Written by m ennenbach

she is, i am, and this is

she is a bolt of lightning that courses through my every thought, from the moment i wake up to when i stare at the walls halfway through the night

the personification of dream, of desire, of hope, of love, distilled and made whole

she is the dull ache, the sudden rush of adrenalized creation, like a shot of morphine on a weary soul, allowing the pain to fade enough to continue on

she is understanding in a world that can’t, laughter in a time of sorrow, inspiration in a time of need

she is the first piercing light after the storm, the storm itself, yet peace, a promise it will end, and when it does her light will evaporate the rain

i am the coarse clap of thunder, shaking the earth and frightening the beasts, the promise of violent winds and incremental pain, the shiver of fear and the moment of truth

the personification of dread, of depression, of hopelessness, of remorse, forged in the crucible of time

i am the throbbing discontent, the sarcasm of a world of hurt, tears in a time of laughter

i am the sullen rage, the lethargic will of give up and quit, laconic listlessness in a time of bitter need

i am the approaching storm, the sudden darkening skies, the chill wind, the lack of light, an eclipse on a clear day of ill tidings and forboding

but she makes me feel like i could be more, or less of a blight, someone who can approach the light and not be burned, no scorn or malice in her tender gaze

and for her, i seek to be these things, though every instinct screams i’ll fail, she give me the incentive to try anyway, to stand tall and breathe life into a shadow realm of half lived nightmare

for her i would crush the walls so carefully built, let the healing rains sweep across my broken body, dare to dream of hope and the salvation i have so angrily scorned

for she is, and i am, and this is not a declaration of love, a foolhardy ode cast into the aether, no this is a different kind of declaration altogether, this is a promise, a silent wish, a murmured prayer

for she is, and i am, and all this is her’s

27 thoughts on “she is, i am, and this is”

  1. I feel like I miss you very much after reading those
    You know,
    This brings to mind that I think I’m exceptional at putting some feelings aside or smothering them to near death in order to live without being burdensome or tiring and to function. I wonder when that started? Birth? After the first burning? As an adult? Hell if I know.
    Anyhow 😘 thanks for the memory 😉

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  4. I think it’s one of the prettiest things I’ve ever read.
    It’s also incredibly vulnerable. A thing you are wonderful at. In writing of course. This is deeply heartfelt. ❤️
    That wasn’t it. Lol. But it’s todays thoughts

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  7. And… this is one of my favorites ever. I adore this. It’s magnificent and gentle, torrid and serene. The contrasts are perfect. Opposite and yet perfect puzzle pieces. Oh how I love this.

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