this year began
in destitution
by the third month
my car
was repossessed
my phone
was shut off
and i
sat at the edge
of eviction

my first book
came out
yet the scrabble
of survival
diminished
the joy
instead of feeling
like i had moved forward
it felt like
ten miles in reverse

then the pieces
fell into place
a new job
a new sense of purpose
a new soul
interlocked
into the ragged pieces
of my own
and i began
to breathe again

the spiral
as i circled the drain
was on par
with a black hole
ever hungering
to pull me in
yet i clawed
my way
to nostrils clear
of the surface
of the water

you don’t know
what you have
remaining
until everything else
is taken away
nothing tests
the spirit
as much as barely clinging
to a tuft of grass
as you dangle
from the cliff
overlooking oblivion

another year
of amazing heights
met
with precarious depths
held together
by bubblegum
and good intentions
with new friends
new hopes
new dreams
blanketing
the constant sense
of falling apart

now i stand
a few feet back
from the eroding edge
wondering
if i have the ability
to move forward
while avoiding
the fall
i don’t know
nothing is certain
but the will to fight on
is strong
in the old lion’s chest