within

i haven’t really slept
for days
not for lack
of trying
not for lack
of need
but the mind was racing
like a stock car driver
in the thrall
of a mighty deathwish
or like

a brokenhearted poet.

as i lay reading
apparently
it caught up to me
my left eye tender
from where the kindle
fell
but didn’t jar
me awake.

then the storms manifested
outside
i only know because
the power began cycling
in time
with the thunder
the fan start stopping
the microwave beeping
in defiance
screaming
to all that would listen
that it was alive

that is was alive

now my old friend
ache
travels leisurely
through my shoulder
stops to slam the doors
within my brain
lady depression
whispers soothingly
to me to sleep
but first
how long has it been
since you considered
every mistake
you ever made
remember that choice

or that one
or that one
or that one

and for the first time
in a while
i feel less me
again

i don’t need
anyone else
just the words
sweet depression
and the storm outside
to match
the intensity
of the one
within

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