i had finally found a position, head just so, body angled, foot tapping along with the stabbing in my skull, my body tuned to the exact shape needed to lessen the agony that sweeps in waves with every accidental breath too heavy or impatient blink of the eye

if i believed it would help i would pop the offending right eye out with a tablespoon or teaspoon or anything to get this constant drip of magma or fireants or hydrochloric acid or whatever the fuck this incessant pulse of torment is made out of

then, to rub salt into this audacious attempt at whittling my sanity into a sharp point to be, likely, thrust into my own tender tendencies, someone must have sneezed next to the jeep outside my bedroom window setting off the suicide wardrums in me

screaming children, engines revving, planes overhead, moles underfoot, roaches and rats scurry through the walls, birds sing, leaf blowers roar, the puppy barks, the neighbor stomps across the floor he forgets is a ceiling, and i just want to not cry

i had finally re-found a position, head just so, body angled, foot tapping along with the stabbing in my skull, my body tuned to the exact shape needed to lessen the agony that sweeps in waves with every accidental breath too heavy or an impatient blink of the eye