i knew something
was off the moment
my eyes opened
the pink blush
across the sky
birdsong and the
voices of my neighbors
rang softly into
the murky bedroom

i grabbed my phone
in my frantic panic
of over checking
over thinking
anxietial fireworks
i forgot to set
my fucking alarm

in an instant
i was up and nude
in the shower
brushing my teeth
packing toiletries
grabbing chargers
in the car
pumping gas
getting water
driving a hundred
towards waco while
still half asleep

i have a routine
sit silently and let
the night fade
coffee percolating
poetry brewing
and i tend to finally
come alive as the
birds awaken in
the bushes outside

now i am a guided
missile of panicked
intent flying down
the highway as fireants
nibble my organs and
home becomes a memory
in the rear view mirror