halfway

i am
surrounded
[by madmen and suicides]
every word
that screams
off the page
pushes me towards
one of
the only two
options seemingly
available
for a self medicated
poet
with too many
feelings
dragging himself
across the broken glass
signifying
another day
staring out the window
at a world
that is missing
the one thing
that can push me
out the door
that can pull me
from this
cloud of words
simply the promise
of falling
lips first into you

looking for
the meanings in
the ravings
diving too far
from the shore
under the
starlit sorrow of
now slient
suicidal songbirds

the bookshelves
haphazardly
stacked
with these
crimson lined sheets
drenched
in the calcified
cries for help
ignored
by time
or distance
or curious eyes
wanting to know
where this wreckage
next goes
off the rails
to unleash
bursts of decadent
frustration
across the
morning skies over
derelict skyscrapers
left half
constructed
as the dreamsculptor
opens a vein
in a bathtub
halfway between
[heartache and validation]

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