electric blue

i woke up with a mushroom growing out of chest i noticed because of the bioluminescent glow beneath the blanket it took me by surprise the ethereal blue glow like electricity flickering in a pattern i recognized as the pulse in my ears now my body effuses that tell-tale throb of electrical glow as the […]

agony in absentia

when this malaise this bonerot this thorn of ivory driven through the pupil of hope this whipping winds of salt upon bare nerves when the chemicals malfunction a blight covers the landscape within the sepulchre inside the still chest of the parakeet caged in those brief moments of busy when the shackles slip for a […]

rhymes with orange

shadow dappled ball of citrus respite a perfect culmination of sweetness and light swaying in the soft breeze like a door hinge it requires a certain slant to rhyme with or-ange the spores in a fern are made by the sporange and it also quite possibly rhymes with orange

it has to be enough

the thought of you ocean breeze tousled hair soulful eyes locked on the horizon if i could sketch you with the skill of monet the art would suffer in comparison it is impossible to capture your heart which shimmers in the most beautiful way best to love you from afar where my sharp tongue can […]

tongue of memory

as time shifts gears to rocket propel the future into present present into past past into murky remembrance certain shades fade to dull sepia emotions erode until it is impossible to recall the love she showered in the face of how easily it was for her to leave it all behind like consuming raw pineapple […]

headstones

each headstone another marker covered in misrepresentation summing up a life of dreams desires hopes and failures into a placard reducing the spirit interred into rigid numbers polite reminders homogenizing an existence into cold information while erasing all trace of the individual weather battered trail markers worn down to smooth stone with decaying blossoms eventually […]

withdrawn

the needle breaks the skin the plunger pulled back to allow a spiral of red to dissipate into the solution before being injected back into the vein to rush through vascular chaos how many hits of you still flush my system in the quiet time before the sun fully rises when the world still sleeps […]

scraps of yarn

as sleep fades the world begins to impose itself only the faintest hint of your lips remain pressed firmly against mine the last wisp of subconsciously kissing you throughout the night i squeeze my eyes tightly shut in hopes of falling back into dream into you where the promise of my heart’s content can be […]

waterlogged

the dishwasher glugs along to fill the room with the secret sound of the ocean just beneath the surface as it swirls among the coral dragging the waterlogged corpse of creativity nibbled by eels little fish in every hue darting to tear at the gray skin; as i sulk in self-manufactured well manicured misery.

whispered truths

he crept along exuding a pestilent stench pus oozing from his open wounds of self-inflicted pennance wretched is he who truly sees himself for that man shall never know a moment of peace in the flurry of whispered truths.

sips and soft kisses

i let the coffee saturate my tongue but long for it to be you i choose the bitter to replace your sweet knowing nothing else will do the rains have stopped but the overcast sky gives a false sense of autumn the coffee steams gently as the hum of the air conditioner fills the silence […]

poets and philosophers

i have a fondness for philosophy but a general disdain for philosophers the ideals no matter how batshit insane appeal to the need for structure in my mind but come around spouting the words of a dead coke addled mother obsessed trying too hard austrian? batten down the hatches as the pretentious pilot begins to […]

rainy dream

the thunder awoke me from vaguely insidious dreams of things lurking just off in the black haze that i found myself lost within i was calling out to you my hoarse voice catching only to be absorbed half-formed spat back mockingly by the things that watch with unblinking ebony orbs when i woke the rain […]

a beautiful corpse (of gruesome delights)

i have taken to a new obsession lately watching fruits breads vegetables rot in time lapsed videos the natural beauty ravaged by time in no time then the reclamation by the mold the final act takes my breath away i have made no attempts to hide my love of ugly the beauty in the filth […]

one at a time

comparing two flowers instead of seeing the intrinsic beauty in each does a disservice to both the onlooker and the flowers i tend to only be obsessed with one flower at a time as far as i am concerned no other flower exists in the slightest

straight razor

i am going to use the straight razor today in the pit of despair i didn’t trust myself to hold the keen blade against my scarred skin for fear of going too deep but the electric never really removes the entirety that dwells just at the surface naked to the human eye but still scratches […]

to my eventual exes

you are confused, possibly bewildered hurt, i am sure if you are reading this then you have pulled the trigger ended whatever charade of a relationship we had found ourselves languishing in i am sure i am devastated but good for you i likely will be in the midst of spitting tear soaked ballads into […]

saturday morning buffoon

the sun rose the engine roared the cat yowled i woke the bird sang the neighbor showered the silence settled i lay the plane circled the squirrel scampered the wind blew i listened the couple fought the police came the lights flashed i wrote across the page it appeared the world was the same even […]

art as a means to self destruction

hollow bones, hollow bones the waves consume the shore hollow bones hollow bones the dead dream no more scattered soul shattered soul pieces of crystalized hope scattered soul shattered soul swaying from a lovespun rope there are only so many ways you can rationalize away the anguish that pounds at your brain like an angry […]

fae

entwine the stems of roses three a sprig of thyme to tether thee around the hill the clock winds back a golden light beckons once pitch black a boon is granted in the emerald light as voices whisper from shadowed night as your legs quiver like a newborn foal the fae they call for your […]

photo-negative facade

i don’t know if i lost part of myself or if the parts of myself i tried to give away eventually returned there are so many things i don’t understand that i stare into the abyss screaming for answers that are only swallowed by the darkness from within my photo-negative facade the human x-ray unable […]

power

it’s one hundred degrees and the power is out the stale air carries the tinge of brimstone satan’s breath carries over the land to hang heavily like the body of the first poet from an old oak tree

shedding

is there ever a time when a man can shed his skin awaken to be someone else a new pattern emerging from the flaked off scars a new epidermal epiphany or do we all fall back into the routines that lead us off the cliff on repeat until the final curtain draws to the applause […]

choke

i made myself choke to feel your lips upon mine because i couldn’t tell you how much kissing you would make every bit of my existence worth it. my lips were created for that moment when we fell into each other losing trace of one another as we became something more and found ourselves there

stagger

one sock a tab of bubblegum stuck from the hot sidewalk beneath staggered steps the sweat dripping magnifies the cruel glare of the infernal eye in the sky one bloody footprint leading from the scene of the crime the setting where once upon a time died a gurgling death choking on the tears of disenchantment

a march, a dream, a stag(nation)

fifty-seven years ago there was a march that led to a speech that led to a dream look how far we haven’t come since then the news reports interlaced with graphics of graphic brutality fifty-seven years ago which was one hundred years after the war which is no longer considered a dream but a nightmare. […]

what it started

through misery through joy the sun truly does rise again to that i say with all due respect and admiration fuck off sun inconsiderate ball of burning plasma with no respect for boundaries no matter how i blackout this room your tendrils reach you cast your judgemental unblinkingly gaze through the hole in the ozone […]

mossy regret

o’er the dreams i dreamt when sleep i slept the tenebrae of loss doth permeate for none call in the night the whooping crane pierced by fangs with venomous drip beseeched by the betterment of mossy regret to perch high upon yon beleaguered soul

wind chimes

she entered my heart like wind chimes carried on the evening breeze a masterfully subtle coup d’etat that soon my every cell was imprinted with her touch now there is a crater where a pristine chapel with an ornate bell tower once stood the sound of wind chimes still makes my soul ache with loss

tilted halo

calculating the infinity in her gaze using a protractor to measure the acute angle of the angel’s tilted halo as my broken wings sweep through the dust in hopes of finding the missing components to this suicide vest of unsent valentines with cartoon hearts etched in blood

lost art of silence

silence is a lost art from a golden age where value was put into the few words spoken over being the loudest one in the room i do both with an expertise that was ingrained from a young age but the magic comes in the quiet time a tree says nothing but when the wind […]

book mail

the post office was empty as i trundled my armful of yellow mailers filled with books the lady at the counter smiled announced to her co-workers that this the poet she was talking about i felt my face burning above my mask near enough to steam the condensation in my mustache i had been in […]

dead man typing

if i was dead before you only springing forth to life when you showered your fleeting affections upon me what type of revenant have i become in our love’s passing i would have a funeral but the urge to crawl into the freshly dug pit would be likely more than this simpleton can take even […]

frustration

there is a ball of frustration that keeps growing like a new solar system in my guts as each new piece falls off to rot upon the floor i am left seething with this inability to accomplish the most basic of things correctly work is a dead end the words scream for attention that i […]

mermaids and sharks

the bitter sting of her rejection, her silence, her anger the things she promised she wouldn’t do at the beginning but slipped into like comfortable shoes has gone i wasn’t enough, she made that clear, it was the words i now see as honey flavored falsehoods, the promises that stopped meaning anything when the road […]

seldom seen

i imagine it is difficult to tell an angel from a vulture when you are dying a slow death in the desert alone. it is hard enough to tell the helping hands from the lashing strikes when one has been consistent the other seldom seen.

a dream, a breast

i dreamt of a breast there was nothing sexual about the dream that came as i stirred from my broken slumber the great beast mistakenly rolling over but in the dream the dream in which i dreamt of a breast i was holding her she was pressed tightly against me skin on skin her hair […]

bull

i sat in the car in a parking garage as they took the bull statue off the flat bed a group of workers in orange safety vests watched as the forklift driver slowly set it on the ground the sky was dark above the wind beginning its howls the air conditioner was blowing higher than […]

tomato potato

i want to feel her draped across my chest her scent strong in my head as we lay just basking in each other instead i will stare at the ceiling see how long i can go without breaking down tomato potato

no land in sight

i find that the swirl cone of anxiety mixed with despondency has me feeling like every single thing i do is pointless or destined to fail you don’t know how important the anchor is until you find yourself floating listlessly on the waves with no land in sight

flowers

pale purple flowers growing in a field covered in blown about trash there is a lesson there but i can’t find it through the tears

after the beep

can you hear me? am i doing this right? be silence once for yes twice for no it’s just that i have been dealing with a ton of shit lately some of it wasn’t even my fault who the fuck am i kidding? it is all my fault the straw broke the camel or choked […]

rains

the rains are salt water and i walk around without skin in the downpour i don’t have enough middle fingers to express the agony of this world of lies that sound like joy

conquistador

when i was a boy filled with grand plans of great adventures before the understanding of how the lessons taught were tinted by the victors how the conquerors were not heroes i wanted to discover new lands with that childlike misunderstanding that already inhabited lands weren’t new just unknown nations across the serpent infested seas […]

still life

woke up to see the sun glaring down at a world frozen in place the birds hung in the sky in static formation like a swarm of gnats a plastic bag gently hovered my first thought a jellyfish in a tank i didn’t dress just stepped out into the scorching day filled with curiosity this […]

the curious case of the vanished smile

i can turn it on in a second choke down the sadness fake a smile tell a story to curl your toes or make you smile or rub your legs together like a cricket at the sudden dampness but when i finally turn away the smile vanishes like a magician in a plywood cabinet like […]

a dream of a cigarette

we are sitting there on a picnic table but we are sitting on top with our feet on the seats close enough that your perfume is tickling my nose while your heat tickles me need you have a cigarette i watch the cherry brighten as you take a long drag the moon reflects your glow […]

for her

i saw her reflection in the waves and filled my pockets with stones to find her i heard her voice in my mind and cracked my skull open to set her free i kissed her lips in that moment i chose her as my salvation i gave myself freely to her and she rejected me […]

the desert in her eyes

i let myself be swept along the currents of this invisible sea never afraid of drowning as the coral of loves gone ashen slice the softer pieces into a slurry that calls the sharks to feast. dragged face down through the desert in her eyes parched from lack of reciprocation longing for my lungs to […]

witchy woman

i find myself consumed by her silence those moments between falling into her thoughtfulness before her sultry voice begins spilling her secrets i find myself starving for both in equal measure bewitching is this witchy woman unafraid to open herself not understanding the allure which in itself is alluring curiouser and curiouser as her silence […]

prometheus

never so beautiful as the eagle that swoops down to consume my liver each dawn never so poignant as the chains that bind me to this stone made from unreturned affection a modern day prometheus, mute fool with too much emotion not enough sense to cease being if only the eagle would feast upon my […]

oscillating

i get glimpses of poetry little images that flicker across the inside of my eyelids but by the time i stop to write them down her face has replaced every fractal of thought while i know she doesn’t stop to think of me there is a brief moment that stinks of hope reeks of need […]

review for Cerberus Rising

The always amazing, Lisa Lee Tone reviewed Cerberus Rising and to say I am blown away would be an understatement. review of Cerberus Rising I was especially happy to see ‘Baptized in Lethe’ mentioned. Of the three of my stories, Lethe was the most honest to who I am as a writer. I worried it […]

ravenous

i will never ask for more than you are willing to give but i will take every bit of you available to me i am ravenous insatiable hopelessly addicted to you

midlothian

every trip to midlothian seems the same but degraded slightly the quarries announce your imminent arrival new buildings litter the highway but once you get to the heart of the little city that is when the cardiac disease seems to be slowly eating the town by inches the faces look lined as if the knowledge […]

shower’d

i thought to stand in the hot water of the shower listening to the song it played off the bathtub in a symphony of disharmonic malaise the smell of the soap reawoke those memories that i have tried to smash deep down into the lockbox at the foot of my brain i was at the […]

tent stakes

we were once two tent stakes driven individually yet united in purpose now the canvas flaps limply in the breeze ensnared in the branches of the old oak and i am alone buried to my neck with a frayed loop of rope to remind me of what was

chisel

no matter the length of time i have spent covered in sweat striking hammer to chisel to the undefined block in hopes of the coveted you springing forth fully nude to ease the hunger burning in my belly clumsy hands lead to an avalanche of dust that sticks to my damp skin sparks erupt with […]

solemn

it is with a solemn and profound sadness i have to admit i derive no pleasure from this existence not that it matters i will still continue the same rigormorale write the same drivel and press forward

believe

she had a pendant that read ‘believe’ dangling between her breasts i watched it dance as she laughed at whatever nonsensical blathering i tried to convey. i have never been a religious man but the way that word called to me between the heaving smooth brown skin brought a bit of the believer out in […]

sad eyes

she said my eyes were sad peaking over the mask like two whirlpools that pulled at her heartstrings she asked if i needed a hug i did but my aversion to people to the world to everything feeling like saltwater poured on my naked frame covered by a thousand papercuts of dismissed need i am […]

need

i feel dehydrated drained emptied of all but the need to frantically spill verse across the opiate colored skies. nothing left but to die ugly and leave a trail of tear soaked odes to promises that were only meant to be broken.

finger painting in ash

some days the melancholia is rusted iron chains threaded through every corridor of my mind’s cathedral the picturesque glass detailing the arabesque landscape an afterimage of hell overlaid across the idyllic images of smiling faces holding hands a bitter hint at hope in decline as the world crumbles around them i lay on my back […]

two options

at this point short of a time machine or full frontal lobotomy this is the new state of normal i have been soldering components but leaving out resistors because i have given up completely the room smells of disinfectant with an underlying scent of sadness the ice pick sits in isopropyl as i steel my […]

the moon hung pregnant

I the moon hangs pregnant like a pause in conversation in which the wrong thing is said at too loud a.volume he was the king of doing that it didn’t help he was usually the loudest any way i watched him the world taking on an eerie slowed down pitch we were outside telling lies […]

mutually exclusive

i think had she known the task the burden the tireless need that comes with loving one as broken as i she would have been deterred it isn’t as if i didn’t warn her my poetry alone should have been dissuasive enough yet she cracked down on the hollow tooth let the cyanide flood into […]

ballerina

she moved with sublime grace across the shattered glass that sliced effortlessly through her thin slippers as she spun through the desolation of beauty in decline. i longed to take her under my broken wings to nurse her back into a state of less broken to nurture the sheer magnificence she exudes like beads of […]

dew

he was a loathsome prince of inequity a relic of better times one with sunkissed promises that glimmered like diamonds of dew hanging fat upon the new buds of tomorrow’s strangled misery

acupuncture

can they acupuncture my brain derail this miserable train of thought detail this tale of loss reveil my mind in fog resale my broken heart can they pierce my brain to the core of who i am restructure the list of failings into modern art redraw the blinds to shutter the light that was only […]

linger

i linger in your fiberglass impression ignoring the itch as i nestle in the last bits of you that still stab my ventricles with loss i linger because if i stop dust myself off accept you’re gone i don’t know if i will ever pick the shards of myself back up i linger in the […]

cockroach legs as dreamcatchers

dreams don’t come true after they rot turn to glitterdust nothingness they are gathered by the twitching legs of dirty cockroaches that live in the walls behind the drywall there are millions of eggs waiting to hatch to roll in the remnants of the things you wanted most in all the world dreams are only […]

gray

i long to make love to you to be enveloped in you as we writhe moving as one abstract moment frozen in biochemical frenzy i want to see your soul flash as you explode in orgasmic waves i want to cup your breast nuzzle up and sleep all night long with your smell your taste […]

rambling (delete when sober)

i have found myself at the bottle of rum when i haven’t seen the bottle of anything but olive oil or water in many moons but this is the first day alone without work or the kids to distract me from that you shaped hole that seems the whole of my emptiness and the world […]

tulips

the goddamned lump the ball of grief the flood held back by the little boy’s finger stuck in the dike the tulips soon to be submerged all i can do is choke it back down into the pit of waivering need that makes up ninety-nine percent of my mass

suburban decay

the age of beauty in urban decay is failing as we watch the sullen collapse of suburban mimicry the well planned even rows of monopoly houses set in sigils to call forth the elder ones that slumber aeons deep beneath the empty malls tumbleweed laden parking lots of cracked asphalt in front of closed down […]

voiceless

those bastardly irongripped fingers that grasp my tongue rendering me incapable of speech rise up from the freshly interred soil in the latest in a long line of attempts at what the chemicals decree devoir le plus important chips away the marble edifice where hope once thrived and all i wish to do is scream […]

difference

maybe the key to figuring out the absurdity of existence is not to zig when it zags but to fall into the gradient of madness we are taught to avoid as innocent idiots to revel in the pitfalls like a fork in the cheek of fate as we creep along the spiderweb woven into the […]

spit

etched upon the faceless face of death are the last spit words of every poet doomed in shackles of disparate need left wanting even in their foulest endings

she is gone, the wind whispers

the edge of longing laps the soul, the crane cries out in the dark, eyes like broken pottery beckon alone among the whistling reeds, she exudes panoramic indecency, in shades of emerald malaise reaching up towards the sky, a drip of crimson stains the moon, as viridescent globules blossom she is gone, the wind whispers […]

a cloak of finest spun night

she wore a cloak of finest spun night the cosmos reflected on her breasts through the clinging infinite darkness how i longed to trace her erect nipples with rough fingertips use teeth pinch lick squeeze every bit of her milky way until my fingers found the wetness at the center of her universal desire explore […]

to Ms. Plath, with love and understanding

if beauty were perfectly transcribed from ideal into the soul of one person ms plath was this personification but to balance the wonder she could pull from the aether there must be a profound sadness to keep the scales afloat it is in the heart of this sorrow that ms plath did the unthinkable it […]

fruitful and futile

the worst part of deep depression is the images it compels every smile every moment every memory is so clear it cuts with razor edges fruitful and futile in the same jagged instant forcing the blood to mix with the ink as the quill carves through the page to slice directly into the fragmentary soul […]

a series of un

he sits fork scraping pushing his dinner around the plate unable to will the fork to lift unable to taste the meal songs play softly but they are a chorus of discordant buzzing a book lays untouched the words simply swim on the page he tell himself he has to keep moving or he will […]

a thousand sundays of silence

they comes in swarms with their beady eyes the need palpable dripping off them filling the room with stenchfog i see them for what they are though they wear the right clothes or buy the right perfume or put on make up whatever they read real people do but they are facsimiles cardboard masks that […]

wait bracket

in the darkest night their hieratic spirits envelope me in a cocoon of devilish intent through the halls i scream hunched over a quasimodo for modern times frankenstein’s monster let loose on a global stage a one man pandemic of lucid nightmares bedazzled with stardust fucktassels applied tightly waiting for my fifteen minutes of shameless […]

lugubrious

i have an innate love for words because as silly or obscure there is always one perfect word for a moment i try to collect them store them away use them incorrectly on purpose or through staggering ignorance i will never say when the right word hits at the right time it is like a […]

bonne chance

tu ne trouveras jamais celui qui t’aime moitié moins que moi mais tu es toujours m’a jeté bonne chance en quoi que ce soit tu choisis fuir a l’avenir

accidental suicide

turned down two one way streets the wrong way had a moving truck nearly crush me against the wall of the parking garage another almost hit me on the highway the sign on the front desk of my mind says out for terminal dissonance too tired to function unable to sleep the near victim of […]

(i am)

i am near insufferable mostly lost in the images that flow through my mind even when not writing i am writing along the silent screen in my mind it isn’t that i put the words first it is that it takes being shaken to snap from their call i hide i am quiet i am […]

pennies

love is like a penny it costs more to stamp than it ever will be returned on investment or maybe it is just mine that was turned green from disuse tossed aside for a shiny nickel left on the train tracks to be flattened

anew

in a fit of rage and hurt she chopped down every rose bush in the garden then cursed the view that remained instead of replanting she boarded up the home running away to find the next serene spot to begin the cycle anew.

swindled

he was a leprechaun who lost it all when the magic died out in the world leaving him with no end of the rainbow to find his lost pot of gold so he peddled snake oil cures claiming miracles were possible knowing damned well there was no easy solution to losing it all they found […]

buckets

when i am alone and i am so very alone right now i just let the words spill when i had her i was content to let them slide over her smile like a life preserver when i do not i toss them by the bucketful at the world in attempt to tread water some […]

(if)

if i could draw the images i see so clearly i would never write another line i wouldn’t have to open myself to the torrent of words wouldn’t have to be beaten mercilessly one moment gently held the next i would scratch the pencil against the page to convey the infinite sorrow inherent in every […]

comètes

nous étions deux comètes c’est venu dans les orbites de l’autre pendant trop peu de temps quand pour toujours aurait été seulement la moitié assez (we were two comets that came into each other’s orbits for too short a time when forever would have been only half enough)