unbearably worthless

slipping
in and out of
dissociation
i have
forgotten how
to form words
with this tongue
i am uncertain
is mine
the heaviness
that accompanies
this depression
pins my form
to the page
a butterfly
frozen in midflap
blue fingertips
tracing the
frost on the window
as the sun refracts
off the snow
the sparrows sing
shiny baubles
half buried in
the drifting
crystals
a pencil scratches
sloppy lines
in escapist fantasy
falling backwards
slipping sideways
unattached to
bitter sorrows
undulating
through my
soul bereft corpse
a hot air balloon
buffeted by the
callous north wind
blue plumes flare
as i deflate
best intentions
a jigsaw puzzle
in a wood chipper
never whole
sawdust delusions
always drifting
in silent reproach
lostlostlost
anxiously aimless
aimlessly anxious
at the edge of
a full mental break
incapable of
making a sound
slipping
in and out of
temporal flux
paperthin in
my insignificance
fluttering lightly
each breath harder
pulling the rusted
barbs in deeper
lostlostlost
in the darkness
of acceptance
unprocessed by
a broken mind
blue fingertips
tracing the grain
in chaotic repose
of frost forming
to glaze over the
window to the soul

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