a kaleidoscope of nothing

barely able to
string together
a series of semi
coherent thoughts
this chilly morn
unprepared for
cheerful humaning
barely conscious
stumbling along
as coffee drips
through my beard
to stain my shirt
in caffeinated
auguries of a
day spent spinning
yet going nowhere
except to get the
necessary items
for the weekend
as the service calls
come flooding and
my head throbs along
with the happy
sparrows watching
as i slowly dress

both of my socks
are left footed
all the rights have
been slowly stripped
away to be lost in
the jumble of my
malformed thoughts
barely able to find
a pair of shoes
as my belt has decided
to vanish like a
natural fiber version
of db cooper with
a stack of cash and
a planeful of willing
hostages hanging on
its every mumbled word

some morning are filled
with happy images as i
scrabble for the words
others are made of the
small cuts i accumulate
throughout the previous
day that surprise me
as i delve into the
routine of self maintenance
only to feel a hundred
burning wounds upon my
bleeding fingers while
staring at the face of
an old tired bastard
with little better to do
then bitch about how
the sun pokes up over
the building amd blinds
the addled mindstate of
lonely fool double knotting
his vans before heading
out to face a world
that barely acknowledges
my fleeting existence
trying not to yawn as
the weight of depression
settles like a yoke
onto my aching shoulders
as i till the fields of
many salted surrenders

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