leaving september lesser than again

i leave september
buried deeply down
nestled in the ache
permeating my chest
the fallow reminder
of being put aside
the festive rotting
of autumn signaling
a new beginning as
it germinates in
the corpseridden
heartsoil soaked with
desperate tears shed
for the things left
unacknowledged by
eyes that only know
how to gaze inwardly
leaving adorations
to fertilize the
shallow depths with
puerile discharges
in electrical æther

i leave september
the same way i left
spetember last year
with nothing but
false hopes and the
new scars gained by
foolishly pursuing
the same dead dream
and even the sparrows
don’t listen to a
broken old fool who
is too stupid to quit
even when it is clear
i am the only one
still fighting for
something i will most
likely never have
lamenting how i never
actually had a shot
but the lies sounded
so very sweet once upon
a few septembers ago

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