a plea for rain

it seemed to rain everyday for a month the entire time the dull gray skies seemed a reflection of my soul now the sun shines through the crystal blue and in this naked exposure i find myself longing for the rains i am as tumultuous as those thunderheads that hung morosely over the uncaring concrete […]

self (aware)

sometimes i feel self awareness so intimately like sandpaper across bare skin but with the small in scope veneer of the velveteen depression that seeps over everything an ashen maple syrup that leaves everything wanting so the irony of my profession being fixing things as a semi-autonomous flesh bag filled with the shattered stained glass […]

lines of fire

i feel the lick of the lashes as the inexplicable whips of rancid understanding leave lines of bloody reminders down the length of my ability to verbalize this nauseating truth the blissful ignorance of a life left painless long since discarded with childhood fantasies in the ditch of stagnant refusals it is a form of […]

monster

how much of the real me is too much me for the world at large to handle as the porcelain mask cracks to expose scarred skin pent up lies irreversible damage inflicted by weather by hope by dream by love by self monsters are real they hide behind our eyes whisper little acts of horror […]

why not

the typical question i get when someone finds out i write is why. what else is there? i respond with a quizzical look painted on my normally scowling face. some people see the face of god in the world around them some see inherent beauty some people see wonder. i don’t see any of that. […]

reflection/rejection

i find in my numbed movements i am far more likely to retract than react to deflect than accept i am a distraction with little emotional attraction just another faceless drone roaming the streets alone

lost in truth

he bounces into the room with that manic energy of someone fresh off of rehab and still high on the the idea that the path to finding oneself is attainable it’s the third time he has done this the third time he has found his truth the third time he cast aside the blinders on […]