the last public beheading in paris

the parisians took to the streets to celebrate the use of the old guillotine wine splashed across the cobblestones an augury to the blood to come they packed the bars awaiting the guest of honor to be paraded to the wood and iron implement of final resting of succinct endings a bucket placed unceremoniously in […]

charade

the rustle of fabric alerted me to the fact that i was not alone the figure blended into the shadows as if stitched together by the same diaphonous darkness a low chuckle wheezed from my liquid-filled lungs as the knowledge of whom my visitor was dawned across the haze of fever thanatos, i murmured he […]

lye

there is an absurdist beauty in a funeral during a pandemic. the grieving forced to maintain six feet of sorrow betwixt the maximum ten allowed to silently watch the box get lowered. even the clouds above seem disinclined to break the new norms. the world now has a tinge of a meth smile as everything […]

artfully

i don’t wish death upon anyone i visualize it with painstaking care then i pour it into words across the paper how the blood beads up in the initial slice the affect heightened blood pressure has the gentle arc of arterial spray no i would never wish death upon someone but I will revel in […]

fugue

between the wind chimes and the neighbor’s songbird i feel like i am in a tornado of disharmonic nausea an orchestra pit this side of hell with demons clamboring a serenade to the chorus of the damned wailing all being played in a coffin on the back of a horse drawn carriage down a cobblestone […]

mariposa

ella era una mariposa montando en la capa negra de la muerte sangre goteando como una lluvia de verano de sus colmillos ella era el eclipse proyectando sombras invertidas con cada aleta de sus alas en el aire quieto she was a butterfly riding in the black cape of death dripping blood like a summer […]

check please

death is a bus ride down the lost highway to the last diner in the bad part of town all you want is a slice of pie but the waitress just pours old coffee while the fry cook scratches himself with the spatula now you’re left with the option of paying the bill for a […]

in a glass

she frowned like a flag draped over a coffin when she smiled her teeth looked like tombstones she had three sons two of which were spread out across the sands the third was twitchy and inherited her mouth when she died her teeth floated in a glass on the bedside table

hungry

the rudderless boat swept along into the open mouth of the tentacled beast that swallows all lonely seafarers eventually ground to paste in the crushing throat of barbs and hooks made for only destruction never knowing anything but hunger

aquarium

if the world is an aquarium i hide in my castle every single time the treasure chest opens with fat bubbles the diver waves but i wonder fearfully what lurks behind the great brass dome of his through the water he bobs on the recirculated water a remnant of olden times ancient exploration part of […]

three views on dying

he is fresh like a newly dug grave yet weathered like the headstone beside it take two he is open like a freshly dug grave yet worn out like the body soon to fill it take three the vigor of youth has left his dessicated frame leaving only a bag of aches and bones behind […]

rusted

floating blindly into the flash fires of eternity grab the back of my head push it down beneath the docile water lethe no coins for the ferryman no value no deposit most certainly no return from this lazy river cerberus snarls three sets of eyes follow my every move the gates of hades are locked […]

one

she felt like a satin draped coffin as i slid into her the thought made me pause a mixed metaphor that struck a chord in my mind in this act of love making i felt myself dying in pieces as i gave all of myself to her i was inexplicably changed the man that began […]

lovelifeanddeath

the saboteur hands grip the ivory pistol grip like a lover caressing the bare back of his heart’s desire the executioner stares with empty eyes at the well worn handle of his axe so lovingly sharpened red and black the blood pools under the strobing light of forever in succinct and succulent sprays time is […]

in increments

if i don’t wake from slumber know you were the last thing to sit happily in my mind before i drifted on it’s safe to say before whatever end i face i will close my eyes see your face and smile that’s enough for this fool because every time i open them and you are […]

sentence

her gaze cut like a guillotine dropping my mind into the wicker basket beneath her voice was a life sentence in my ear no wish for parole her touch sent voltage coursing through eager nerves convulsing in ecstacy her scent a lethal injection of bliss coming intoxicatingly from her every pore the taste of her […]

yellow

i watch the rain fall on the funeral procession unable to make out the faces in the crowd of mourners huddled together in all black under gray skies sobbing only the tractor seems to celebrate life with yellow iron and gouts of smoke from the idling engine the priest waves his hands but his words […]

first brush

my first brush with death was watching my grandmother waste away in her bed, she had lost both legs years prior but was still a stern and beautiful woman in the end she was a husk that barely recognized we were there as she lay panting in her too large bed, the light slowly fading […]

simplicity

everyone of the words was another red hot dagger into his soul. how many more barbs could he stand before finally succumbing to the pain and snuffing the candle himself? a new scar to remind him of how fleeting the old scars were. his flesh more a topographical map of sorrow than that of a […]

after

the leaves were the color of a freshly newborn child, that purplish red of a soon to be bruise. the sunlight filtered down and danced upon the ground. a slight breeze tried to blow from the north but sputtered before accomplishing much. i sat with my back against the tree, wondering how it all came […]

same room

fear knots my guts terror stricken cold sweat shaking knees * voices in the darkness * she tied a string around my finger a reminder of what is unclear * i remember dying agony convulsing bleeding out on the cold tile of the kitchen floor * there was no bright light no choir of angels […]

calendar (complete)

(january) an ex was born this month, a mistake that led to two perfectly carved diamonds frozen broken huddled in a ball ripped and torn spikes of ice ragged wounds crimson ice (february) my father was born this month, flawed and brilliant, my hero despite my own actions shortness of breath wheezing spots in my […]

calendar pt III

(september) this is typically when the rains begin again, when the thirsty soil turns vibrant again, reborn to die confusion refusal self destruction with no understanding this life is a break between infinities (october) laughter fills the night, the crinkle of plastic costumes, faces painted like the visage of death burning leaves the icy chill […]

one final act of insignificance

use my bloated corpse as a boat to traverse these moss choked waterways let me do that much for you one last bold sacrifice in a long string of meaningless gestures god knows in life i did nothing worthy of your attention deficit just dug deeper into anonymity a burr inside your wet socks at […]

(un)requited III

my cologne is eau de whiskey and percocet i tied the noose around my own throat but your whispered words were the rope i hear the ice clink in the glass of your abject disinterest so i wobble back and forth on the dotted yellow line playing chicken with truck drivers and blindfolded emotional investment […]

twelve tolls

it was near midnight the chill of winter’s breath was beginning to take hold a small howl came from the west distant lonely the scent of diesel filled the air the only other sound was that of my heels hitting the gravel down this road i knew led to redemption but it also led to […]

Rain III

Rain, a love story Rain II I’ve lost track of time. I couldn’t say for sure if it has meaning in a place like this. If it ever had meaning at all really. There are no clocks on the plain wood paneled walls. Just the red display that steadily clicks upwards. The plain voice that […]

my funeral

at my funeral i want you to repeat the worst things i ever said, the things that made you squirm as you laughed celebrate the awkward silences all of the times I took it too far, said the wrong thing at the absolute right time no tears for the corpse in the cheap wooden crate […]

waking

the biggest fear of life is waking from it’s dream or was it a nightmare only the dead can say and they’ve grown quiet so very quiet as of late

calcified in you

when i die i want you to take my heart and calcify it then wrap it in every poem i wrote about my feelings for you let it drink in the love i spilled the words drenched in you your beauty of wildflowers in your hair your blood like wine stains upon my lips let […]

if you asked

i don’t wish your lover would die but if he had an accident i wouldn’t be overwrought with sorrow i would never raise a fist in anger but if he truly made a mess i would be on a plane to you by tomorrow call it jealousy or just need but before bed i pray […]

shudders

rainy days like these remind me of when i fought in the secret war to liberate canada from their beaver overlords the battlefields smelled of maple syrup bullets and bodies were strewn aboot we fought hard across the frozen tundra against the furry bastards on top of their moose mounts war is hell, eh the […]

morb(i)d love

losing her was like baking cookies in sylvia plath’s oven seering in the flavors of sorrow and loss holding her was like going swimming with virgina woolf the currents of her body drawing me under staring at her was like skeet shooting with hemmingway’s shotgun the aim was immaculate deadly and serene loving her was […]

consc(i)ous

scientists have discovered people are aware of the moment they die they are aware of conversations after the time of death has been called hearing nurses talk people sob immobile fading but listening the bright light of final oxygenated blood fading from the cerebral cortex traveling into the infinite vortex gasping grasping fleeting still heart […]

destiny

this isn’t where he thought he’d end up, this isn’t where he hoped to be, the fortune teller said she saw him free like the breeze but he never expected to be a macabre law ornament she read his palm, his life line lost at sea, his love line a hyphenated long since erased, he’d […]

chills

chills race down his spine someone stepped on his grave his long dead grandmother would have said am i dead he wonders and if so why does it still feel so fucking painful she doesn’t answer of course she doesn’t she’s dead maybe they both are he really can’t tell he wonders as the chills […]

grave(digger)

i held her like a gravedigger clutching a shovel she was rigid and i knew she would leave blisters even on my calloused hands still i held her like a gravedigger clutching a shovel to dig his own grave and i knew deep down six feet part of me would die from holding her but […]

always pretty

she called me asked me to come over said she didn’t want to be alone she never called anymore the last time she said was the last time but she was always prone to hyperbole i always told her she was the best at it but the joke never seemed to stick i got dressed […]

same age

i’m nearly the same age as my father nearly the same age as my father when he died i’m nearly the same age as my father when he finally bought a bar an alcoholic dream to be surrounded by your vice no one can tell you a thing drink whenever the hell you want every […]

a final kiss

my friends my friends i’ve discovered i am dying this incurable disease called life is slowly killing me oh how i scream in frustration bellowing out to the heavens to save me for the lips i have yet to kiss and breasts left to ogle i need another hundred years, make it two i beg […]

no one knows

if a poet dies in the woods and no one is around to hear does it reek of desperate longing or just go unnoticed does the world pause in the passing or continue to spin does the universe sigh in relief or in loss of so much potential she stood on the railing if the […]

a warning

having trouble catching the air, like breathing under water feel so cold even as the fever flares If this is the end let it come, i’m ready so tired of feeling this way and ready for a fight bring your pale horse you rotten bastard, i’ll feed it apples til it chokes your scythe means […]

a final wish

she knelt on the steps of the pagoda cherry blossoms filled the air around her the wind whistled through the bamboo and the cicadas sang a solemn song of loss and from the hills came the roar of the great beast the sky itself began to burn the doctor cancelled the surgery scheduled an appointment […]

the spider

he kept meticulous notes in the small black book in his jacket pocket, written in code only he knew the cipher to to the normal person it would seem random dots and squiggles but to him it was the key to everything the secrets of the universe, of god, of man and of terrible hunger […]

lilies

she dumped his body in a shallow grave, next to the tree where he first proposed, a bunch of sticks to mark his place, down where the lilies grow it was her fault that he wound up dead, with some help from her hatchet, perhaps she didn’t mean to strike him down, but his back […]

endings

i think about death a lot too much my death not suicide though if i had a nickel for everytime that though had occured i could pay for therapy and a bottle of pills that would stop the incessant erections and thoughts about i think about death a lot not sure how you quantify a […]

brink of jazztinction

thunder lizards on the horizon subtle shaking as they roam closer stark technicolor nightmares viscera a low upright bass off scene buh doom boom boom boom boom boom boom buh doom boom boom boom fingers run down the ivory keys the tyrannosaurus snaps a brush across the cymbal nostrils flared the scent of prey on […]

death, she whispered

i asked her for her name and she only whispered death i chuckled but she didn’t even smile the closer i looked at her the more indistinct she seemed to grow the room chilled as she grew near i tried to make small talk but she was indifferent at best, disinterested and bored with subtle […]

she comes

she came to me again last night it was quiet and i had fallen asleep but i woke to the feel of her lips on my cheek this was unhealthy, needed to stop, but before i could actualize these thoughts i had fallen into her embrace i grow weaker with every taste, she feeds on […]

scentual

and she stared at me, her antennae twitched as she gnawed upon the gnarled remains of her lover as her limbs jerked and orgamsic moaning still punctuated the air silently, still but for her noises and the crunching of carapace like shells i crouched low and stilled my rapidly beating heart, the surge of adrenaline […]

flight plan

the flight was delayed a half an hour then we boarded and sat for half an hour and then they had us get off and asked for volunteers to stay but i remembered feeling the plane move did we take off crash as i was sleeping and then begin a loop of flying and waiting […]

corpse blossoms

sitting alone on the roof of my car in the middle of nowhere watching as the world ends around me it wasn’t the brimstone and fires of mythos no unshackled tentacle faced creature crawled from the abyss the skies were clear with no ever growing meteor streaking down turns out the end of the world […]

for one

tiptoeing across the graves of the not so recently deceased, masoleums of lives gone past, gone passed, gone too soon the stench of decay like expensive perfume, permeating and penetrating and passively erasing all olfactory common scents wilted roses in a vase, dessicated and distracting from the flickering reminders of what was supposed to be […]

work

lost in these ever changing mazes of chain link fences and angry men in hard hats showers of sparks and spent water bottles like a bread crumbs left by pollutant little children it’s already too hot sweat dripping from the twenty minute walk from rental car to machine humidity and stagnant air make it all […]

arachnophilia

i’ve got spiders nesting under my skin for christsakes they crawl and bite and scramble up and down inside my arms laying eggs in my veins oxygen depleted blood cells rush them back into my heart and lungs a vast network of the damned things slowly taking over my meat like it is a series […]

come in and lie down

they built suicide pods that look like tanning beds for all the advances in medication the one treatment they always tend to forget is for the incorrigible symptom of living pay the fee press the button go to sleep commerce boiled down to it’s finest point you get what you pay for even if it […]

shell

she was shriveled once so strong and imposing one look and you stood straighter and minded your manners now she was half the size a quarter of the weight all loose skin and wires the room smelled like shit from the bag half hanging off the bed a clear tube with brown piss oozing into […]

dancing alone

there’s a tripwire running from my brain to heart, strung with care down my spinal column and lined with explosives dilligently monitoring for any signs of emotional disruption from daily business all it takes is a flutter do you know how hard it is to operate on yourself to rip yourself open saw through flesh […]

duat

much to my dismay my eyes opened again this morning it has been weeks of this grainy black and white superlative existence the crackle of film as it rotates through the projector no one here speaks a tongue i can form not that i don’t understand the language per se it is that they speak […]

peeping tom

i’m aware of death watching me his black robe and skeletal hands peering from the bushes outside the window the whinny of his pale horse as he rides it down the path he stares at me in longing like i’m a pair of lips he needs to kiss or a pair of breasts to ogle […]

inept assassin

i was walking down the sidewalk when something shiny caught my eye i bent to pick it up a quarter my lucky day as i picked it up a dart came through the air and lodged into tree next to me i heard the thud as it hit i glanced at it and shook my […]

matter of time

the light turned on but her pupil never shifted the light turned on and flooded the room with incandescent brilliance, illuminating all, casting shadows in the corners in her eyes the light has gone off flickering fluorescents cast a yellow pall upon her body, the lack of chest movement indicating what was gone from the […]

a sensual autopsy

my beautiful insanity on pubic display, my heart turned circular from all the time my mind spent in space my misfired synaptical responses from concussions and spinal infractions, the scar where my appendix once lived all marrow and sinew, detached retinas and cavernous sinus cavities in the now vacant skull, finally emptied of the words […]