the silence beats down watching the ceiling again at a loss for words the sadness seems to be all in a solo frame of mind souljacker up loud looking for answers to life the question seem moot but just once i’d like to hear some reasonable reply born and die alone moving slowly between them […]
she knelt on the steps of the pagoda cherry blossoms filled the air around her the wind whistled through the bamboo and the cicadas sang a solemn song of loss and from the hills came the roar of the great beast the sky itself began to burn the doctor cancelled the surgery scheduled an appointment […]
is this heaven or hell, i can’t tell the difference that well, kneeling before the throne in supplication, or in a pit of flesh eating ants sing a song of six pence, a pocket full of lies, until the best parts of this child atrophy and die i sit on the wall awaiting the fall […]
she’s summer i’m winter she’s water i’m oil she’s beauty i’m scarred she’s courage i’m scared together we could be something new something stronger stranger better more she’s spring i’m autumn she’s perfect i’m flawed she’s scripture i’m fiction she’s poetry written by a master’s pen i love her she’s etched in my soul carved […]
he kept meticulous notes in the small black book in his jacket pocket, written in code only he knew the cipher to to the normal person it would seem random dots and squiggles but to him it was the key to everything the secrets of the universe, of god, of man and of terrible hunger […]
she is the answer to the question that sits on the edge of your frontal lobe but never forms an art exhibit of images that project onto the blank canvas of your heart and soul she is
i cannot see, this fallacy, this faded sea, this infancy sadness, madness, sorrowful morose, singular, modular, scented malaise shake the plastic eight ball and show me my future, all of my answers hidden in the murky blue depths all signs point to the emptiness the uncertain certainty of cerulean cynicism sinking softly into saline daydreams […]
when i opened myself to her my guts came out like writhing vipers that hissed and snapped at the autumn air in angry knots my bones like broken glass held together by rusted barb wire and muscles like slugs perch upon the slick ivory calcified remains when i told her i loved her she recoiled […]
she is the ferocity of the storm wrapped in the comfort of a home you have only dreamt of the curvature of the horizon, so tantalizingly within sight but always just out reach she is
is he crying, choking on the words of sorrow, lost in reverie do they run down his cheek as he stares at the storm, unseeing the loss, trapped in himself, wishing it could all be different no, it is the reflection of the rain on the glass on his face it seems nothing more than […]
the colors seem to bleed off of the page, pooling onto the floor and forming an ink blotch as i stare at the stain it morphs and shifts nothing matters in the black oblivion and i feel myself sliding down into it a free fall into a shimmering lake of mercury that coalesces and forms […]
lethologica and fregoli delusion settle in every face is the same no names endless crowds of strangers in a room full of friends i’ve said certain words so many times semantic satiation has set in the neural pathways have been burned from my mind so if i look you in the eyes and have no […]
when i opened myself to her my guts came out like writhing vipers that hissed and snapped at the autumn air in angry knots my bones like broken glass held together by rusted barb wire and muscles like slugs perch upon the slick ivory calcified remains when i told her i loved her she recoiled […]
they said there was snow back home today how i long for those swollen gray clouds and the soft flakes to fall upon my upturned face it is raining here today far from frozen wonderlands and left dreary and sad no slush upon my shoes no frost upon my beard just the haze of misty […]
it was too early to be so angry the cars sat parked on the highway angry faces glared into mirrors at angry faces staring back somewhere ahead angry men shouted at angry men and held up the whole works the angry wail of sirens filled the unmoving roads soon angry men in uniforms would make […]
she sat and stared out the window watching the people on the street her finger idly stirred the ice in her drink as she bit her lip schopenhauer described her best at first i refused to admit she existed, when i found her i was petrified to approach, now i calmly accept her as fact […]
she is the full moon at midnight singing a mesmerizing soliloquy into my soul across the sea the scent of lilacs on a warm summer breeze teasing the coming day filled with promise she is
feverish need for coffee, freezing and desperate for relief stumble half drunken sober steps shaking from waves of sickness fresh filter, run water, got grounds, doing fine sprinkle cinnamon, hint of vanilla, dash of salt, let’s percolate clumsy elbow, paying no attention, hear the shatter dismay bottle of hot sauce across linoleum, an ocean of […]
she is a shadow cast during an eclipse, the penumbra causing her image to flicker with frantic light distortion an ultra high definition image of sublime beauty in a cathode ray tube black and white world she is
she peeled strips of flesh off of my chest and drew in my blood on the sheets we lie upon sketching vistas of pain and pleasure upon the egyptian cotton as i tremble in rapture she picks apart my failings with a practiced hand and finds beauty in my hidden parts my body is her […]
“Good morning. Oh. What the fuck happened to your face?” “Is it noticeable?” “You have a black eye and your lips is swollen. It is slightly noticeable.” “There was an altercation.” “Tell me the other guy looks worse than you.” “No.” “No? You didn’t fight back?” “No.” “What happened?” “Do you remember the girl from […]
he is a man and all that means he is confused comes out fists swinging emotionally stunted he doesn’t cry he doesn’t show pain he is the rock he is a tornado a force of destruction he is a man and all that means he is bile he is hate he is anger raining down […]
i don’t much care for needles, but i would let you inject yourself into my vein and travel throughout my body just to feel you in my blood as it pounds against my head, to know that in that rhythm you played along and sang i don’t think about the needle when the nurse jams […]
no fake smile today, no pretending it doesn’t hurt, that it is not falling to pieces reserving the right to write the truth, when truthfully the lies come easier less poetic to usher in the fall less romantic to curl up in a ball but jagged aches are all a part of the process, and […]
she is beautiful like a thunderstorm making love to a funeral procession the kiss of the blade on unscarred flesh, the slow pooling of blood under the moon she is
oh the sting, the venomous stinger in which the words inject poison into an already poisonous vein not a good fit, not the right theme, the words of your soul did not shine the right way, did not convey but please try again spit more of your lack of talent into space, bare yourself to […]
“—” “Um. Mona.” “What.” “Good morning.” “I’m mad at you.” “For what?” “What was the rule?” “Don’t sleep with Mona’s friends.” “Why was that a rule?” “They are vampires and will suck the life out of me.” “And what did you do?” “Not slept with Mona’s friends.” “No. You did worse.” “I didn’t do anything.” […]
she dumped his body in a shallow grave, next to the tree where he first proposed, a bunch of sticks to mark his place, down where the lilies grow it was her fault that he wound up dead, with some help from her hatchet, perhaps she didn’t mean to strike him down, but his back […]
hello been a while since i wrote a letter, so bear with me as i remember the curves and diction necessary to form the phrases of conversation hope things are good for you, that your dreams and wants are exceeded by a bountiful harvest of joy that when you wake to the kiss of golden […]
drag my body to the river let it float out towards the sea drag my body to the river don’t shed a tear for me wrap my heart with barbed wire, broken fingers from too many fights, chewed glass every morning, drank gasoline on sleepless nights i didn’t go looking for trouble, but it followed […]
hold me like insomnia, love me like depression, fill the empty half of the bed i can never quite lay in for fear of crushing your memory, in memorial of what slipped like grains of sand through the hourglass shape of you in my mind wrap your arms around me like pain, paint my skin […]
i was born on all saint’s day, but was supposed to have been here to celebrate a fool getting lost, guess this fool got lost as well and this may have set his course for a life of misread maps and faulty compass distinction born to be a fighter, spent the first ten years learning […]
it’s raining thunder rumbles outside and i sit with coffee and stare at it my mind sees none of it though inside i toil along with the raging storms a hurricane of my own brain lightning flashes leaving a purple after glow and still my eyes see nothing the coffee grows cold in the mug […]
today’s the day i tell myself, gonna write that poem that sets hearts on fire, minds ablaze just need to sit down and let the images flow after coffee now to just let the words pour out maybe eat lunch well, now i’m awfully full and the words prefer a little hunger so i’ll take […]
every morning i hear her outside talking on the phone as her little dog sniffs and pisses on everything she complains endlessly about how all men are pigs and only are after one thing she moved in three months ago above me the little dog runs back and forth, nails skipping and scraping across the […]
“Good morning.” “Seven.” “Seven what?” “Assholes cut me off this morning.” “And you lost all trace of common courtesy?” “I don’t know if I had the slightest trace to begin with. Is that like con science?” “Con science? What the fuck it that?” “Hell if I know. That thing that makes you feel bad for […]
you shine so brightly, a flickering flame in the darkness of the world i dance in shadow, drawn to the fires that will surely burn me to ash a moth to your flame, a human projectile destined to explode with your touch can’t you hear my begging, open a window and let me dart about […]
normally i would write something to go along but this says it all sometimes the music can sum it all up for me better than i can so listen to him say the words i wish i could since i know i can’t close your eyes my love imagine me singing this softly in your […]
it’s not often the words fail me, not often i’m left without something to say, they flee my head and scamper off but nothing clever comes to mind, no flowery phrase finds blossom upon my tongue and spreads it’s pollen down the page she sends a flurry of electrical impulses down my every nerve, lights […]
mountains don’t rise until after the earthquake, the caves don’t form without the stream glaciers carved the plains into valleys, the volcanos created the islands of paradise every crag so painstakingly accidentally created, random works of wonder what will happen to me now that i have discovered you, what new piece will be formed, be […]
she smiled at me and kissed me hard on the lips, i wanted more but she pushed me back and laughed, a promise of more after she pulled her back into a pony tail and winked at me, that mischievous smile that made me fall in love with her in the first place then we […]
cerulean skies and warm beams of golden light to bask in, the rustle of leaves on threadbare trees, the squirrels search for hidden spoils unspoiled by the touch of man seeking solace from this wracking cough, this somber sickness that infuses and drains, the scratching of pencil on the pad and furious erasing of another […]
i entered the club with a secret knock on the bannister in the hall, shave and a haircut the dour hatchet faced man that stood like a pile of stones stared at me as i passed him i nodded and went to the bar, the girl behind smiled at me and got my order without […]
skimming the tops of the clouds during early morning flight, naked and glittering with moisture, the occasional ray of light sending spots across vision it’s a dream, must be, the blanket is off, the fan is blowing, laying in superman flight and skating the tender blue above and fat gray promises of rain just below […]
il n’a pas la volonté de parler, alors il regarde la fenêtre seul en silence son âme fait mal pour elle, elle es son tout, mais il ne peut pas lui dire ce qu’il ressent perhaps a different tongue, another language will allow the words to spill fully formed from his mouth je taime mon […]
lucid dreams in which you’re near bending laws of time and space wishing just for you to be here the lies of fate seem all too clear like the lines upon my face lucid dreams in which you’re near doubts with ugly heads that rear of futility in which i need to chase wishing just […]
i thought my heart was in a state of arrhythmia, my head aches and my mind only seems capable of focusing on her out sequence throbbing in my veins i rest two fingers in wrist and try and call my nerves two quick pulses one quick one long two quick three long three quick one […]
you see a tripwire, i see a means to an end. it feels as if society is a dogearred copy of salinger from flipping its collective shit. all the while i cut myself not to make the pain real but to make sure i am still capable of bleeding. that they did not swoop in […]
“Good morning.” “Morning Mona.” “You seem chipper.” “My work bestie met my outside work besties. It was a momentous occasion.” “It was?” “It wasn’t?” “They were nice.” “Uh oh.” “Well. They were different.” “Oh yeah. For sure.” “What did you tell them about me?” “Your name and we work together.” “That’s all?” “Yep. Why?” “Well. […]
the words kept singing and she grew tired of my heeding their call and went to bed, angry at me, tired of being ignored it wasn’t as if i did it on purpose i just can’t leave something half done it was half an hour later when i slowly opened the door and crept into […]
depression is giving me the silent treatment lately oh she still clings to me and weighs down my normal, is my normal but she is mad i don’t talk about her as much as i used to i think she is jealous just another her thinking she is the her that fills my heart and […]
she has this ability to derail my train of thought, to collapse the tunnel and rend the tracks from the earth she is the light at the end, barrelling towards me with no regard to decorum or my fleeting sense of self just the billowing black smoke of inevitability, signals i cannot read wafting high […]
shutting down the system for maintenance, stuck in the same loop, depression, loneliness, silence, not enough, set a sail in a rickety boat with more leaks than leg room on a dry river bed of desire distant howls signalling they come to feed again, slavering maws and jagged fangs, eyes devoid of all but hunger, […]
the cold light of morning tends to shine upon you things we don’t want to see the loss of the day before the wreckage we stumble away from seems so much worse as the muscle ache sets in and the adrenaline wears off the snapshots in our mind, a jumble of blurring colors, all seems […]
the cat watches the fish swim the fish is in an imbecilic daze swimming in lazy circles there is no thought in it’s vacant little eyes the cat has nothing but malice as it stares i clear my throat a sure sign to her that i know what she is thinking she looks at me […]
restless leg syndrome has taken over my entire frame vibrating molecular motion in tune with another dimension occasional bleed over occurs tabbies with moth wings sentient knives with thick eastern european accents my legs are caught in a fisherman’s net and the tolling of the bell on the buoy calls out staggered steps towards the […]
“Good morning.” “But is it?” “A good morning? Sure.” “Hmmm.” “What happened?” “I don’t even know how to describe it.” “You don’t know how to describe something? Hold on, I need to jot this down on my calendar.” “For what?” “Do you know how rare it is when you are at a loss?” “Somewhat often?” […]
i think about death a lot too much my death not suicide though if i had a nickel for everytime that though had occured i could pay for therapy and a bottle of pills that would stop the incessant erections and thoughts about i think about death a lot not sure how you quantify a […]
shifts in time zones and early morning flights a full body sense of discombobulation i meant to read but woke three hours later as the tablet fell with a surprisingly jarring impact against my face panic set in where am i, whose bed is this, why is it so cold in here eyes refusing to […]
I saw her as I was waiting in line at Target. I don’t know what made me look up from my phone. Yes I was staring at my phone. I don’t do the self check out bullshit. The last time I was standing there screaming at the machine that the fucking bread was in the […]
irradiated in the solar rays isotopical failure half life full life no life left mutated designated reinstated ridicule falling farther from the light of day ensconced in shadow left with waxy feathers and an expired lottery ticket roaming the world alone a modern day daedelus craftsman destined to watch the ones he loves scorched and […]
this life beats me to a pulp and all i can do is curl up in a ball and let fate dry fuck me into oblivion i picture you and it all smooths out a little this a part meant hell this impossible need for more in a world of dwindling hope you shine like […]
don’t wear a seat belt lest you drown in your own urine, a placard attached to the peg board next to my soul and daddy says come to the kingdom of light and rejoice, i feel a tankard short of a viking funeral two hands for the players, one for the house, keep your sentences […]
i carved your initials into the bench by the tree under the moon where we once sat and promised forever to one another in foolish abandon do you remember the promises we whispered into one another’s ears while we made love under the stars did we make love i ask myself or did we affirm […]
the voices whisper constantly a litany an invocation white noise in the background of every quiet moment gentle tolling of the bell the dagger the cup an entire tarot deck come alive thousand fates unfold at once don’t go that way this path is fraught with peril death danger failure inconceivable torment allegorical ache irreparable […]
Three years and fifty one weeks ago “Good morning.” “I’ve made a huge mistake.” “Is this how we start our morning?” “With you being pleasant and me running from crisis to crisis? God, I hope not.” “What crisis?” “I’m an idiot.” “It’s only been a week but I think I can agree to that statement.” […]
in the moments before dawn, right before the tendrils of light push the darkness back, that sublime moment of anticipation and fear what new horrors will be cast in shadow, the hidden face of primal fears and knots in sub-gastrointestinal distress will be shown it is a time of truth, where the machiavellian plots of […]
just another social anxiety flare up one of those public autopsies encouraging hashtags and in depth analysis no one cares what i think so when the inevitable breakdown occurs audacious ineffectualness a murder of crows settles silently on the fence a conspiracy of ravens on the church steeple universally inept coroners conduct a social autopsy […]
thunder lizards on the horizon subtle shaking as they roam closer stark technicolor nightmares viscera a low upright bass off scene buh doom boom boom boom boom boom boom buh doom boom boom boom fingers run down the ivory keys the tyrannosaurus snaps a brush across the cymbal nostrils flared the scent of prey on […]
i asked her for her name and she only whispered death i chuckled but she didn’t even smile the closer i looked at her the more indistinct she seemed to grow the room chilled as she grew near i tried to make small talk but she was indifferent at best, disinterested and bored with subtle […]
you are beautiful as i float along this gentle winding river of shattered dreams and fluttering moths of yesterday gathering the pieces i’ve so carelessly let go over time pieces of me of you of strangers glittering little baubles of broken hearts and souls well wishes and wandering eyes as the words fall in fat […]
the bible says man gave a rib to make woman i’d give another rib to have you here, in front of me, to just whisper my eternal love to you i would use my tears to moisten the clay beneath me so i could sculpt an effigy of you to show my devotion but my […]
“Good morning.” “Hi! How are you?” “I’m doing well.” “Awesome. I’m Mike. Looks like we are going to be sharing this room together.” “It does. I’m Mona.” “Is your middle name Lisa?” “What? Oh. No.” “Get that a lot?” “No.” “Oh. Seems like an obvious question.” “I guess it does.” “I’m sorry. I’m rambling. I […]
and as the world crumbles down around us all i can wish for is to feel your hand upon my cheek your lips on mine to gaze into your eyes as it turns to ash there could be no greater way to go my sweet lost love you were the most wonderful dream in a […]
so many thoughts fly none of them fill me like you like this bottle here i’m empty and discarded headed for the bin outside nothing fills me up it all just leaks down my face what a fucking waste another vessel ignored left to be broken again open another let the liquid slosh about and […]
i came home to find her asleep in my bed she had on my shirt, too long and big for her but she wore it so well she was laying still and i watched her as she slept memories of a hundred nights of lying next to her i let her sleep didn’t climb in […]
there’s a quivering in my abdomen, a fear begins to grow, the words they come a spilling out, there is nothing left to show fear is just uncertainty, and trauma seeds to sow, armageddon is two blocks away, my head’s about to blow the razor runs perpendicular to the raised scar tissue that starts to […]
i know i’m a human the question i’m feeling this one has me reeling am i a human being being anything, just a walking corpse, just a stain, a pain, another moron penning sad refrains am i here can you hear am i a human being being anything but a carbon dioxide dispenser, a tear […]
she said if you’re playing with me, you’re likely going to drown so i dove in headfirst i let her churning waves and mysterious depths consume me no need for a deep breath not in her oxygenated embrace the farther down i swam, the more i needed to explore all sensation of up and down […]
did i tell you i dreamt of you last night no how could i we don’t really talk i would have though in the dream i was back up north a place we have never been not together at least i went to the bar that i always went to and remembered falsely you went […]
can you see yourself through the lens of another person’s bend, if you could would you look hummingbirds and preying mantises prance along the feeder outside my window i know how this will play out, another bird carcass littering the ground what does the bird see, just a bundle of patiently staring green sticks what […]
“Good morning!” “Sure.” “What’s wrong?” “The hospital sucked.” “They do.” “But…” “Oh no. What did you do?” “Did I ever tell you how much I like scrubs?” “The clothes or the TLC song?” “Both.” “No. You never mentioned that. Either.” “And you know what the nurses all wear?” “Please tell me you didn’t…” “So this […]
the taste of whiskey will always be synonymous with your lips, the feel of your hair as i pull it, the taste of your throat as i hold your head back the sweet burn as it goes down and the smell of your perfume as we pull over just so we can kiss some more […]
bananas have tryptophan and trace amounts of radioactive potassium if i eat twenty five million bananas and the radiation and consumption don’t kill me i could gain superpowers or sleep throughout the night either or is a best case scenario am i willing to go to such desperate measures when i close my eyes i […]
my life has become an abandoned camp ground, when i explore it seems i’m always traveling past tents, in the past tense, by fires that raged but left blackened circles of stone and half whittled confessions if you close your eyes you can hear camp songs echo over the trees, which is funny because i’ve […]
our relationship was a ménage à trois, this love that we shared, those secrets we bared it was her, me and crippling emotional divestment sharing a mattress of exposed springs and pillows wet with tears she’d tie me in knots with her pretty tongue and leave me drenched in sweaty denials when she placed her […]
he came crawling out of the woods, his femur broken and pushed through the skin, the smell of infectious rot permeating the air his eyes unfocused, finger tips covered in blood and the ragged remains of fingernails everyone stopped what they were doing to stare at him as he pulled himself slowly along the ground […]
even in dream in a world of pretend when my mind is free to make believe it is an empty void while awake grand visions dance and frolic but when all is quiet it is that distinct lack of anything that smothers my head shhh no need to remind that she doesn’t exist let me […]
give it a couple minutes to kick in, she whispered in an evil tone playfully how will i know it is working i asked nervously you will know my head snapped back as fireworks blossomed across my optic nerve i was on the back of an otter, if it was huge or i was small […]
“Hello?” “—” “Mona?” “—” “What in the hell? Hello!” “Hello Michael.” “Hello? Who’s there?” “I’m hurt. You don’t know who I am?” “There’s no one there.” “Isn’t that how you always described me? An absentee father?” “I doubt it. The only one I ever describe like that is…” “Go on…” “No.” “Come on.” “No way.” […]
1) she stared at me waiting for me to make the first move in my head i knew i should lean forward and kiss her knew it was what we both wanted all i could do was stare into her eyes 6) she pulled me down the hallway to show me the framed pictures of […]
she wore a shirt that said eat me, drink me and i was ravenous dying of thirst willing to go down that rabbit hole a tea service for two smiling when she announced it was off with my head told her i loved her she grimaced said that was seven impossible things she’d heard before […]
More creative haiku collaboration with HelloLauren based on her post . ***** Brokenhearted one Sad secrets are in the shards Blue melancholy misery abounds happiness has no home here all hope abandoned Wretched, sick, flailing Questioning my existence End this lonely life everything ends except for this solitude no one hears my cries Though they […]
i loved, i lived and i lost, ghosted and roasted by an egregious flame that sputters and flickers chasing shadows across the lawn, invisible puppeteers and the strings they tug and yank,jerking movements and motion sickness on full display my soul is a greasy soap bubble floating through a forest of thorns, anxiety and ill […]
if you knew the effort it takes to sand down my horns, to hide my blackened wings, to keep my tarnished halo hidden, these cloven hooves require special boots often it is forgotten i can be the lightbringer, the chosen child before my being cast out, my fall more famous than my earlier position as […]
the steady hum of the dual solenoids firing rapidly, needles driving deep into epidermal artistry, wiping blood and excess ink away as the pattern takes shape, like a thousand nettles, an angry swarm of beautiful bees, lost in the endorphin surge, elevated the story of my life with another indoctrination, every new scar, every new […]
“Good morning.” “No.” “Excuse me.” “I said no.” “I heard that.” “Okay.” “I’m meant what do you mean?” “Not today Mona.” “Not today what?” “I’m not feeling up to our normal routine.” “What happened?” “Nothing. You want coffee?” “Tea. And an explanation.” “Tea it is.” Some days things go from bad to worse. Some weeks […]
she walked in like she owned the place she may have how in hell would i know the difference she came over sat at the table next to me and stared at me like i was some kind of stain on the chair cushion she pulled out a pack of smokes and carefully tapped one […]
black tar tears blister and bubble down her cheeks rusted nails across the dirty glass of her soul she has been seasoned with needles of stringent regret and left in the heat of tortured passion the tinkling keys of a piano played like the loose teeth in her smile an angel with moth wings and […]
