much to my dismay my eyes opened again this morning

it has been weeks of this grainy black and white superlative existence

the crackle of film as it rotates through the projector

no one here speaks a tongue i can form

not that i don’t understand the language per se

it is that they speak in symbols

towering figures on golden thrones nod to me as i form a caravan of one

but when i ask where i am they just show a star in a circle

that means something to someone but not me and not now

a pyramid gradually takes shape as dune after dune are conquered by unwilling steps

there a jackyl headed man in pristine white robes sits before an old set of scales and i watch as a line forms in front of him

the desert around us with a static background on loop with the occasional missing frame

like leaving the dentist and the novacaine has everything at half gravity

my face has no feeling and my feet are sore from the constant trek over dunes

i rode a camel once

a bouncing jostling beast with a terrible attitude who showed no signs of hurry

wish that despicable bastard was here so i could take a nap between her furry humps

a commotion at the scales draws my attention but it feels like looking through honey

the scales are battered bronze and the person facing the hybrid of gross deification and dna splicing balances a heart and feather

they teeter back and forth until just barely the heart sits lower

everyone watches in anticipation

a shimmering river winds next to the table

previously unseen a nebulous winding of gray against the gray of the sands

but as the heart rested a millimeter under that black plume ripples dance on the surface

a crocodile the size of a tanker breaks the surface with nary a splash

it launches high into the air and with a savage snap of too many jagged teeth consumes the heavy hearted shade

the line moves quickly or i am just so out of it i don’t feel the passage of time

but i find myself staring into the eyes of this creature that seems so familiar

he beckons towards the scales and i do my best to decline his generous offer of consumption

knowing well that no feather could ever outweigh the ball of scar tissue

he gestures again and i feel the ire of the gathering throngs behind me

fine

with unsteady fingers i tear the skin and bones and remove the shriveled thing and place it into his well manicured hand

he places it on one side and feather on the other

bubbles in the water

the sides of the scale at war with each other and an eternity passes as they dip and rise

i just close my eyes and listen to the wind

uncaring or uninterested

maybe just resigned to fate

or understanding no judgement could be as harsh as the one i already cast upon myself

sobek burrowed beneath sands licks his lips eagerly

do your worst