my clumsy fingers
fold the delicate
parchment of my
origami heart into
the shape of an
awkwardly (un)majestic
long necked swan
ever the perfectionist
not content with
my previous attempts
i smooth and straighten
the cardiac sheet
ignoring the creases
from so many prior
failures in folding
until the tattered
tissue paper tears

i dreamt of drawing
when i was a child
but left handed clumsiness
meant little more
than graphite stains
and flawed visuals
from fingers granted
dexterity yet saddled
by lack of talent for
much more than giving
temporary pleasures
or tapping keyboards
turning screwdrivers
and changing small parts

an avid hobbyist
in mediocre origami
trying to make something
beautiful where only
ugliness exists
carefully unfolding
my paper organs
with shaky hands that
tear the creases
leaving me with only
an awkward seties of
(un)majestic little swans
and a pile of the scraps
from a lifetime of
failed artistic endeavors
where none of it ever
turned out as i hoped
and only the flaws
stand out in the end