as clear as silt

it feels as if
the parted seas
allowed me to
stagger halfway
nervously venturing
across sucking silt
as the waters
churned mockingly
on either side
just to feel
momentary calm
before slamming
back into place

this isn’t another
one about drowning
we all see through
the clumsy metaphor
it is a call out
to the universe
saying i understand
i saw briefly what
my prison is made of
had a vision of what
normality is like
i have accepted
my miniscule place
in the sickly beating
heart of madness
you have made it clear
in your infinite and
unflinching carelessness
freedom is just
another term used
interchangably with
mass self delusion

given me gills so
that i may breathe
in the rapids of
the indifference of joy
no easy death earned
in the shadow of light

i need no more
reminders or flashes
of false hope
i know my place
trapped in a prism
of infinite sorrow
each glimpse outside
a rusted coffin nail
hammered by passion

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