i get
overstimulated
after a
podcast
my insides
are
electrified
my brain
won’t stop
screaming
anxiety’s
(bi)polar
opposite

unintended consequences
in these semi-suicidal
tendencies, running full
force into self-destruction

it is
exhausting
saying the
things
out loud
i only
have to
think
typically.

besides
her
i don’t like
talking
to, well,
everyone.

i go
inside out
or rightside
up
for an hour
it takes
time
to reincorporate
back into
whatever the fuck
this is.

yet
i sip
coffee
and
write
when i
could be
staring
at the ceiling.

unintentionally vibrating
a schism a spasm a sundering
shivering in nothingness,
an abysmal baptism in sorrow