happiness: manic in waco

i didn’t eat
the rush of
a forgotten alarm
the drive
an immediate
beginning to
a week that
to be long enough

i don’t feel
but i keep thinking
i haven’t eaten
so it makes me
think possibly
i am hungry
but now it is
late and i don’t
need to drive waco
manic and exhausted
for something
i would really
rather not consume

i hope there
will be oatmeal
at breakfast

there it is
the thought that
will pervade my
manic mind
as sleep eludes
me in intoxicating
delusions of
something i want
but keep at
arm’s length

i am hungry
to crazy to go
spend money
i shouldn’t on
things i can
do without
whining into
the aether because
i am not well
enough to be
an adult most nights

i can fake it
during the day
especially after
a bowl of oatmeal
with brown sugar
and some dried cherries

but not alone
manic in waco needing
i don’t deserve


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