i don’t understand the phrase under the weather

i am always under the weather

or part of it

but today i am officially under it

i tried to deny it

to ignore it

just keep moving and it will vanish

like debt and stress

i assume that is how it all works

i probably got high and skipped the days in school that actually taught useful life lessons and such

at least i assume i skipped those days

because the advanced algebra and trig have zero impact so far

while it is amusing to know philosophy and history on my day to day it has been reduced to less than needed

unless i get swept away to some running man like game show where this useless inowledge is the thing that separates me and death

which seems doubtful at this point

i don’t suspect any manner of training will allow me to survive the hail of bullets

even if i can find the hypotenuse

which i may or may not be able to do

instead i am under the weather and hating most everything

just really run down feeling and in need of sleep within ten minutes of waking

this too shall pass

or it is fatal

one of the two for sure

so as i stand in the middle of the ghetto and compose another shitty poem while waiting for my guide

ignoring the stares

sick

in the bunny suit with a facemask on and miserable

but they seem worse off around me so i shouldn’t complain

but i am anyway

because i can

i’m sick dammit

i need cuddles and vitamin c

now

instead i am working

wishing i were there