An Interview with Cerberus by Uncle Spanky

Hey there boys and girls and all points in between. Been a while since I did an interview, but I got excited when I heard about a new collective, Cerberus. One of the members, Chris Miller (author of Dust, available now) reached out and asked if I would be interested in talking to them about their new book, Cerberus Rising: Nine Novelettes. When I heard he had teamed up with Patrick C Harrison (who just released Visceral with the brilliant Christine Morgan) for this book I got super excited and immediately said yes.

To my chagrin, I found out M Ennenbach was also in the group, but it was too late to cancel.

I did it anyway. This is it.

Chris and Patrick, a pleasure to finally meet the two of you. I’m a big fan.

C- Thanks for having us.

P- Da Ding Dang Doo

Was that English?

C- Patrick is from Greenville.

P- *unintelligible syrupy noises

M- are you going to pretend I’m not here?

And we have “poet” and “author” M Ennenbach, “author” of Hindrance to Good Writing and the soon to be released (un)peppered. Ugh.

M- you see him doing air quotes, right?

P- flim flam dangety ding

C- *screen stutters …it is a true pleasure to be here…

Well Chris seems to have a bad connection and I’m not sure if Patrick is having a stroke or not. How did you manage to sucker two up and coming kings of literature to include you?

M- we all live relatively close to one another…

Pity? It’s pity, right? Maybe they get a kickback from the government for including you? Have they read any of your “works”?

M- you’re doing the air quotes again! Every fucking time. I told them you would be an asshole. But Chris will do literally anything to sell books.

C- …love your blo…blo…blog…

P- *scowls knowingly

M- we became friends through Facebook. Met up. Clicked. Decided to write together. We have a book. Three themes, one from each of us. Nine novelettes total.

C- …was watching Dark Tow…

So six epic tales. Fantastic.

C- w-w-w-we met on Facebook…

M- *petulantly Nine epic tales.

P- Didgeridoo

Did he just say Didgeridoo? So you each took a stab at the three themes. I see they are, Chaos from Chris, Letters from Patrick, and How to ingratiate yourself into a group of people with actual talent? Oh! And Christine Morgan did the foreword! I’m assuming you lied and said it was for Make A Wish?

M- *whining Cabin Fever. My theme was Cabin Fever. And yes, Christine did the foreword for us. She is amazing. It is truly an honor to have her included.

P- skibbity bang, frizzle titties

You guys heard him say titties, right? Am I losing my mind or am I starting to understand his language?

M- he said it was great time writing together.

You understand that?

M- meh.

C- three themes. Nine novelettes.

I’m starting to see why they let you in the group.

M- Chris has to hand crank the internet in Winnsboro. They have one tower and if a steer stands in just the right spot it is spotty at best.

C- Morgan does the foreword…

P- *scowls in agreement

So, Cerberus Rising is coming soon. And I see Patrick has his Splatter Western, A Savant Bread, coming in September. You three have been busy. Drabbles of Dread, ABCs of Terror, Dust and Hindrance. Visceral. (un)peppered.

M- *annoyingly Hunger on the Chisholm Trail and (un)fettered. Yes. We have been busy

C- Christine is wonderful

P- *glares at cigar in country speak

M- This is collectively a showcase of three writers coming to the top of their game. There is something for every reader. From Cosmic to existential horror. Even a tragedy in the middle.

If you wrote it, tragic is apt. This has turned into a cluster fuck of epic proportions. Go and grab these six sure to be amazing stories and three others. It is out soon from Amazon. Grab their other books as well and be on the lookout for A Saggy Breast in the Splatter Western series in late September and (un)remarkable on August 11th. Anything else before we put this out if it’s misery?

P- Christine Morgan’s Splatter Western will be out soon as well from Death’s Head Press.

C- my theme, Chaos…

Could he do that the entire time?

M- he has moments of clarity.

You are still the worst “poet”.

M- and you are an anthropomorphic piece of dung.

And you are Curly Joe or Shemp in this incarnation of The Three Stooges. Special thanks to the spinning circle that is Chris Miller and East Texas Mush Mouth Harrison the Third. Next time bring Christine.

C- Patrick’s theme is Letters.

Idiots. Cerberus Rising, available in the next few days. Two out of three ain’t bad.

M- still hate you.


P- scowls in farewell

C- Cabin Fever.

3 thoughts on “An Interview with Cerberus by Uncle Spanky

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s