I am standing in the midst of a blizzard of playing cards. they fly about slicing into me and it is all I can do to protect my eyes. it is in slow motion and I watch every single one fly at me. an ace of spades nearly removes my left ear.

the suit of hearts is missing.

clubs, diamonds and spades pummel and shred. 

I lower my hands and let them take me. the house of cards has fallen apart. and I am done. 

done spitting words of hope and love. 

gonna save up the words. no point wasting them. I have no prospects. need a job. need so much. 

and none of it is available.

I am lost. not sure what I am going to do. at all. this is horrible. horrific. 

i will not play the fiddle as it burns. see myself more on turntables spinning a funky dirge.

fuck me. this is now the lowest I have been. and that says something. 

almost is the shittiest thing in the world.