rains

it hasn’t stopped raining yet today as i lay here in the dark wishing you were curled up beside me

the rain lulls a sense of calm even as the torrential fallings woke me from fever induced dream

yet as i reach in the dark to my left nothing greets me beside the crater like absence of you missing

still the rain falls outside with grim determination to wash away the longing even if it’s in vain

the nightmares are back with their fierce grip on paralyzed pathos rippling across the bed

how many times have i sat upright with a gasping breath to feel your name trailing in cries

and the rain still falls outside the window while i try and rectify how you are not beside me now

my confusion is due in no small part to the sickness that plagues me with the dire dreamings

my solitary purgatorial whinings as i seek sleep to stave off the encroaching sorrow without you

and it has yet to stop raining today as the sound of each drop patters in my cavernous skull

it makes me wonder if it is truly the storm or if i lay half awake with tears streaming in the dark

i cannot tell what is real or false any longer what is dream or desire or penance or hell itself

but it is raining outside and it doesn’t stop me reaching over to wrap my arms around you

but you aren’t there

6 thoughts on “rains

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