amateur mapmaker

i have never met
a deadend
i didn’t try
too hard to coax
into a new trail
only to find myself
disjointed and
utterly disappointed
as reality reasserts
itself in tepid disdain

an amateur mapmaker
traversing old scars
i did not inflict
seeking a direct route
through the brambles
leaving a bloody trail
inevitably leading
down roundabouts that
spill my bleached bones
in a pile exactly
where the journey began

red exes on a tattered
sheet of paper clenched
in a white knuckled grip
as i stomp across the
minefields left unmarked
seeking a straight path
through convolutions
a vertiginous compass
and inate desire to find
my way back home once more

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