mountains (age)

a former coworker
was at the same
location yesterday
and as he walked
past me i was asked
if i remembered him

i stared at the
head of silver hair
the gut hanging
over his belt and
could not recognize
the face now
hidden in lines
it had been over
ten years since we
had last been in
the same location
and his eyes lit up
as he remembered me
and my heart sank
as i realized this
hunched old man
was once the same
as the one from
a whole life before

for an hour after
he left i felt as if
shellshocked not only
at his state of
onset disrepair but
at what the same
ravages of time had
surely done to me

there is a part of
me that realizes what
was once yesterday has
faded into yesteryear
but in the day to day
managing of cyclical
insanity the weeks
become months and
years become decades
slipping into one
sludge labeled before
as tomorrows become
less and less of a
guaranteed phenomenon

the smallest mountain
still recalls the
touch of the sky
as it slashed the
endless cerulean above
before erosion and
the blistering elements
made it into more
of a faded vista
lost in the shadows
in interminable silence

i wasn’t all that
much to look at before
now i wonder if i
would recognize myself
if a younger version
glimpsed into this
shittier future life
all that time wasted
chasing dreams i cannot
be certain were mine
just figments lost
to the passage of time

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