an offset deviation muddying the results of my triangulation seeking the bubblegum heart in this fetid city of off colored rancorous silences it seems that no matter how hard i kick my legs the swingset is incapable of pushing past the zenith beginning the fabled death spiral that plagues my dreams somewhere out there a […]

i slept in fits tiny islands of peace in a sea of chaos the words churning whispering begging not to be forgotten so i cling to this half awake feeling of dizzy dread listening as the coffee drips standing with a butterfly net trying to rescus the words before they burn out before i too […]

i have made a career out of tiptoeing in between the drops of rain careful to leave everything undisturbed i shimmer viridescent in oscillating pinwheels refracting the light making it bend around me the secret to a good illusion is to never really exist in the first place no one cares when you disappear and […]

she is a contradiction in condescending descent off the rails, calling out for any and every set of eyes to bare witness to a tragedy of half truth playing out in double time irredeemable detritus the ring of filth floating recycled vendettas wrapped in abhorrent design bereft of basic kindness banality in broken verse crying […]

suffocated by the falling blossoms, the lilac perfume ensnares the sinus, building pressure behind empty eyes, an allergenic catastrophe in lavender hued dissidence limbs weighted down with yellowed pollen, a swollen faced fool playing bumblebee, defying physics to float on the summer winds of molten rage towards restless dismay the church bells ring out over […]

an angry crow sat on the neighbor’s car cawing loudly at four this morning the neighbor’s car right outside my bedroom window i glanced through the blinds into the darkness blanketing the world outside to see the shadow of the beaked beacon pecking at the hood between wailing admonishments of fury the thought that this […]

the light over the eastern wall once a beacon now a malaise of over saturation in which all shades fade into a wheezing gray devoid of definition there is a pressure to the stillness as dawn spills over the floodgates release an ever encroaching wave of desolation i am deafened by this silent reproachfulness blinded […]

i told her the sun sets in the west so it can selfishly spend its last waking moments shining upon her i have never been so jealous of that baleful orb as when it is night here yet she is framed in the dying rays so i stayed awake until that cheeky bastard rose lazily […]

i handfeed the bite that frees me, freely biting the hand that bleeds me, confused or concussed, indistinguishable from various contusions from variable beatings brought on by familiar familial phalanges, brandishing the mental scars from one too many one too manys a famished fool flailing frantically, feigning fatalistic flaws forgoing forging forgiveness for finding fleeting […]

the watercolors run over empty streets to pool in overflowing gutters carrying bits of distortion in sheer black and white across the broken smile of a fool in half bloom . an uninvited guest wrecking reckless rejoinders overstaying his welcome staining the pristine sheets of happily ever afters unfulfilled a rorscharch inkblot of joy torn […]

i am a series of learned behaviors somewhat at odds with one another. having become pliable and silent to appease the hands that swing the metal hanger trained to disappear into the smoke hanging over the overfull crystal ashtrays at five foot intervals a magician’s assistant taking on other’s pain turning it into my own […]

i occupy my timepicking apart thedistraction piecesfalling into thegaps between atomsalternating chargeto suit the polarityreeking havoc onmy tenderly awkwardinsubstantiabilitiesspitting poisonousclouds only to thencurse the fog in mythoughtless indecisiontearing everything tojagged reminders thatpierce my barefeet asi leave a bloody trailto wherever the windspush my hollow dreamstaticpolluting the airwaveswith abstract declarationsunable to form the wordssinking in the […]

she stares with watery eyes a stern look of disapproval in that half dead glare i nod and smile she scowls unimpressed by the barely mobile ape in vans everyday it is exactly the same she watches me as i watch her then i drive away and she finds a new object to silently despise […]

the sparrows sat staring at me as if confused by my sudden reappearance i smiled from the couch as i stirred the first of many cups of coffee and told them all about the trip north they seemed curious being nonmigratory the concept of going anywhere but here is an exotic image new destinations and […]

everything feels granular as if time is just an echo transitionary in frantic gulps i tear holes through reality with gnarled hands and sheer spite spitting venom into the fresh hells brought forth by self defeat if everyone is the hero in their own tale yet i villify myself does that mean that maybe somewhere […]

the central airin this fleabitehotel on the ass endof oklahoma cityroars like ajet engine as iseek the temperaturethat minimizes thenecessity to listento being able tofind a few momentssleep before the wallsrattle as it kicks ontossing and turningthe sound of dishesreplaces my sparrowsthe television noisebleeds through thewalls and i want to scream i should be packedsipping […]

the ceiling of the hotel was not as accommodating as the one at home it seemed to find my anxiety to be too much to listen to so after a fitful night of worrying i skipped breakfast raced to meet the moving truck at eight o’clock sharp now at nine i find myself yawning with […]

the world is dead except for the thunderous air condition in the hotel room no birdsong trills over the concrete wasteland that is the view of the city afforded by the days inn at the back end of oklahoma city oklahoma there is a mattress in the stairwell that was there when i checked in […]

the moon makes us translucent the sun reflects our fears the stars are naught but astronauts desperate to come home the clouds let lazy fingers drift across the barren land a storm far enough away that it appears like silk dragged along the brush covered plain the buildings on the side of the highway have […]

everything feels so circular as i struggle to find the point my headache infiltrated my dreams leaving a sense of restlessness to the last six hours of wasted pseudo-death failing at sleep i cut my finger as the knife slipped through the rind of the watermelon spilled a cup of serendipitous brown and the neighbor’s […]

angelic tears drown the petty hells in which man toils endlessly an effervescent incidental acrimony free falling inevitabilities of indecent insecurities languishing in the lamentations of earthly desires all roads to hell are paved with misperceived inequalities the soft flesh of innocence lacerated by the stinging barb of ruthless truth i burn away the angelic […]

anxietybipolarityand adhdmake waitingfor literallyanythinga thousand hellsof false hopesof false alarmsof false beliefswarring at onceevery wordunspokenbecomes a newcoffin nailevery wordspokenanother pathto tormenttime has gonesyrupywith ebbsthat teeter onproposterouseschewingpre for prowith maniacalshifts that dizzya fool droppingdramaminein fits ofslow motionandrogynoussorrowful terror dying aloneis a giftbeing aloneis a cursebut some of usare markedfrom the fearfulburst fromthe wombto the reminiscentsilence ofthe […]

been panhandling nickel philosophies seeking to define the meaninglessness of that curious fish skittering onto land wheezing as the weight of existence crushes lungs attached to gill questioning the silence expecting illumination then creating a mythos to keep the unbearable truth hidden in parable scribblng dissertations to confuse and confound the less intelligent forming a […]

i find myselfroaming througha hospitallost and seekingaasistancebut the securityare flirtingwith the nursesthe receptionistseems to beat the verge ofa breakdownand everyone elsehas me walkingin circles there is ashoddiness tothe whole ordeala faith inthe system breakinginto even worsedisrepair anddisinterest i wonder whenthe third worldcountriesthe populacelooks down uponwill beginto feel sorryfor our sadstate of affairs roaming amongthe sick […]

occasionally as i sit listening to sparrows sipping coffee spacing out trying to find the strength to face a faceless wednesday my right nostril decides that simulated drowning is the best way to fully wake the chalky protein powder in the coffee leaves subtly simmering auguries the constant drip drip drip of sinal insanity the […]

there was a stench not a scent nor an odor but a heavy pervasive pungency to the air as i walked to my first call i heard a grunting turned my head and saw a man squatting and staring directly at me taking a shit in the grass between two buildings in downtown dallas we […]

oscillating between clusters and migraines at a rate where the briefest seconds of relief are fool’s gold a promise unfulfilled stressing myself out through clenched teeth and anxious melodies my heart beat taps out an ever increasing sequence of gasping manic hissing as the steam is released in bloody couplets unleashing a spray of inchoate […]

my tender feels brittle my patience worn down to a monomolecular edge waking every hour on the hour anxiety blossoms as i cling to the wispy memory of events that never occured reliving these frozen moments relishing each second using them as a crucifix to keep reality at bay ny solid is as hollow as […]

i woke and that is when it all began to fall apart prior to the waking things seemed to be going as planned but then unfortunately my eyes opened since that irreversible instant it has been a morning filled to the brim with regret coffee my trusted escape has failed me the pressure behind hazel […]

the room is filled with tremulous beams of ensnared moonlight outside the day has broken and the sun sizzles like the yolk of a fried egg oozing over everything in a heated haze of irrefutable malaise the pressure internal has muted colors and the sounds are broken into burst of white noise that carves itself […]

sitting at a red light the music up too loud the city outside sweltering and moving in slow drip a dove flies towards me the wind blowing against it seeming to move twice the speed for half of the distance i couldn’t quite figure out if the glitches in the simulation were growing worse by […]

i watched her through the peephole as she knocked on the door there was no reason for her to be outside a doorway that she had chosen to exit for the final time years before she waited with her ear turned hoping to hear signs of movement and then i watched as she slinked over […]

went negative by a nickel and that began a spiral that ended up at seventy dollars in the hole in the fifteen minutes between getting paid and transferring the funds five cents took me from groceries to staring out into another insurmountable crisis of scraping by the bloody fingernails in the prison walls the only […]

the yellow diffusion drifting in through the cracked blinds fills the room with a sense of foreboding in golden rays that seem to only highlight the motes of dust floating as stagnation hangs heavily over everything the coffee drips sludge to work free the arterial blockage static bursts play in the lavender bursts that rattle […]

the sounds of wet tentacles slapping against the windows of the car as i try and navigate this new instance of hell on earth where the sky bleeds on the cracked carapaces of a billion dead cicadas and bloated copperheads my eyelids feel chitinous as they scrape across a duality in unnatural bipolarity

a crack runs across the wall every time i see it i swear that it has gotten noticably bigger as a kid my dad would yell to stop fingering at the crack which became incrementally more hilarious the older i got the wider that it grew the less anyone else seemed to notice as if […]

i saw where someone had abbreviatied unfortunately to unfortch and any bit of remaining hope for all of humanity died inside me i am convinced humanity is a placeholder until a truly deserving dominant species saves the day.

there is an odd juxtaposition in a fool that loves to sit people watching but cannot stand to look into the mirror in the morning as he gets himself somewhat ready to face a day yet cannot seem to face the face of obtuse ugliness awkwardly stapled to broken bone pitted with scars that stares […]

she strains her self perceived perfection perched upon her shoulders a modern day atlas of inconsistent rambling lies pluck one thread to watch her persona fall apart as the tall tales told as reverential epiphanies scatter in the gales of discombobulated false realities an inherently flawed marble statue carved in conflicting styles to try and […]

he has a routine coffee as the sun rises with a chorus of sparrows that share news of the day before a long shower where the water beats across sorenesses undefined melting down the lump perpetually sitting at the back of his throat as sorrows unrefined tickle his battered tender places hidden among smile lines […]

i drifted aimlessly all morning walking streets i havent seen in so long that i have lost track if they ever really existed at all maybe it is a case of having forgotten what the back of my hand looks like but i could swear somewhere underneath a life of accumulated scarring there was once […]

in this destitution of self induced lamentations craterous shaped by unbending wisps of sacramental rejections reflections bathed in insidious refractions a blind prism an open prison an incision bereft of precision carving the scartissue heartshimmer a fictional recounting of frictional anxieties mounting it is all falling down my fiddle sits unstrung as the fire rains […]

i feel as if i have become a dimestore schopenhauer but then i have to question if my own interpretation is just the ideals placed forth through plurality a studiously flawed summary of external stimuli enforced by the chemicals feeding the will but his focus on the minimalization stripping bare all the trappjngs of an […]

the roads are slick everyone is going too fast to try and start off this long weekend early ie just whip between the red lights flashing in a hurry to get absolutely no where speeding head long into a three day period of mourning trapped inside my cavernous empty skull writing words that go unread […]

i leaned forwardran my tonguealong the sinuousedge of the abyssand for a momentit was your lipsthat flooded my senses

she broke my ribs to fashion a more fitting cage for a flighty dreamwoven heart she broke my spirit to create a pliable devoted slave eradicating the things she said she loved most and like the silence that watches in eternal boredom i watched as all i was was all forgotten as she gazed upon […]

undiagnosed mania obsessive compulsive irrational actions that feeling if things are not done exactly the right way the entire world willfully falls apart into scattered shards where order and chaos sixty nine into sheer oblivion the universe doesn’t remotely give a shit about stressed out apes playing god to fill the vacuum where deities have […]

checked most of my emotional baggage at the kiosk except for the scars that carry on into the day to day routine a quarter smile more than the day deserves plastered over a mask of utter indifferences secirity eyes me the fake grin and shaved head and total inability to hide what i feel from […]

every line punctuated by myopic misunderstanding every reflection painted in dysmorphic irregularities my mind is stuck in neutral as the world spins ever on the only certainty is bathed in uncertainty as i seek to capture sunlight with a butterfly net to top off mason jars filled with dreampollen triggering a sinus infection cerebral deflection […]

i find that i irrationally dislike things colors intersections people buildings and the hair on the back of my neck stands the lizard brain reacts instantly i back away i find that i unintentionally love things vistas smells memories scars when the hair on the back of my neck stands and i choke down the […]

the world outside as hollow as my insides the sick echo of emptiness strains the frayed heartstrings of the most foolish of them all so i slink back down into the dark tired and sore striking matches never seeing a spark living alone in a vacuum gasping for something more as my tears make technicolor […]

the fiction screams as the poetry purrs my mind a cacophony of needy prose she sits smiling serenely on a throne in the eye of ny storm my nirvana calling soft to always show me how to come home

i stood on the bridgea cup of cocoasteaming in my handas the sun burstthrough the hoarfrostcoating the branchshanging overthe flash frozenriver of filthy ice as i stood watchingmy breath coalecsein the frigid airi noticed a figurestumbling slightlyin high heels acrossthe sheet of icei blinked my eyesthinking the lightwas playing a trick but there she wasstanding […]

absurdity is the lens in which we are able to laugh at the hopelessness that smothers each agonized moment of existence

an inherited silence fills the room as i strum the strings of a ukulele i never learned to play convincing myself these rampant urges to end this murky facade are just a phase the depression multiplying the headache and the premise of keeping on keeping on feels as hollow as the now broken ukulele softly […]

maybe wearing a shirt with camus on it as my head tries its damnedest to kill me as weak sunlight filters through the blinders strapped to my ugly face sipping bitter coffee that reflects my mood far more efficiently than terrible verse could hope to summate was a poor choice but i woke up strapped […]

he cannot see why these wings he has fashioned for rusted iron and broken concrete will not carry me closer to the sun the physics are tricky this close to the heart of a dying almost star concave shadows dart in the corners of landlocked hazel lies disguised as wise as maggoty lips decry innocence […]

life is a series of unrestful naps broken up by exterior stresses a constant cycle of waking up unprepared for the fresh batch of horrors floating just outside life is an expectation that despite all of the empirical data that suggests it is mostly slowly rotting by working hard for someone else’s interests that there […]

i collect every tear shed in a crystal decanter as i long for something more than the nothing that is my existence one day you can quench your thirst imbibe upon my sorrow which feels like all i have to offer a world that has forgotten i have not expired yet

a lone bird calls out to the rising sun a bottle shatters loud as the tentative fingers of light carve away the night for a moment the affection drawn upon the cratered moon is palpable the dead satellite shines with stolen light and i smile understanding far too well exhibiting beauty reflected from an external […]

lost in the silence before the rest of the world has woken lost in the thoughts defining the twilight of humanity’s fall i can do nothing to disrupt the mute orchestra as fingers strum along tightly strung ligaments a soundless cacophony between palpations of every dream left to rot in the fetid dumpster of predestined […]

i occupy the witching hour my eyes open at three o’clock the dark whispers caress the folds of my scarred indignities it is the time when every doubt becomes too much to possibly sleep through my shoulders ache and my hands are pins and needles from clutching awkwardly at the surrogate pillow i occupy the […]

i watched a sheep dog lazily wander nipping at the tails of vagrant sheep keeping the flock tended as the wind swept across the tall grass a wave washing over verdant seas the sun beating down merciless intent blurring the emptiness an illusionary diversion a cop car on the side of the highway a sea […]

you don’t know what is truly essential until you have nothing at all i can scrape by with a bag of rice for weeks a pack of ramen every other day no internet the air turned up to eighty-five all day spent thirsty hungry growing desperate knowing that it is weeks until it gets caught […]

at what point is it safe to give up on a dream to relinquish hope aceepting there is no silver lining just toxic rain coming to melt the failing flesh from brittle bone? how far negative can one descend before the unhappy realization that it is never as bad as it will become the shrinking […]

i sat watching the sea at the edge of a cliff as the sun rose angrily vertiginous as thoughts of falling tumbling ever down teased me dreaming of taking to the currents like a tortoise sinking slow i sat watching the sky as the sea ate away at the cliff and stars fell agoraphobic at […]

she was an extortionist using me as and emotional contortionist twisting myself into the always shifting shape of the space in her chest i was her lover poet punching bag excuse she was only ever happy when my tongue wagged obediently between her legs or the words lapped between her ribs but oh how i […]

the rats watch at the edge of the alleyway unblinking eyes following every flash of motion i sit waiting for a burst of willingness to step out into the heat already dreading the walk downtown beneath the solemn concrete edification signalling humanity’s lack of wellbeing pigeons hop unashamedly begging for whatever scraps will be dropped […]

i have gone on record detailing the plethora of flaws faults and shortcomings that have always led to the fool discarded tossed aside by the ones that promised to never go maybe it is an error of physics this inverse magnetism the secret power to repel to repeal to render love null perhaps it is […]

another father’s day spent wondering if you knew how much you shaped me into whatever it is i have become every other weekend trying to live up to the example that you set just without the alcohol enhancement i have kept your tradition alive of crushing hugs and small things that show how much they […]

she told me how she wanted to be a poet i smiled not understanding the confession well just fucking write poetry was my only response she looked at me shocked wondering if it is really that easy i shrugged worst case it is garbage best case it connects with someone it isn’t as if there […]

the day is too quiet a miasma hangs overhead the silence lingers heavy becoming fear of newfound deafness colors muted a haze of gray malaise drips sullenly down streaked filthy glass showcasing an shallowness of inverted hue resounding in dull need i strip my leathery flesh watching as blackened blood thick with blowfly larva a […]

god doesnt think that i exist she is agnostic to my presence a blindspot when she looks down on the insipid mess that is creation hurling stones at glass houses because there is nothing else to do until the inevitable end that slowly crawls for us all as she sits silent headphones on listening to […]

i inhabit the liminal space between frozen moment and sheer adrenalized panic attack absolute solitude and too many eyes i am the alpha and omega of desire turned hatred a comfortable hilt on a broken sword the instant between incomparable pleasure and unfathomable pain i am the threshold the keeper of the seals separating the […]

darkness encroaches be it my vision finally failing me or whatver lurks just beyond the last vestige of sputtering light i cannot quite tell every hair has stood on end for as long as i can remember since the moment i woke if waking is what occured there is no way to tell as my […]

reading theories on which freezes faster boiling or cold water some of the greatest thinkers through time claiming hot water freezes quicker than cool water in defiance of newton’s law it is utterly less than meaningless but i can’t shake this headache and my mind won’t quiet i need a distraction something to provoke a […]