let me lay
in the fields
of wildflowers
i am tired
my soul hurts
i just need
to catch my breath
this stitch
in my side
from choking down
the world
has turned
into a spiderweb
of cracks
along my contentious
i don’t like
who i have to be
to survive
this goddamned joke
where she
has to be hurt
because he isn’t
enough

none of us
feel like
we are enough
but where does that
stop being
a feeling
when do we all
accept
we cannot
see ourselves
the same
as everyone else

just leave me
here
in this field
that reminds me
of the love
that has to
remain
just below
my own misunderstood
film of filth
that floats
in my eyes
for anyone to see
i will wait
for you
here
as the hell
in my heart
reminds me exactly
what i am
in the grand scheme
of things

a monster