oh the constipated horror of it all

this half digested mess in my mind

these sloppy words that won’t come out and play no matter how i coax them with tales of wine and women and song

no

these bastards are unwilling to come down from the rafters where they roost upside down like great big fruit bats shitting on the freshly shined linoleum

see if i care

i shine the flashlight in their strangely cute faces and they glare at me

you’re just as bad as love you smelly cocksuckers

i taunt and dance like a monkey at the zoo hoping for just a kernel of popcorn

i could blame it on a million things

the shit show at the airport, the all around doubts i’ve been swimming in, the head ache that turns out is a sinus infection

but it feels like a cop out

the greats could knock out three classics a night and all i’ve done is bitch and moan all day

fell in love three or four times with these beautiful poets that wouldn’t know me from a cigarette butt ground under heel

how easily the words sing to them and fall out of their wonderful mouths

yet i sit here bloated and angry and screaming at the top of my lungs in this empty hotel room

this isn’t my ceiling i rail as i stare up at this imposter of plaster and shame

the toilet is two sizes too big and the lights are all ungodly bright

the shower curtain rod is wavy and seems like an abomination

but the water pressure is great and it gets just to the point of warm i like it to bounce off my swollen cheeks

even if no matter of liquids can stop the scratching in the back of my throat

dry cold air on the plane and the swirling clouds of conjunctivitis lingering in the airport

and my phone rings but it is all scams and spam and people of ill refute

and i’ve given up trying to write one good piece today all the good words came out of those lovely vixens already and they left me the scraps

the scraps a dog would turn it’s nose up to

the dangling chunks of fat and gristle and ugly words that they could make pretty just by being them

so i’ll lay here and read them and fall in love over and again while the words shit on my head and i forgot to bring a hat

i’ll just read

that’ll show them