i prefer a warm shower

just slightly south of hot

just slightly north of cold

warm

a goldilocks shower

but in texas it gets so hot you never really get cold water during the summer

the water from the tap is tepid at best

the city sends out reports and like to brag that there is less than a certain percentage of fecal matter in the water

i would thing being fecal free is a bragging point

in my mind any feces in my bathing or drinking water is too much

but this isn’t about that

it isn’t about my headache

or feeling especially lonely today

beginning to think it should be about human waste in the water supply

but it isn’t

it’s about showering

in my last relationship we would shower together when i got home

it didn’t always lead to sex

a lot of the time it did

but not always

sometimes it was about decompressing and talking while i ran soapy hands over supple flesh

not a lot of showering together on a first date

it’s one thing to rub and caress over clothes

but i try and maintain gentleman status

not above some kissing

really like kissing

beginning to question my abilities at it

that’s another quibble

but as the water beats down my back

i read somewhere lonely people take longer showers as a means to feel some kind if connection

it seems crazy to me

but i seem crazy to me

i guess this was about being lonely

about long showers to abate the headache

the heartache

the water never feeling just right

the lack of someone to soap up

running fingers over the wet frame of

a back massage as she lets the water spray on hair and face

the intimacy of shampooing her hair and giving a scalp rub

kissing as the water pummels sore muscles

getting cold as someone takes too long in the rinse

i like a warm shower

but will gladly turn up the heat as i step aside for your turn

just ask for the same so i am not scalded

and i promise to get you clean all over

with more delicate care in certain hard to reach areas

it may take until the hot water runs out

i lost my thread

and i need a shower