it started with a broken wine glass

snapped at the stem

no

let me start over

it started to end with a broken wine glass

snapped at the stem

no

it was the end of the beginning that started with a broken wine glass

snapped at the stem

the delicate glass cracked in my calloused hand

wine falling onto my lap

the notes of cedar and citrus and peat dancing across my crotch

it wasn’t the beginning of the end

that has a different sour taste

but it was decidedly the end of the beginning

as plain as the horrified looks as i bellowed fuck

the tapestry showed it’s first snagged thread

if you can imagine the beginning as an intense and beautiful panic stricken ride

the snapped stem marked the end of the joy ride

soon the fun was muted like the colors of a faded photo

you could still make them out

but the vibrancy was gone

the memory lingered

but it was no longer fresh

the end of the beginning

it would be some time before the beginning of the end still

that steadfast era of color leeching slowly out but the remnants still held a certain allure

sweet words still muttered but the tinge of sarcasm took seed

it had gone from can’t get enough to having just about enough

the tipping point wasn’t met

but it was coming

no

it was not a start

but something started to stop and that stop signalled the end of the beginning

with a snapped stem

it’s funny

not funny funny

but sadly funny how that one moment triggered what would be an avalanche

not an avalanche

the slow erosion of a once strong foundation

how the crack in the facade began to show with the snapped stem

before then

it seemed like it would be forever

after that the soil shifted just enough

it wasn’t the beginning of the end even though it kind of was

but it started then

it seems so clear now that the then is then and the now is clear

i’ve grown afraid of new beginnings because my mind likes the little details and the little details expose the bigger issues

too smart for my own stupidity

too strong to not snap the stem

now after the end and thinking of the end of the beginning

i blame myself because it would be easier to blame someone else and i don’t sleep well enough as it is so blaming me is more beneficial than blaming some other innocent party

not that i’m innocent

no

not me

it wasn’t the first stem snapped

probably won’t be the last

but i would like to avoid the ending of a beautiful beginning

but the only way i know how is to avoid new beginnings

a möbius strip prison

one sided and infinite