oxymoron

happy endings are oxy morons, endings being inherently melancholy things

even when a tale ends happily it is sad to let go of the world and characters that illicit those happy feelings

bittersweet endings i can see

happy

not so much

and i can’t think of a single ending in my life that was truly happy

not one that wasn’t saturated with a cornucopia of emotion

maybe because i’ve become a walking contraction

a conjunction malfunction

a human haven’t, loaded down by the things i lack, the carrot on the stick i chase, the plethora of have nots abound

maybe i pissed of a witch on one of my gallavants through the haunted forest

ate her candy cottage and used her wand to pick my teeth after

so angered she cursed the entire run of not so bright men i have come to personify in her bulging eyes

a human been, no long being the things that make a fully working model, the entire line retired as newer, better looking and cleaner running units flood the market

a discount bin slightly malformed discontinuation of failure, the life-like latex covering losing the elasticity and drooping exposing faulty wiring and viscosity break down

a pathetic synthetic, derivative of past models from before the true renaissance of molecular reconstruction

da vinci’s vitruvian cro magnon man in a world of muscle bound einsteinian theorems

just a contrived literary device roaming the land in search of a definition

i’m not everyone’s cup of tea, but i am someone’s glass of absinthe

for every nightmare i induce, i can be someone else’s warm and fuzzies

or not

as my servos cease to work and the break downs, emotional and physical take their toll like the coins in charon’s skeletal grip

the waters of the river lethe scrubbing the hard drive clean

no happy ending in sight

just a limping contradiction trying to fill the emptiness between thought and dream with a solid foundation of sand

maybe i am the oxygenated moron in a world of oxymorons

happy endings, military intelligence, now then, old news, on and on it goes where it stops

i don’t know

but it won’t be happy when it does

i’m sure of it

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