when our lips first met it seemed they had known each other all of their lives

we were clumsy and awkward but our lips knew exactly what they were doing, our tongues knew each other intimately, yours had the taste of booze while mine was minty from the gum, together it had the effect of schnapps, numbing and warming

it also tasted of home

sweaty palms and nervous glances, giggles and blushes, the feeling of knowing someone forever and never having been in the same room at the same time

my eyes greedy, trying to absorb every ounce of your sweet frame, my hands longing to trail along and squeeze, to explore and entice

our lips hoping to rekindle the adventures of dreams and fantasy

falling into and falling apart

in a vacuum liquids can boil without the presence of heat, in space a brain can boil in a matter of moments, ebullism is the scientific term for this sudden embolism in my brain, this sudden explosion of color, this retraction and speeding metabolism

in this moment i boiled in desire, shook with a pent up passion, wanted to know you like my lips know your neck, your wrist, your supple and wondrous perfection

in that moment, as time slowed and my heart raced, thumping in echo to the rhythm in your throat, a softly played song of longing of loving of needing of living of breathing of tasting of triumphant joy

of ending, of crying, of missing, of wishing, of praying, of needing to understand and no knowledge forthcoming

happiness is as fleeting as forever in the heat of the moment

hope whisper thin, love smoky and intangible, sorrow a familiar friend

i tattooed her name onto my right ventricle, her lies on my left, as blood flowed through her and out of her lies it became pain, lava flowing through my veins into my lungs where her touch is written on bronchial branches, oxygenated on her scent and rushed to my brain

this is why she is impossible to forget, the inability to let go written into the double helix that slowly breaks down

our lips knew each other before we ever met, old friends that haven’t spoke for far too long

i loved you even as i sank into the abyss, the barren nothing that was our love

one day

i’ll find the next set of lips mine long to meet again for the first time

this can’t be all there is