hoarse murmurs in the antechamber of deceit

i lost my voice
somewhere along the
sleepless hollows
calling out for a sign
as the stars winked out
one by one by one
the universe turned
her pale cold shoulder
a sigh of discontent
in irradiated pulses
causing soulblisters to
leak clear catastrophes
blemishing creation

i move by feel
crawling through the
shards of childhood
miseries trapped in
maternal rejections
tacitly truculent
as tactile senses
perceive deceptions
in the heavy fog
perverting paradise
deaf blind and muted
by my own insecurities
clawing furrows across
the disembodied heart
wheezing miserably
in an ocean of fear
pulled into the dark
each fatal flaw a link
hooked to ths anchor
of treacherous self deceit

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