i don’t believe in anything any longer

not gods or goddesses, not magic, not miracles, not fate or destiny or predestiny

there is no one there to answer the prayers, the begging, the hopes, the dreams

i want to, i wish there was more to this barrage of elemental destruction, mental disrepair, broken spirit and crushing feelings of hopeless despair

i believe in this headache, it is the constant reminder i still function

all i do anymore, function in my dysfunction, live this unlife, this mirage, the play that is the movements through the currents of existence in three acts

all building up to the anticlimactic final act of wasting away in a pool of my own regrets

this traffic jam of unexplored fears and emotional disconnect

my life, a treatise on depression and thunderous pain, of self inflicted wounds and barely concealed rage

this empty apartment my stage, the roaring silence my patronage, the tears my accompaniment as i glide back and forth, a ghost in my hollow shell, the monster at the end, the villian in my own tale, the strategy a quick demise

i bow to quiet, thank it for encompassing me and breathe deep the bitter scent of dismay and disenchantment

i don’t believe in anything any more except that nothing is my everything

a life in three glorious acts of emptiness