stones

i like to gather
the stones
from the sides of
railroad tracks
to pack tightly
into my chest in
order to muffle
the constant pounding
stabilizing my
every frantic breath
these naturally
formed baffles
reduce vibrations
as freight moves
through the country
so why can’t they
silence my hammering
pulse whenever the
anxiety pulls me
into a death spiral
just a fool stopped
walking the tracks
seeking the perfect
rocks to complete
the jigsaw puzzle of
emotional distress
every beat of my heart
sends ripples across
the placid surface of
otherworldy disinterest
agitating the solemn
depressionary shroud
smothering all light
in a world of trains
going nowhere at the
speed of apathy

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