some people crave attention to keep the demons at bay, company to quiet the voices inside their heads, drown the sorrows

me

i just scribble them down, give them free reign, let them scream, gnash at the carpet, smear their filth on the walls

depression frolics, prances about, rearing it’s ugly head and mugging for the camera, demands my attention alone

i play shrinking violet, curl into myself, wait for the quiet between bouts of delirium to cease and resist

the lone solace in this lonely existence is that no one else gets hurt in the fanatically frantic world of uncertain certainty

it isn’t that i cannot handle the abuse, just that in this case it is better to receive than to give, i prefer to give in other ways

feel free, kick me around, i’ve had better from far worse, i’ll spit the blood so it doesn’t choke me, though light choking is fair game

if you need a manic voice of dissention, someone to out crazy your crazy, i don’t mind at all, not many can reach this level of nuts

but don’t worry about me

the best part of depression is it isn’t ever the same for long, i’ll be manic or miserable or a combination of both soon enough

i am far more concerned about you, i love you, i need to know you are okay, i can be quiet for weeks, but you need to be heard