knotted and undefined

spent half the night
trying to undo
this knot behind
my right eye
a twisted mass of
gnarled old barb wire
i picked up somewhere
west of ranger

coffee brewing as i
plot a path to graham
hoping a little caffeine
can motivate relief
before the next
three hour tour of
meth flecked americana

i roamed the old
town squares reading
tarnished brass plaques
talking with the locals
thick molasses coated
accents cultivated in
lives spent in their
tiny corner of the land
with no desire to leave
a four town radius

it’s the same everywhere
the world is only
as big as you dream it
they are contented in
familiarity with little
reason to go explore
while i drive endlessly
uncertain at times in
a haze of pained wonder
where it is exactly i am

i don’t belong anywhere
a tumbleweed following
the undercurrent of chaos
following blue lines
deeper into confusion
home is just another of
those four letter words
i know the definition of
yet cannot seem to apply

sipping coffee as the
birds have gotten frantic
in time to my pulse
sending twinges of agony
as i try to loosen
the knot behind my eye
before the cycle renews
lost and listless waiting
for the sun to rise again

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