“Feeling better?” “Sure.” “It’s been three days. What happened?” “Not sure. Bug, I guess.” “It wasn’t a bug. It was what we asked.” “Kind of.” “Definitely. What happened?” “It’s a big deal.” “It is.” “And I know what it means to you two.” “Okay.” “But. Why me?” “Oh fuck Mikey, why not you?” “Obviously one […]
when i write about you i always write it twice one in words you can read one in braille as painstakingly difficult as it is to put myself onto the page and bare my inner thoughts to you to take the time to raise the little bunps on the sheets of paper you’ll never see […]
she didn’t remember me, no, she didn’t forget me either, instead he chose to dismember me with her mind looked past the times of smiles and joy, the laughter, the love i once thought we shared but she so selfishly kept as she walked away she remembered to tear it all apart in her mind, […]
everytime the phone rings a sense of dread and misplaced hope a break in silence another intrusionary diversion selling more unnecessary dreams, death and dismemberment of emotional dependency do you ever wish you could hit that magic button and talk to the one you need to hear the most a blank icon that reaches out […]
the human heart goes for one million dollars, yet i cannot give mine away intrinsic value compared to sense of worth i suppose but still i stand on the street playing the violin for loose change fingers dancing on the strings, eyes closed and visions of you play on in my head spinning signs on […]
“Good morning.” “Hey Mona.” “Hey?” “Hello madam, how is thou this fine summer morn?” “Better. And I am more a fair maiden. Madam seems stuffy and old.” “I stick with my prior descriptor.” “Ass.” “Barely.” “It is awfully flat back there. Is that genetic?” “No. Well maybe. I didn’t check out a lot of my […]
she mounted my head above her fireplace she ran her fingers across my skin and removed it with the razor blade she keeps in her mouth stretched it across the plywood beams and let it season in the sun before making lampshades bottled my blood in homespun glass with a sprig of mint and a […]
dear five year old me i know it hurts, shhh, it’s okay to cry, let it out, trust me i’m you no the other kids don’t wear long sleeves to cover up the bruises they don’t grimace when they sit back against the hard wooden chairs or feel the wetness on their back from a […]
she came to me again last night it was quiet and i had fallen asleep but i woke to the feel of her lips on my cheek this was unhealthy, needed to stop, but before i could actualize these thoughts i had fallen into her embrace i grow weaker with every taste, she feeds on […]
am a light bulb swinging in a dark basement, the filament is tenuous and the next flip of the switch, surge of voltage could be the last, glowing a burnt sienna when once it was white hot illumination a festering wound filled with maggots that no matter how ravenous can not eat the spoil away […]
the knife slid upwards between his ribs like an eagle diving into the placid waters there was little resistance as it slid through lung and heart his knees immediately went weak and he slumped forward she caught him before he could hit the ground his eyes met her’s and the pain was not from the […]
sometimes i need this a driving bassline to blast to erase the edge turn it up louder and go lose myself in the music when the world goes dark and my head is lost in space i need an escape something to shake the malaise to lift me up when i’m down this song never […]
“Did you see that shit out there?” “Good morning.” “Yeah. Whatever. Seriously. Did you see that shit?” “I’m fine Mike. No, we just stayed in and watched television. Thanks for asking.” “Mona. I’m glad your life has become a routine of television and vanilla sex. I’m happy to see domestic bliss is upon you. Did […]
and still i’m awake twenty hours later and sleep won’t find me i curse the walls for their silence the ceiling for it’s allure the world for it’s indifference my mind for it’s ceaseless rambles tried begging and pleading backwards counting and offset breathing how do i shut this off this mental replay seeking fanciful […]
the dead come stumbling down the street towards me hungering their vacant eyes devoid of thought staring down at their phones en masse a part of but apart from this world of the living and they outnumber us us souls still searching for a connection that doesn’t involve towers and satellites look at them mindlessly […]
she is a bolt of lightning that courses through my every thought, from the moment i wake up to when i stare at the walls halfway through the night the personification of dream, of desire, of hope, of love, distilled and made whole she is the dull ache, the sudden rush of adrenalized creation, like […]
we weren’t star crossed lovers, just two pieces of the wings, from an ill fated cross country flight, just two separate beings, we were just two bullets, fired from two shaky guns, and when we crashed it was spectacular, but nobody won you looked at me and smiled, and i gave my heart away, enchanted […]
i stayed up last night staring at the ceiling lost in thought, eyes heavy with precipitation just at the edge of falling, gathering up on my cheeks like dew what more could i do i’d like to say i fell asleep and dreams of you danced inside my head, but the ceiling was so alluring […]
just another pile of brittle bones made of kindling, kerosene for blood and paraffin wax for eyes, devoid of life but yearning for flame a laissez faire scarecrow perched on the side of life’s back road, crows perched with little regard to inane regularities she was slick with desire, legs grinding together like a cricket, […]
you wrote me a letter, an offering of secrets, i read it over and again, your trust and pulling back the curtain sparked something deep inside of me read it over and again, your perfume intoxicating, your handwriting beautiful and precise, like you, i could see the swirls and loops of your pen imagine the […]
i came to the realization today the wide open eye, breath choking in my throat, sweaty palm conclusion i’m dying it’s fine i’ve accepted it one of these days instead of angrily opening my eyes and muttering a hearty fuck you to an uncaring world i just won’t the poems will stop everything else will […]
“Good morning.” “It is now.” “Aww. Did you miss me?” “Not really. There is a spider in the corner and I think it is plotting to lay eggs in my brain. I need you to smash it good.” “I’m gone two weeks and all you missed me for was killing bugs?” “Arachnid.” “Whatever.” “I missed […]
she looked me up and down a smile on her lips let me tell you something you are a pig a real asshole you say what you want disguised as the truth as if you think it makes you better for being real it doesn’t sugar coating doesn’t make you weak would it kill you […]
on nights like this i hear the sadness echo off the rooftops the lapping waves of an ocean of tears, cold as the fan hits my face i scribble on the walls and then try and decipher the meaning of them through blurry eyes the wind through the leaves like the rattling of bones and […]
my mind is a museum, i take guided tours through the musty halls in the quiet moments those brief seconds of peace between bouts of overwhelming sorrow and confusing seconds of energetic need those are the times i am me, like when we talked, the voices grow quiet and all there is is all there […]
the first fist caught me in the side of the face, my head snapped to the side and i spat blood onto the ground the next three, well i’m a little fuzzy on those but as i launched my forehead into the bridge of the first one’s nose with a satisfying crunch and drove my […]
feels like the world shifted one degree to the right, to the left and i wouldn’t have noticed everything is perfectly normal but not like it is more difficult to put on the mask or maybe i want to see what it is like without but i’m afraid how does everyone do it so effortlessly […]
another bleak day more rain and not enough light my life spilling out affecting the world outside and on the music spins out he said he’s looking for the words that he can say and i look around all i have is those sad words but the meanings seem unclear he doesn’t know how yet […]
do you ever read what you wrote and try and recall the exact moment you knew you were so messed up that it all made sense to you, that those words meant more than random filler ever sift through the remains of your life and try to put the puzzle back together again but it […]
the day started like it always does, not with a bang but a whimper of denial, the rebound headache forcing the reminder that new day doesn’t mean fresh anything blink my eyes and wait for them to focus on the nothing surrounding me this nothing a more familiar nothing than the previous nothing of the […]
“Good morning Mona!” “—” “Oh yeah. Another week until you’re back from vacation.” “—” “This sucks.” “—” “Sometimes I question everything. Like why do I even bother. My only healthy relationship is here with you. And it is antagonistic. My life is empty. Devoid of any meaning except regaling you with stories from a better […]
my guts feel twisted up in knots as i sit here crying from words of beauty that cut through me like a hailstorm of rapturous shrapnel fired directly into my heart tapping out words of the most exquisite sorrowful joy onto a screen i can not see to a world that doesn’t see in a […]
the cat stalks me as i walk down the path every now and then the swish of it’s tail gives it away go away you stupid beast, you don’t want any of this the movement stops and i wonder if i succeeded so i continue walking along night has fallen and the tree branches hang […]
i’m not sure what i was doing the moment i realized i loved you but i remember the world stopped spinning for a second the lack of centrifugal force sent everything suddenly flying and i flew with it all cars and cows and perfect hydrogen bonded spheres of water floated weightlessly around me and i […]
in the daily life of erratic crossings and insignificant interactions it is almost unruly to one’s sense of self when another falling star intersects and the stark similarities of pain resonate, somehow pulling two indistinct patterns into focus in a fury the carefully built bomb shelter of emotional walls crumble and you find yourself naked […]
there is an old chinese proverb a man dreams of a butterfly when he wakes he wonders if he is really a man or a butterfly dreaming he is a man last night i dreamt i was a dolphin now i don’t know if i am a man or a dolphin dreaming he is a […]
did my morning workout, thought to workout the feelings, the pain, the feelings of self induced anger and hate and as i did my cardio nearly impossible as it takes three pieces of equipment to work out a broken heart as they refuse to be a team i pedalled and pedalled, like a street vendor […]
walking alone outside headphones in, try not to scowl bass rattles my skull steph raps to my soul as my hand reached out for yours but you are not here he pleads he needs more i feel the words echo deep hit repeat and zone lips move silently is this reality or another bad dream […]
did you see me staring out of the corner of my eye at you, trying my best to seem disinterested as my heart nearly ejected from my chest, the thin line of sweat on my brow, nervously tapping my foot to the beat in my head face half hidden by my phone that had a […]
you hear my words expounding upon my perception on your perfection, yet it sounds like more of the same inane banal nonsense of the pursuer desperately chasing a girl if there were a way to invent a new language one in which the subtly that has been lost in the groan inducing ones we use […]
my heart is a canary in a cage, my hands those of a coal miner, sooty black and covered in callouses i carry the cage in front of me, looking for signs of poisonous gas, when the canary dies i soon will follow, it’s a game we play every single day, walking the derelict shafts […]
“Two weeks?” “It’s called a vacation Mike. I’m entitled.” “But what about me?” “What about you?” “What am I supposed to do for two weeks?” “Listen to music. Find your center. Fuck yourself. Honestly it is all whatevs.” “Hurtful. And whatevs?” “Honest. We have been in this shitty little room for an entire year together. […]
she has the most wonderful singing voice, as she hums softly in my ear, she loves me deeper than anyone else could ever hope to she wakes me in the morning with a with a deep kiss, it reaches through my lips, down my spine, lighting every nerve on fire, curling my toes in pure […]
am i just an empty chalice, faux gold and colored glass for show, scarred and dented by my trials that i failed, left alone somewhere somewhere out in the cold there was a story told to me when i was a kid, something something good will always win, but that something something must have been […]
i could use a glass of wine, red or white, doesn’t matter just a starter need a tumbler of scotch, ten or twenty five years old just to take the edge off drink away the misery, how i want to drink away this pain, just let take a drink, before this world makes me fade […]
and she stared at me, her antennae twitched as she gnawed upon the gnarled remains of her lover as her limbs jerked and orgamsic moaning still punctuated the air silently, still but for her noises and the crunching of carapace like shells i crouched low and stilled my rapidly beating heart, the surge of adrenaline […]
in my dreams you sing this song softly as we lay together in bed take my broken parts and somehow you can make them into something pure as i stroke your hair and fall farther into you and it makes me smile the world is so cold and you’re so so far away but still […]
the dingy black and white room with scuttling cockroaches and spiders spinning traps empty bottles lay on their sides no more than vapors of past conquests two bodies lie in a tangle of sweat soaked drug induced satiation lying on a stained mattress and wrapped in a pile of rags eyes flutter under heavy lids […]
and the room feels familiar, a certain sense of two pieces clicking together the ghosts that linger, wispy forms that flutter and stare, they don’t attack but just hover and stare in a disappointment here the creeks and rattling of chains, muted screams of past lies relived, they missed having a sad soul to torture […]
a poem is a fun house mirror reflection of secret things elongated shadows trick photography sometimes Vaseline on the lens to smooth out the wrinkles other times no filter just ragged bloody claw marks and desperate screams, empty rooms and crowded elevator cars of filth and anguish happy little scenes and grotesque menageries of wounded […]
“Good morning sunshine.” “It is definitely fucking morning.” “Get up on the wrong side of the bed?” “Got up period.” “Uh oh. Someone’s a mister grumpy puss today.” “Is this what we are doing today?” “Seems like it.” “I say no.” “You’re out voted.” “How? There are two of us. If anything it is a […]
twelve hours a one and a half hour flight took twelve total to reach it’s destination storms in dallas we flew for three hours before stopping in shreveport and as we sat stopped i entertained the angry passengers telling jokes and stories keeping them laughing even as my world fell down around me ever the […]
the flight was delayed a half an hour then we boarded and sat for half an hour and then they had us get off and asked for volunteers to stay but i remembered feeling the plane move did we take off crash as i was sleeping and then begin a loop of flying and waiting […]
he has a heart like a hand grenade beware when he pops the pin his eyes are alive with radiation his gaze known to kill tongue like a rapier swift strikes deftly carving the air around him but it his heart you have to be wary of a perpetual dome of alienation surrounds him he […]
sitting on the floor of the airport, curled up in a ball, trying not to let the tears fall down my cheeks knew when i woke up today would be a shitstorm didn’t expect it to fall the way it did, as quickly as it did, as fully as it did and i am destroyed […]
uncertainty is the spice of strife study my shortcomings in hopes of long term solutions for finding a way to sink my own battleship as victory is right in reach tyrannosaurus arms and weak wrists prevent a healthy dismount from the uneven bars that regulate my life i’m not a smart man not by any […]
loving me is like wearing a shirt that is itchy, with a tag that rubs your neck raw is like a thong riding up or too tight of boxers that pinch your balls as you walk being with me is like visiting a haunted house, the ghosts surround me, blood drips from the walls and […]
taking a fine toothed comb and cleaning the crevices of an ever failing whirlwind of monotony scrubbing the tile with bleach hand and knees bleeding on the floor behind me leaving a crime scene for any would be detective to suss out is it suicide if you kill the parts of yourself you hate if […]
there are three phases to me, like i am a power conduit slapping in a mud puddle, angrily lashing out invisibly to a world that forgot i was here the first phase the best phase is beauty in everything, a sublime feeling of synchronicity, all has a purpose and falls into place the second phase […]
“How are you holding up Mikey?” “I’m good. Why, what did you hear? Did a doctor call and say something?” “A doctor? No. Wait. Why would you ask that?” “Why would you ask how I am holding up?” “What about a doctor?” “How am I holding up?” “What the fuck is happening?” “Gut instinct to […]
come to me my love twirl your body to my song our danse macabre a rictus of pain and lust the tempo drives our passion sing to me of fire of the slicing of the blade crimson drops falling your tongue across the razor your eyes locked on mine our lips pressed tightly the taste […]
they never should have been allowed up there the two of them cheek to cheek slow dancing to the music in their hearts on top of the zepplin the sounds of bombs falling guns firing explosions and distant cries of pain but none of it mattered as they gazed into each other’s eyes the starlight […]
i didn’t fall in love with you no it wasn’t a fall it was more being pushed pulled sucked in a tornado came from out of nowhere and grabbed me and launched me through the air i didn’t fall a portal opened beneath my feet when your words hit my brain my heart leapt and […]
woke up puking blood in a crimson rain that reminds me of you spit a tooth into the sink as i washed the sleep from my eyes one popped out i’m not falling apart repeating this to myself as i sew my arm back on and hope this to isn’t me i’m not sick put […]
we need to silence the poet end the inane drinking of his words slay the fool before he speaks again cut him down where he lies we need to silence the liar the con man spinning yarns the contemptuous snake oil salesman end his misery i’m tired of hearing him whine his voice grates on […]
lost in memories again in how words and art cannot pull the true power of the emotion out because it is so much more than a word or painting fermented and impacted by all senses touch aural olfactory chemically mentally culminating in emotionally the first greeting punctuated with a spike in adrenaline etching the moment […]
the security guards play penny poker in the shack i walk through every morning asking me to stay in town instead of heading out next week funny how the ladies get so talkative in the morning and ask a million questions from a face they see for thirty seconds a day incrementally staving off the […]
“Why do you have that look on your face?” “What look?” “The cat that stole the canary look.” “I do not.” “You most certainly do.” “Chainsaw called me on the way in.” “That is never good.” “It most certainly is not.” “So why the satisfied smirk?” “I have never once in my life smirked.” “You […]
it is a toss up which band means more to me, the eels or the flaming lips. both fill me with melancholy sorrow of the sweetest pain always loved this but now it means something more it seems made for you and as it plays on echoing in this hotel a lone tear slips out […]
she looked and his heart raced and stopped in one agonizing moment of dichotomous freezing and burning, he felt like a magician’s assistant being sawed in half, no false limbs though, just ripped in two and flushed with rapturous joy i’m think i’m done writing love odes about the things i want but have no […]
more fun with words with Lauren, she says haiku, i say gesundheit. i’m the only one that laughs. enjoy. ************* pour salt in my woundsI am festering, rottingcan’t let the past go Leave the past for meno need to cry salty tearsyou are worth much more I deserve aloneYou will not bear this cursed crossThis […]
“If he comes closer.” “Into the pot he goes.” “A tasty morsel.” “Sorrow like garlic.” “Eats him.” They think I cannot hear them mutter as I pass. Stupid things in the trees and shadows. I just shrug them off. “Closer. Come closer little human.” “Find a different snack,” I call to them. “He speaks. Does […]
been sitting ready for half an hour coiled and ready to strike the day drinking water and purifying my mind for the trauma about to come another day another disaster waiting in the wings about to face my fears of leaving the nest and falling to my death in a spiralling plummet reserved for the […]
quiet time on the side of the road when i write i hear the voice of the writer boom in the hallways of my mind when i spin in place long enough i can feel the space between thoughts that little moment of doubt a cask of wine floating in wispy seas of nothing rocking […]
sinking the world seems made of quicksand and i am slowly drowning not so slowly no way to survive this slow race to inescapable doom sinking so slowly at my first it was barely perceivable the heaviness of the weights around my ankles as i deep dive to marianas trench of depression newtonian liquids that […]
last year in a very bad place of the world crumbling and reforming and falling apart bully helped get me through in an effort to be less a writer of shitty poetry and more a real person i’m want to take you with me musically on occasion this came on in the car this morning […]
i dreamt of you last night even unaware in sleep you fill my mind it seems it was cold far colder than kentucky or texas and i was wearing a hoodie and jeans which struck me as odd because it was too cold for such a light jacket and i don’t own denim and i […]
“—” “Good morning to you too.” “—” “It has been a week. You can’t still possibly be mad at me.” “—” “I said I was sorry. I made a mistake.” “You had sex with Judy.” “She speaks.” “You are an asshole.” “I am.” “Why did you have to have sex with Judy?” “It is complicated.” […]
i’ve got a request for you my one and only desire be my arsonist and i’ll be your fire i don’t care about what comes after we’ll torch the whole thing from floor to the rafter set me aflame with all your passion and desire be my arsonist and i’ll be your fire let me […]
the always awesome Lauren and I played with haiku today and it was fun and turned out pretty good. ************* echoes of your voicesing of amorous passionred fire in my ears can you feel my needechoing through the aethermy strained voice calling Coming in faintlyA whisper above the windA dark angel’s hymn flecks of spit […]
the devil on my shoulder is feeling psychotic this morning jumping up and down he keeps jabbing me in the neck with his pitchfork screaming profanity in my ear little things like wouldn’t that look great on fire hit the gas run the red light plow into the back of that van get a bottle […]
she said loving me was like being caught in a tornado, struggling to find the calm in the center but also like being flayed by a thousand knives the image caught me and i recognized the truth in her words, the solemn beauty of truth spoken like a razor blade against the wrist, knowing to […]
complicit iliicit reticent abundant flame retardant incontinent marginal decreed self serving subservient denial rejection retention injection infection inflection insidious acclimations of endowed virtue like the first summer breeze or the last week winter snow avalanches of devotion and fair weather frenzies of donning masks from the sacrificial after glow rebirth girth deified refried torn asunder […]
the crowing of a rooster woke me it can’t be dawn yet but time works different down here i look through the window and see the skeletal beast staring back at me the cavern my home lies in is pitch black except for the occasional flood of lava those are the good days the hordes […]
woke up with a hollow feeling in my chest knowing nothing was ever going to work out how i hoped no love, no life, no hidden secrets mine for the taking and i drove to work with heavy heart and pounding skull hard hat more appropriate chest attire than empty head and as i drove […]
“Good morning sleepy head.” “Argh.” “Bad night?” “Rargh.” “Too much drinky drinky?” “Meh.” “I love our morning chats.” “Bleh.” “Go get coffee. Leave the caveman in the break room.” “Sazzafrazz. Rogga.” “Yes please. Hazelnut creamer if there is any left.” “Rah.” “No. I already ate. Thanks though.” “Bleh.” I’m not quite the morning person I […]
she smiled at me and took my order, her blue eyes and tight frame in the short shorts and too tight t-shirt balancing out the long blonde hair and all too kissable lips her accent singing with kentucky sweetness as she smiled and reached up and softly turned my earring, lamenting how it had gotten […]
she stands still and perfect like an angel my heart shatters at the mere view of her of beauty and grace with no parallel i would approach but my heart isn’t pure she embodies all of my deep desire and my longings i’ve always kept hidden her gaze that of ice and uncut sapphire cause […]
across the ocean of shimmering waves far from all land where everything is blue deep below the surface lie unmarked graves of sailors and pirates fate has run through lead by the north star, it always is true with faint chance of escaping their own past they band together and form up a crew pinning […]
i see them walking to their car holding hands and smiling they seem like the perfect couple, so very in love, a dream to behold i hear them at night screaming at each other another piece of glass shattering on the wall above me the passion turns to hate when the eyes are off of […]
can you imagine the sheer chance of crawling out of the seas developing into land based creatures sealing gills stumbling about waiting generations to stop groping blindly slowly gaining the skills to become the dominant species centuries of mistakes and refining skills and for what to mumble in made up words kill in the name […]
if i had a nickel for everytime i checked the phone in hopes of a text or missed call i would swim through them like a scottish cartoon duck for everytime i set the phone down and picked it right back up knowing it didn’t beep but hopeful i just didn’t hear it if i […]
absent adoration beguiling benevolence cathartic cravings defying devotion erasing edifices feeling falsehoods gratifying graciousness half hearted innocent idiocy jaundiced joy kindly knowledgeable languish longingly melancholy meanderings naive nuances opulent offerings perfect perusings quaint quandries restless remorse subtle suffering tense turmoil urgent undulations vague vastness wasted words xenial xenophobes yielding youthful zygomorphic zealots alienated by craven […]
i am an amateur astronomer, studying the tidal affects of ever growing hunger and insatiable gravitational pull on light waveforms caused by black holes in the darkest reach of space i am cheating though, watching in the bathroom mirror, witness to this dark birth in the pupils of the eyes that stare back, all of […]
“I’ve decided something Mona.” “What?” “I don’t believe in love.” “What do you mean?” “I think it is fake. A sham. Created by man to control the populace. Like the Bible.” “Whoa. Like the Bible.” “Yeah. It is all mind control.” “So love and the Bible are fake.” “Exactly.” “What brought this on?” “Which one?” […]
spent the last two hours with my heart racing as i tried to convince myself i needed to fall asleep at least get a nap in i don’t know what had my mind incapable of shutting the fuck up i dozed on off more off than on brief respites i am convinced out there somewhere […]
can you hear me calling out your sweet name the desperate pleas of a man insane standing alone face upturned in the rain cheeks flushed crimson, a curtain of pure shame just a shell of a man taking the blame do you look out your window in disdain ignoring the soft cries choking with pain […]
she sat pensively, i knew the moment i saw her that i would do anything for her if she would ask it, the sun didn’t shine upon her but framed her exquisiteness, and all the words in my head fell onto the floor with my jaw, my heart skipped three of four beats when she […]
it’s deathly silent the only sound as i lay back on the picnic table is my fingers tapping the screen my heart beating in my head beating me into civility how the mind slips and slides down muddy paths next to the creek of slow moving emotional sludge a reservoir of unrequited wonder the tall […]
i went to an open mic poetry reading last night sat hunched down in the back listening to everyone spill their pain and positivity a lady sat next to me and saw my face go through the motions of emotions i had stumbled in while on a walk with no intent to read my inner […]
Mike's Manic Word Depot 