there is a
constant vigilance
in remaining
mostly oblivious

when i pay
too close of attention
to mostly anything
i pick apart the pixels
unwittingly exposing
the glimmering code
functioning beneath

if it isn’t questioned
the minor discrepancies
can remain mostly ignored
aberrations not rules

but once seen
nothing can ever truly
be unseen
empirical data
begins to pile up
before a truthnami
swells and scatters
another pristine vista
into a watercolor of
hidden hellish intent

most of the time
i don’t know what
a poem is about
until weeks later
when the protective
biliouslayerof
congealed metaphors
slowly dissolves
because after hitting
post i am already lost
in the words once more

constant vigilance
to maintain my own
plausible deniability
if i dare stop to question
the stream of unconsciousness
it becomes contentious
an all consuming carousel
careening to carve
callous furrows cracking
the carefully crafted
cage of indifference
keeping obsessive ideas
safely tucked away

there is no salvation
when you are the willing
vessel of your own destruction
just brief instances where
you stay one step ahead
of the anxieties racing
across the placid surface
fissures erupting as the
ice plate shatters ahead
fleeting moments of serenity
suddenly scattered as
you scramble for footing
on an ever slickening surface
watching as the shore grows
farther and farther away