningbeckoning in thefrigid ebony riverfor there is naughtleft for a forsakenfool chasing doombleeding calamitiesin oil slick poolsrefracting moonbeamsinto a slick sickof corrupted desireto do but succumb tothat dead eyed moonfilling the vacancyin my […]

some people have learned all they need to devoting themselves to the small world they occupy and are contented in the knowledge that gets them through the routines they need to survive specialized geniuses unaffected by all the ideas they have no need for i know just enough to see the glaring holes and the […]

ny syncopated heartbeat shook the cover off and i woke cold in a tangle of half remembered dreamcoral as the sun broke between the slats to tint the darkness with a sickly penumbra extinguishing the lingering tendrils of sleep in an exhaustion of desperations as i clawed at the hazy haunting of my hollow cathedral […]

as the darkness lays cool upon my flesh the quiet of the bedroom settles politely as the ceiling listens patiently as i pontificate on not feeling the words choking me as i realize there is nothing left for me to say that hasn’t been ignored at least a dozen times unacknowledged in a casual glance […]

i can’t help myself from tracing the edges of my lacerated soul plucking at the tattered wisps as they dance in the constant swirl of the ceiling fan reminiscing over the fingers that once plucked the strings across my blistered tender remnants in a soothing song of succor tinged with painfully sharp reminders of how […]