sitting swaying
little more than
a half carved puppet
poked and prodded by
the invisible forces
entangling this
universe of apathetic
insolence while slowly
being smothered in
a net of haphazardly
handwoven lessons
unlearned through
trials by misfired
compulsions causing
an overbearing need
to prove my existence
as i shrink smaller
to dodge the light
a mask of photonic
disambiguations
cinched tightly to
my weathered face of
unsightly horrors

i absorb the radiation
extending this parody
of a half life lived
in the simpering solace
of woeful whimperings
blistered by the
silence saturating
this quantum prison of
quirky quarks in a
sea of crystalline chaos
shedding electrons in
the foolish hope of
finding positivity in
an unbalanced state
hovering between forms
seeking the signal thread
to call catastrophe down
upon this rigidity of
irrepressible longing

i let the anxieties
bathe my filthy flesh
a pummeling of pervasive
electrical outbursts
in lavender splashes
to overload the grid
a disconnection in
burnt out traces as
plumes of smoke from
the key components slowly
fills my skull with smog
obscuring everything
except her cheshire grin
etched in my mitochondria
as i sputter fitfully
into cyclical relapse
as the pulses ravage
savagely in search of
the quickest route home